The Coon
by DarthBatman11
Summary: [EPILOGUE POSTED] Eric Cartman is one of the most sexist, racist, and downright rudest people you could ever encounter on the planet. But one thing can change someone's life. When Cartman falls victim to a traumatising event, he is faced with a choice. Would you hide and cower in fear, or would you stand up to those who threaten you. What would you do if you had nothing to lose?
1. Prologue

**Hello Everyone!**

 **I have finished Mysterion's saga for the meantime, and boy what a second story that was. (I mean, seriously? 4 times more reviews than the first? That's amazing!) So, I decided to try something new with other characters, and who else other than Mysterion would I use?**

 **That's right, I will be using The Coon for the first time in this story!**

 **First thing's first, this WILL be Rated M. It's still rated T because I haven't done any of the M-Rated type stuff yet, and I'm watching all 3 Wolverine movies before I begin with the action, teehee. Secondly, this will mostly be told in Eric Cartman/The Coon's PoV, however, other PoVs will also be used in this story.**

 **This will be an origin story, so please don't get pissed off if I don't include The Coon that much in the first few chapters, but he will come.**

 **I also recommend reading the first two Mysterion fanfics before you read this one, but it doesn't actually matter considering there would probably only be references to the last two stories, so do as you wish.**

 **Anyway, here is a taste of what's to come!**

* * *

Cartman.

If you asked anyone in the weird little mountain town of South Park, Colorado what you would think of if you heard the name "Cartman", you would probably get the usual responses, such as "racist, bigoted, fatass, asshole, sexist, fat lard of shit, anti-semetic, narcissistic, loud-mouthed, overweight, lazy or spoiled". Hell, that's only me. If you're talking about the name Cartman, some might think of my mother and may think of "slut, whore, tramp, hooker, prostitute". You get it by now. I'm not exactly the nicest of all people, so when my mother was taken away from me, hardly anyone cared. Do you know what it's like for everyone to ignore the only person you cared about? It's fucking shit. I'm pretty sure that lousy Jew convinced them all into thinking I murdered her or some shit.

Thing is, with my reputation, they thought that I never cared about anyone. So I asked myself this question: What would you do if you had nothing to lose? What would you do if the only person you cared about, was taken away from you. Would you ignore it and attempt to live out a normal life? Would you lay low in fear, or cowardice.

Well, let's just say my answer to that question was the complete fucking opposite.

* * *

 **So, what do you think? This is just a little tease of what's to come, and believe me, I have quite the show planned out. Anyway, please tell me what you think of this concept by reviewing, as early support is absolutely appreciated, and as always…**

 **Thanks For Reading!**


	2. Chapter 1: The Man with Claws

**So, I came online this morning to check the review count, and, lemme say this calmly, HOLY FUCKING SHIT 10 REVIEWS ALREADY?! (I'm cursing this much in Author Notes now since this is officially M Rated as of now.) BUT SERIOUSLY, HOLY CRAP. Lyoko, I'm glad you enjoyed my Mysterion stories and I hope you enjoy this one! The Driver, the reason I wanna watch X-Men Origins: Wolverine, is pretty much Sabretooth. You know, the guy that has claws nearly exactly like The Coon? Lmao! Logan is a must though. And yes, Mysterion will be mentioned at some point, but I want to focus on The Coon to make it his own story. Stephanie, I hope you enjoy this chapter! Filling, I was thinking about it but I'm making this Cartman a bit more darker. The Guest, I don't care about ric anymore. Anonymous! Welcome back! After you didn't leave a review for the last two Mysterion chapters I was like "did I do bad? I think I might have fucked it up" so can you please tell me what you thought of that chapter? It's driving me nuts xD. Rhi Rhi, I wouldn't say they were masterpieces but thanks anyway! Boneheart, I will say something in response to your comment. You're right and you're wrong. Ari, this is next, and I hope you enjoy it.**

 **Anyway, long-as-fuck Author's Note aside, let's get this shit underway!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _April 1st / 7 months since Mysterion disappeared_

Henchman's PoV

"Shut the fuck up in there you skanky whores!" I bang the wall behind me as my partner climbs in the van. I check the time, 10:30 pm, night's still clear. Damn. They'll be more of 'em then, no damn rain to keep in inside.

"Jesus Christ, what's that mark on your neck?" I ask my partner, looking at what looks to be a scratch mark.

"Damn bitch, her fucking nails are sharp man. How fucking long do we have to do this shit tonight?" He says as I drive away from the alley.

"Until we get at least 8 girls in the back or until the time hits 11:30. One more hour man. How many skanks do we have in the back? 5?" I ask him.

"Yeah, 5, and they are feisty!" He says and we laugh as I move onto another street.

"Hey, hey, I think I see another one. Yeah, she's definitely a skank." I say as we eye her up and down. Damn.

"Alright, you lure her into that alley way and I'll help drag her inside." He tells me.

"What do you mean I lure her in? You fucking seeing her?" I tell him.

"Oh come on man! Use your charm." He laughs as I flip him off. Motherfucker. I hop outta the van and start walking towards the skank. Hopefully I can sneak into her cell, maybe bang her in her sleep as she's drugged, yeah.

"Isn't it a bit too late for a lovely lady like you to be out?" I ask her, putting on some shit smile.

"Maybe I can make it worth your while. How much you got?" She asks, and I get a good look at her big tits.

"Um, 10 bucks and we can have a quickie in that alley over there?" I tell her, pointing behind me.

"You got it." She says and we head there. She looks around before pushing me to the wall and going down to my jeans. She unbuckles my belt and starts kissing my crotch.

Suddenly, Shane, the motherfucker, rudely interrupts us by grabbing her by the ass.

"Open the fucking door, man!" He shouts and I quickly act. I open the door as she shoves her inside, where a couple of girls try and get out.

"Don't even think about it!" Shane pulls a gun on them.

"Try it, go on! Try that again and I whip you so hard you'll be crying for the next month." I say before slamming the door. I hop into the driver's seat and quickly get the fuck away from here. I look beside me to see him laughing.

"What the fuck are you laughing at?" I say.

"You left your radio on. Hahaha! What, what did you say? "Isn't too late for you to be out" or something like that?" He says as he goes into hysterics.

"Fuck you man, at least she was about to go on my dick. Unlike you, you gotta fucking beat 'em with your bat to get em inside." I spit at him before driving to the next street.

"Turn on the fucking radio or some shit, anything to make me forget about those screaming fuckers in the back." Shane says.

"Yeah, yeah, sure." I say as I turn up the radio.

"Police have released figures, and as feared, crime rates have risen since the disappearance of the vigilante Mysterion, who hasn't been sighted since the Mile High attack in late August." The news is heard.

"Are they still talking about this shit?" I scoff as I turn down the radio again.

"Mysterion this, Mysterion that. He's fucking gone, stop clinging on to some crazy dude in a mask!" Shane says. I check the time: 10:45.

Damn, this'll be a long motherfucking night.

 _Midnight_

"Hey, you're staying here, guard the door." Shane says as he begins to head inside.

"Oh what? I'm on guard duty today? Man, I wanna see the new merchandise!" I complain, but he's having none of it.

"Man, fuck you. But still, tell me what they're like, and tell me where that big-titted one will be kept. Gonna try and pay a visit later on." I smile deviously.

"Man, you are all kinds of fucked up in the head man." He slams the door shut, leaving me standing outside like some dumbass motherfucker with a pistol. At least I kept some of that weed that we stole yesterday. Proud that I shot two of those mob fuckers. They think the people still want drugs, that's it's profitable. Well, sure people want drugs, but it ain't gonna make 'em much money.

"Oh, that's nice." I say as I smoke some weed. They have some dope shit, I'll give them that.

Suddenly, I hear some screams and gunshots nearby. I raise my gun for a bit.

"Eh, probably just the weed." I say, having another smoke. I cough for a bit, before throwing the used blunt on the ground. I look up to see some, squirrel man or something coming closer.

"You lost or something?" I shout over, and he begins to come closer. I raise my gun, sure that this ain't the drugs doing this.

"You really wanna come closer pal? This ain't fucking Halloween y'know." I say as he comes closer. What the fuck is he wearing? Weird, ears, some shitty red cape behind him. What the fuck. And what's that on his chest? C? What's that stand for, cuckhold?

"Hey, hey! Stop walking! I'll fucking shoot the shit out of you if you keep walking!" I shout, but he still comes closer.

"Alright, you asked for it." I mutter before shooting five rounds into his chest. He stops for a bit, but he continues to come closer, like he's unaffected by the damn bullets.

"What the fuck." I say and he's about 5 metres away from me now. I hear a weird, -SNIKT- sound, and I raise my gun again. I pull the trigger, but I'm out of bullets.

All of a sudden, he pushes my arm away and shoves his hand towards my-

"AGHH!" I scream in pain. I look down to see blood coming from my stomach, and the man takes his hand away, revealing 5 sharp as shit claws connected to the fingers on his gloves. I look up, seeing the man's enraged look on his face, before I start coughing up blood.

He raises his arm again, and slashes across my face.

Everything turns red, and then everything turns to black.

The Coon's PoV

The man collapses to the ground, blood gushing from his face and stomach. The wall is covered in his blood, and I proceed to kick the door open.

I can see about 20 or so people in the room, about 5 with machine guns and 10 with pistols. Alright then. Wait, what the fuck, there's about 15 women stripped to their underwear, on leashes.

"What the fuck…" One of the fuckers mutters before about 5 of them raise their guns, and begins to unload on me. I take a few shots but the suit prevents them from doing any damage, but I duck behind a car to prevent some damage. When I hear they are out of ammo, I proceed to roll out from behind the car.

-SNIKT-

I unsheathe my left glove's set of claws.

"My turn." I smile before rushing at them.

"YEAAARGHHH!" I yell before slashing at one dude's face, and then stabbing him in the stomach, throwing him to one side. I then duck under someone's really, REALLY retarded attempt to whack me with his machine gun, before slashing at his leg, causing him to fall, so I stab him in the chest, killing him.

I quickly get up, meeting someone trying to shoot me with a pistol. I grab the other guy's machine gun, and I blow one dude's brains out, and do the same to another not too far behind him. The gun's out of ammo, so I'm back to the claws.

I run at a group of five, leap-frogging over one while also slashing at his back, killing him. I then rip half of someone's neck out, then giving someone else the finger by shoving two middle claws through the bottom of his head, before slashing his face, causing him to fall to the ground, dead. I lunge at another dude, tackling him to the ground before I claw away at his face, leaving it a mushy, bloody mess when I'm done with it. I dive at the last guy, sticking both sets of claws in his chest as I shove him to a wall, before slashing at his face, ending him.

I turn around to see two guys armed with knives, ready to lunge at me. I then quickly duck, spinning around to slash both of their legs. I then stab them both in the neck before moving on. I then feel a shot to my shoulder, turning around to see a bunch of guns pulled on me. But that won't stop me. I run towards them, slashing one in the face, then another in the chest, then another through the neck, another by slashing at his stomach and then another by jamming both sets of claws in his sides. One guy starts shooting again, but I run at him and start shanking him in the stomach and chest, before slashing his face, sending him to the ground. Another two start shooting, so I pounce on them and take them both down by stabbing them in the chest with each hand.

I turn around to see one lone man, with a pistol raised. I run towards him as he starts to shoot, and I claw him in the leg, grounding him. I retract my claws before dragging the wounded dickhead to table, where I fasten his arms and legs to the corners of the table with some rope.

"Now, I'm going to ask a simple fucking question, and you better fucking answer this motherfucking question the way I fucking want it to be answered, alright?" I yell the terrified man.

"GAH! OKAY, JUST PLEASE, DON'T KILL ME, PLEASE!" He screams.

I grab him by the throat, unsheathing my middle claw from my other hand.

"Where, the fuck, is Liane, Cartman." I ask him.

"I, I don-, I don't.." He starts to say, and I begin to get pissed off.

"WHAT'S THAT YOU ARE TRYING TO SAY, BOY?" I shout in his face.

"I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T FUCKING KNOW, OKAY!" He cries out.

"Well that ain't fucking good enough." I say, before unsheathing all my claws and stabbing him in the throat, before slashing away at his torso and face in rage.

Suddenly, I begin to hear sirens outside the warehouse.

Well, fuck.

* * *

 **A/N: Oh, I loved writing that chapter, holy cow. So yeah, this is what you should expect from the action of this story. Please tell me what you thought of this chapter, and if I am doing anything bad or something, because I appreciate any feedback and support for this story. Anyway, I hope you all liked this chapter, and as always…**

 **Thanks For Reading!**


	3. Chapter 2: The Night Before Christmas

**So, this is gonna be some weekendly thing then?**

 **Driver, I think the spelling errors might be to do with autocorrect, but probably not. I'll look over them for sure. And I'm certainly basing the action off of Logan, cause that was fucking brutal as shit. Also, is my little universe better than the DCEU? Seriously? Haha! Smarvin, thank you! Anonymous, you're back! I know what it feels like about school, since I have to revise for exams that immediately happen after the Easter holidays, so yeah, go figure. Rhi Rhi, stay away from the hooks (please get that reference).**

 **Anyway, back to the story!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _4 ½ months earlier / December 20th_

Cartman's PoV

"Mom! MOM!" I scream, and she rushes in with my breakfast. Mmm, Baconnnnn.

"Sorry Sweetie! Here you go!" She sets the plate in front of me and I dig in. It ain't KFC but it's something I guess.

"Now, since this is your last die until Christmas, I don't want to hear any bad stuff coming from any teachers today, alright sweetie?" She says.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." I say as I stuff 3 pieces of bacon into my mouth. Damn this is fucking good.

"Oh, look at the time young man! You should finish up soon, or you'll miss the bus!" She says, looking at the clock, worried. Oh, I get it, she wants me gone so she can fuck some homeless hippie motherfucker upstairs as soon as fucking possible. Well fuck you too, Mom…

"Alright, alright." I say as I lick the entire plate clean. God, that was good.

"Ok, honey. Goodbye Eric!" She says as I put on my backpack and head towards the door.

"Forgetting something?" She asks. I sigh and kiss her on the cheek.

"Yeah, yeah, bye, bye, Mom." I say as I slam the door shut. Ugh, the bus stop is a block away. So much fucking walking, I swear this is against my human rights. I begin my long trudge to the bus stop, panting a bit after I get halfway there. I start coughing as I stumble towards the bus stop, before being completely out of breath when I finally arrive. I look up to see the regular fuckfaces. Kinny McCormick, the poor boy. Unlike the cripple Jimmy, Kenny gets different types of benefits! Hahahahahahahahaha! Anyway, Stan Marsh, the biggest fucking goth/hippie in this whole fucking town. What a sad piece of shit. Can't believe Wendy hasn't left him for me yet. And last and definitely least, that rotten, shitty, motherfucking sack of crap dirty gold robbing Jew. Kahl. It's already disgusting just to be in the same place as him, let alone right next to a, a, a JEW.

"Last day before Christmas guys! You pumped?" I ask them. No answer.

"Well, I will certainly be pumped, cause I'm gonna get SOOOOO many presents!" I brag. No answer.

"Well, Kinny, I don't think you'll be doing much this Christmas, as per usual. Probably getting an apple or some shit like that for your present. Or maybe you'll be having a threesome with Bebe and some Christmas elf down at the mall, seems like something you could do now since Karen isn't around that much." I jeer, and I notice his fists clenched. Hard.

"I'm just kidding man, no hard feelings about your sister, hope she wakes up and all that shit." I say.

"Grr.." He mumbles.

"What about you Stan? What are you going to be getting, since you're the only one, other than ME of course, that will be able to get presents for Christmas." I ask him.

"I dunno, maybe a new football or something. Might get a new toolbox since my old one got messed up while helping Dad with the car." He says, before pulling out his phone.

"Kay. And what about youuuuu, Kahl?" I move to him, but not too close, don't want to be infected with his, Jewness.

"I don't celebrate Christmas. I celebrate Hanukkah, which ends tonight." Kahl grumbles.

"Uhuh, and what did you get for "Hanukkah"?" I ask.

"A bunch of dreidels and shit, new jumper I guess." He says.

"Jesus, you're nearly as worse as poor boy over here. That is baaaaad." I sneer.

"I swear to god if you come to my house today with a megaphone and a sign saying "Jews are the TRUE Demons" I will actually throw my Menorah at you." He says.

"What menowhat?" I ask.

"Doesn't matter.." He says as the bus finally pulls up.

"SIT THE FUCK DOWN AND SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Miss Crabtree screams at us.

"Piece of shit.." I mumble as we get to our seats.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?" She screams from the front.

"I said Kahl touches his clit." I reply, while getting a look from Kahl. What a Jew. I flip him off as we leave.

I open my backpack to check if my lunch is all ready. Let's see, chocolate bar, check, chips, check, cola, check, wait, what the fuck? I take out, an apple, from my lunchbox. A fucking apple. Ugh. I put it back into my lunchbox in dismay. I guess I can throw it in the bin when we get to this shitty fucking school, then I could lie to my mom about it if she asks.

Doesn't matter anyway if someone fucks her tiny brains out, which is probably happening right now.

Liane's PoV

"OH, FUCK, YES!" I scream as he pounds into my pussy, hard.

"Yeah, you like that!" He says in a heavy southern accent. Doesn't fucking matter.

"OH, YEAH, FUCK ME HARD!" I beg as I grip the sides of the bed.

"OH YEAHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream.

Cartman's PoV

Yeah, probably fucking some homeless guy right now. Anyway, would you look at that! We're fucking here. I groan as I heave my body out of the bus, and the usual shit happens. Wendy, Bebe and Red run up to Stan, Kenny and Kahl, and start eating each others' faces, leaving me ready to throw up watching them.

"Jesus, Christ, save the eating for Christmas dinner, will ya?" I say to them.

"You're just jealous you don't have a girl." Red says to me.

"Oh fuck you too." I say, flipping her off.

"I could get any girl I wanted, it's just, everyone here is way out of my league, okay?" I tell them, and they burst out laughing. Ugh, these idiots don't get that I'm hot shit.

"In your dreams, Cartman." Wendy says.

"What are you talking about? All he dreams about is his KFC!" Bebe says and they burst out laughing again.

Assholes.

 _During PE_

"Come on Cartman, keep up with the rest of them!" Coach says as Stan and Kyle lap me for the second time. Ugh, why the fuck do we have to start cross country on the last day before Christmas break. I swear, hippies are secretly taking over this fucking school.

After numerous, tiresome laps around the school. I collapse in a heap on the finish line, gasping for air.

"I, I can't breath!" I cry out as I see the others boys laughing, already changed back into their normal clothes.

"Eric, you're time was just under, 35 minutes. I want to see a major improvement when we come back from the Winter break. Now go on, hit the showers." Coach says as he drags me up, with a struggle. Yeah, you pussy ass bitch. I'm big boned!

"What a fatass." I hear Craig mumble as I walk past the group of boys, laughing at me. They're just jealous.

 _At Lunch_

I tuck into my chocolate bar, as everyone else talks about random shit. Kahl talking about how well he did in his History exam, and then his Math exam, and his English exam, oh you get the point. Then there's Stan being all touchy with Wendy. Kenny being even more touchy with Bebe, and me, just sitting here, enjoying my chocolate.

Suddenly, I hear someone drop their bag onto the floor next to me. I look around to see a pissed of Heidi Turner sitting next to me, folding her arms and glaring at her friends, who are giggling their slutty little asses off.

"What are you doing here, sugar tits?" I ask her, and she gives me a death glare.

"Ugh, I lost a bet and now I have to sit beside your fat ass." She says, angrily.

"I'm not fat, I'm big boned! Why does everyone get that fucking wrong.." I mumble.

"What bet did you lose?" I ask her. She sits in her chair looking uncomfortable.

"I thought Rebecca was too much of a wuss to have sex with Clyde in the Janitor's closet during English. Of course, I lost the fucking bet and now I have to sit beside you for the whole of lunchtime." She sighs.

"Really? You actually thought you could win that bet?" I asked her.

"I guess.." She replied.

"She's a fucking slut, and you should know that." I tell her. She shoots me a look.

"Whatever." I say. I then notice a group of kids trying to push over some lone little shit. Oh, here we go again.

"Hey, what the fuck is happening over there?" Heidi says as she notices it too. It seems like it's about to get out of hand, yeah, they've gone to pushing each other.

"Shouldn't someone be doing something about this?" She asks.

"Yeah, just give it a couple more seconds." I say, digging into my chips. Soon enough, Kenny is already separating them, and then scares off the group of bullies.

"Told you. He's always gotta be the hero, ever since last summer." I say.

"You could do something too you know. Maybe doing something good could actually make you seem like not that much of an asshole." She says.

"Hmm, nah. Listen, if you really don't wanna sit beside me, fine by me. I'll be staying outside, too many hippies in here." I get up and leave the table, tossing my chip packet into the bin and I exit the cafeteria.

* * *

 _Christmas Eve_

"Alright honey, remember, don't wake up in the middle of the night or Santa won't come!" Mom says as she kisses me in the forehead. Ughhhh.

"Whatever, mom, g'night." I say and she shuts my bedroom door. Finally, some peace. I close my eyes, beginning to wonder what will happen tomorrow. Ah, Christmas, the day where you can get all the shit you want and eat all the shit you want. This is gonna be fucking sweet. I begin to doze off, and everything turns to black.

I suddenly wake up, hearing something downstairs. I look outside, and it's still fucking dark. The fuck. I check my phone, and the time shows 3:47 AM. I then hear another noise downstairs. Eh, probably my imagination. Whatever. I hear another noise, and then another. And then another. UGHHHHH, WHAT THE FUCK, I CAN'T FUCKING SLEEP IF SOME DRUNK ASSHOLE IS MAKING NOISE IN MY FUCKING HOUSE. Jesus.

I start to hear a muffled voice. Oh, this can't be fucking real. I stumble out of bed to see what the fuck is going on, so I can figure it out and then get back to bed, for good. I open the bedroom door to see someone disappear down the staircase. The fuck…

"Hey, who the fuck is there?" I shout, and I hear a bunch of footsteps downstairs.

"Holy shit, I thought you said everyone was asleep!" I hear someone downstairs.

"I didn't fucking know, just get her out of here and into the van and I'll check it out." I hear another voice. Jesus, how much fucking eggnog did I have last night..

I begin to head downstairs, before seeing someone in a mask, holding a gun. What the fuck!

"Holy shit!" He says and I rush past him, heading into the kitchen to grab a knife. I rush back, only to get whacked with the rear-end of someone's shotgun and knocked to the floor at the doorway. I look up to see, wait, what the FUCK!

"Mom? MOM?!" I scream as I see her being dragged to the front door.

"Hmph! Hmph! HMPH!" She struggles as someone clasps their hands over mouth and drags her outside.

"MOM! MOOOOMMM!" I scream as she gets dragged into the back of a van parked right outside my door, and then the van door closes.

"LEAVE MY FUCKING MOM ALONE!" I scream, but I get a blow to the back of my head, and everything turns to black.

* * *

 _The Next Morning_

I wake up, on the floor. My vision is a bit blurry, my head a bit dizzy. Then I realise what I saw last night. Oh, please be a dream.

"Mom!" I shout as I pick myself up.

"MOM!" I continue shouting as I rush to her bedroom. I kick open the door, to see her bedsheets messed up, and no sign of her.

"No, no, this can't be happening." I say as I rush back downstairs.

"MOM!" I scream as I search every room of the house, and no sign of her. I open the front door, to see tyre marks on our lawn. My eyes quickly fill up with tears, and I collapse on the floor again.

"MOM!" I scream, before lying like a heap on the floor, crying.

* * *

 **A/N: So, there's my version of a Cartman, in detail. I'm sorry if that smut scene caught anyone off-guard, but I just had to include it in since this thing is M-Rated. Anyway, if you liked this chapter, and are willing to give any feedback, please leave a review, as it will be very much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	4. Chapter 3: Runaway

**So, first thing's first, I will be on holiday for a week as soon as I post this chapter, so this is why I'm updating today. However, when I get back, I will probably have some chapters that I have wrote and then I can spam-upload them when I come back.**

 **Smarvin, yes that was definitely a Toolshed reference, and the last chapter will be one of the few light-hearted chapters in this fanfic, just warning you. Driver, thanks for the multiple regular reviews, in my opinion I liked Man of Steel, but BvS was meh. Throughout the story, even though he will become a merciless badass, Cartman will still be Cartman. As for the questions about my new universe, the characters are in spoiler territory, same with what happens with them after high school. I would play X-Men Origins Wolverine, if I could get my Xbox 360 to work. Anonymous, thanks for the regular review, I knew I had to do at least one smut scene in this fic, so why not have it humourous? And believe me, he won't be a goody goody.**

 **Anyway, back to the story!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

Cartman's PoV

"I want you to tell me what happened." Officer Barbrady asks me. Are you, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME.

"I ALREADY TOLD YOU WANT FUCKING HAPPENED YOU FUCKING HIPPIE PIECE OF SHIT!" I scream in his face.

"Eric, Eric, I know you're currently dealing with a very stressful situation, but I need you to co-operate." He says again.

"Do you even know what half of those fucking words that just came out of your fucking mouth mean?" I spit.

"Maybe. Now please explain in detail, Eric. What happened last night?" He asks again. I roll my eyes and groan, before finally opening my mouth.

"Last night, I was just calmly sleeping in my bed. Waiting for Mr Fatass in a Red Suit that eats all my cookies, to show up. Then, I get rudely woken up by some stupid noise downstairs. I ignored it, thinking it was Mom letting in some stranger to fuck before morning. Then, another noise, and another, and so on and so forth. Then some sort of, covered up scream or something, I don't know. So, me being really fucking annoyed, got out of my bed and opened my bedroom door, to see someone casually disappear down my fucking staircase. I then shout out, "Who the fuck is in my house?" or something and then one of those black-clad assholes whispers loudly like a dumbass retard, "I thought everyone was asleep!". Then another dumbass says "Come on, let's get out of here!" or whatever. So then I head downstairs to see some fucker dressed in black, holding a gun. But, he sees me so I rush past him to grab a knife, but then I get knocked to the ground when some asshole whacks me with his gun. The last thing I saw before I blacked out was my mom being dragged into a fucking van that was parked right outside my fucking front door. There, you got the whole fucking story, in detail, NOW WILL YOU FIND MY FUCKING MOM OR NOT?" I finish, looking at a seemingly bored Barbrady.

"Okay, I think we are done here. Do you have anywhere to stay in the meantime while we search for your mother?" He asks.

"I'll probably stay at a friend's house or something." I reply. Definitely not Kahl's house, that would be fucking miserable.

"Well, until someone comes, I can let you stay in here until I get someone to pick you up, if that's okay?" He asks.

"Ugh, fine." I reply, and he leads me out of the interrogation room.

* * *

 _The Next Day_

"Jesus fucking Christ of the all the fucking people I have to live with, I get dumped with Kenny?" I mutter to myself as Barbrady sends him in to pick me up.

"Hello, Kinny. Thanks for letting me stay at your house and all that shit…" I say.

"It's fine, I know that you're having a tough time, seeing what happened with your mother and all. Now come on, my mom's cooking dinner soon." He says. Oh fuck, what's it gonna be? Toasted Marshmallows?

"What's she cooking?" I ask.

"Toasted Marshmallows. You coming or what?" He says, and I give him a look that reads "Are you fucking kidding me right now?" before I sigh in defeat and I leave the police station.

"Let me get my things first, and then I'll crash at your place." I say.

"Fair enough. Come on get in." He says as he leads me to his, wait, CAR?

"Dude, when the fuck did you get a car?" I ask him as I get in.

"Technically, it's both mine and my mom's, since we both paid half for it. It cost like $3000 so it isn't the best of vehicles, but it runs, and that's what matters." He says.

"Huh, okay. So you ain't that poor after all. What did you get your chick for a Christmas then?" I asked him.

"A necklace, and she must have really loved it, since she came to me later that night in a sexy, tight elf costume. Yeah, then we ended up fu-"

"Dude, too much information, okay?" I say as he pulls up to my house.

"Sorry, forgot you'll never be able to experience sex in your life." He grins and I flip him off before leaving the car. Jesus, he's still a dirty motherfucker even though he lost half of his family in one night.

Oh, fucking great, a shit ton of police are at my house, great.

"Excuse me, Sir, you aren't allowed in here." An officer tries to back me away.

"Listen, bub. Don't you fucking tell me that I'm not allowed in my own fucking house, ESPECIALLY since this is MY mother that got taken from me, which is the reason you people are even here. Now out of my way, I'm just getting my stuff so I won't be tainting all of your fucking evidence and suit." I go under the police tape, giving the bird to the fucking hippie behind me.

I walk over the still-fresh tyre marks on my lawn, walking past some dude in a ?forensic suit or something, before heading upstairs to get my stuff. I pack some of my things in a suitcase, and I'm about to head back downstairs, but I decide to head into my mother's bedroom again. The entire place is covered in police shit, so I won't go near anything, but I take a look at a picture of her and I. Back when I was in 4th Grade. I pick it up, looking at it for a minute as my eyes begin to tear up. I take a deep breath before heading back downstairs, and out of my house. I head under the police tape and back into Kenny's car.

"You got everything we need?" He asks.

"Yeah, now come on, I'm hungry." I tell him, and he speeds off down towards his house.

 _Later That Night_

Jesus Christ her cooking is bad. I swear, my mom made the best shit ever, but that was just disgusting. I throw up again before hearing something nearby.

"Hey Babe!" I hear a certain blonde slut at the front door. I exit the bathroom to see what's going on, and I walk in on Kenny and Bebe sucking each others' faces off.

"Oh, Jesus…" I say as they notice me and quickly pull apart.

"Oh, um, hey Cartman." Bebe says.

"Hey Bebe. Did I interrupt something there?" I ask sarcastically.

"Oh ha, ha." Kenny says.

"Listen, you two can fuck all you want, I was gonna head out anyway." I tell them before I push past them to the front door.

"Alrighty then. Seeya Cartman, and be careful!" Kenny says as he shuts the door.

Might as well get something good to eat, time to go to KFC!

* * *

 _2 Weeks Later / At School_

"Hey Cartman, sorry to hear about your mom, man." Kahl says as we meet at the start of the day.

"Whatever." I say as I push past him to my locker.

"Dude, are you alright? You don't seem to be." Stan asks.

"I said, I'm fine!" I get all up in his face, before closing my locker and walking on.

"Cartman, dude, don't be like that. We all know you're having a bad-"

"A bad time, Kahl? You're not the first person to say that." I spit.

"Jesus, I'm trying to be nice here." He replies.

"Nice? Are you fucking kidding me? Are you hiding something Kahl? Did you hire some sort of Jew thieves or some shit to kidnap my mom because you were jealous that I had better Christmas presents than you?" I blurt out. Everyone's suddenly looking at me.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't know, what, oh Christ.." I try to walk on.

"You know, we probably all know what happened that night." I hear someone behind me. I turn around to see Craig, smiling.

"What the fuck do you want, Chullo boy?" I narrow my eyes.

"Well, you being as delusional you are, you probably did something to your mommy yourself, probably because you're an attention seeking fatass. I mean, it seems like something you would do." He says.

"Dude, what the fuck…" Kenny says at him.

"Oh, you don't like that story? Well, here's a more realistic approach to the situation. What you saw was your imagination, and in reality, your mom got lost searching for a male hooker since she's so fucking desperate." Alright, THAT'S IT.

"MOTHERFUCKER!" I say before swinging at him, hitting him in the face. He bounces back though, as he swings at me and delivers a blow to my jaw. I then tackle him to the ground and I begin to beat the shit out of his face, but I start to get pulled back. I turn around to see that ginger Jew motherfucker, and in a fury of rage, I grab him and slam his face into a locker, before pounding at his face too. I'm then grabbed off of him, and I turn around, but instead of seeing a face, I see a fist heading straight at mine. I get knocked to the ground, before seeing Kenny roundhouse kick Craig as he tries for a second punch at me.

"Yeah! Come on asshole!" I say to Craig as I get up, but then Kenny turns to me and knocks me down with a right hook, before heading to Kahl to check on him, as Stan looks at me with a bitter look on his face.

"Oh, you're getting it now you poor motherfucker!" I shout at Kenny, and I send a right fist to his face, but he then grabs me and shoves me up against a locker.

"I've had enough of your shit!" He growls.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING IN HERE?" The principal turns the corner with a few teachers, and sees the entire predicament. Kyle and Craig on the floor and Kenny holding me up against a locker.

Well, shit.

 _Later That Afternoon_

I finally arrive at Kenny's house to see my suitcase being tossed out the front door.

"Dude, what the fuck!" I scream before walking up to him myself.

"Get out of my fucking house." He says.

"What? Why?!" I say.

"You got me fucking suspended! You piece of shit! You just had to fucking punch him, didn't you!" He screams at my face.

"Come on man, I have nowhere else to go!" I tell him.

"Well you should have thought of that before you started swinging punches at people." Kenny says before he slams his front door, leaving me on my own.

"MOTHERFUCKER!" I scream before picking up my suitcase.

As I walk away, my phone starts ringing.

"Hello?" I say, pissed off.

"Hello, Eric, it's Sergeant Barbrady here, and we need to talk to you at the station." He says.

"Alright, I'm on my way." I groan before hanging up.

What the fuck will this be about?

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE STOPPING TO LOOK FOR HER?!" I scream at him, and he flinches in response.

"Eric, I know it's hard, but we haven't got anything on her disappearance except your word. I'm sorry, but we have to assume the worst." He says.

"No, NO! FUCK YOU PEOPLE, YOU CAN ALL GO THE FUCKING HELL!" I scream before running out of the station in tears. I start running towards my house, since there won't be any more fucking police there, I can cry in peace.

I lay on my bed, tears streaming down my face. I can't fucking believe that they will just give up! SHE'S MY FUCKING MOTHER!

"No, no, she can't be fucking dead. She can't be." I say, before starting to empty my suitcase and my backpack. I search around the house to see if there's any money around, and I manage to gather about $300 in cash. I pack some clothes, water, spare snacks, and finally, that picture of me and my mother from 4th Grade.

I leave my house and I head to the bus stop, and I'm just in time for the bus to Denver. I get on, and I don't look back when it leaves the town.

Wherever you are, mom, I'm coming for you.

* * *

 **A/N: So, a lot of shit happens in this chapter, and I hope that will keep you invested until I come back. If you liked this chapter, or have any feedback on the story so far, please leave a review and let me know. Anyway, have a Happy Easter guys, and as always…**

 **Thanks For Reading!**


	5. Chapter 4: A New World

**So, my hotel has wifi. It's shit, but it works.**

 **To the Driver, thanks for the regular reviews! About the whole merciless badass thing, Cartman has killed people in the past to get what he wants, so… As for the "goody goody" thing, let me just put it this way: Kenny is Mysterion, Cartman is The Coon. One uses unique ways to take down criminals, the other has claws. One I based off of The Dark Knight trilogy, the other I'm basing off Wolverine movies. You get my point. Also, when I was making these fanfics, I was basing each off some movie I watched, so I watched Batman Begins before writing Mysterion, and then The Dark Knight before Mysterion a Returns, and now Logan before this. I'm saving The Dark Knight Rises for the next one ;). AriCMpie, thanks for the review! If you recall in the first story, Kenny was pissed about getting off school before. Also, in the last chapter, Cartman was beating up both Craig and Kyle, and then the blame was put on Kenny, so you could tell something bad was going to happen. Smarvin, thanks for the review! I never thought I'd feel bad either. And Jasmine, thank you for the review and the lovely comments! Forbidshade, I already know about that douchebag, and have reported him. Yes, that was a Toolshed hint btw. About Call Girl, I'll have to wait for The Fractured But Whole to do any of those characters.**

 **Also, STAR WARS TRAILER HOLY CRAP OMGHDJWUCHENFIDME**

 **Anyway, before I have to watch that trailer again for the 100th time, here's the next chapter!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _The Next Day_

Cartman's PoV

"Honey! I'm home!" I hear a voice coming from the front door.

"Mom! You're back! Where have you been?" I ask her as she hands me a bag of, mmm, yummy KFC!

"What do you mean, pumpkin? I've been here the whole time!" She says.

"What? But you just said, you're home.." I say, confused.

"Honey, I think you need a rest." She says, and I notice there is no longer a bag of KFC in my hands.

"Mom, you were gone, I saw you being taken away by armed men in masks!" I tell her.

"So?" She asks.

"So?! I was fucking scared, mom! I woke up looking everywhere for you! I had to stay with that poor motherfucker who ended up kicking me out because I helped get his worthless ass suspended." I tell her.

"You were looking for me?" She asks, shocked.

"Why do you seem so surprised by that…" I ask her, and she starts walking forwards towards me.

"I just didn't think you would have cared." She said, before starting to walk away.

"Of course I care!" I exclaim, and I try to follow her, but she keeps getting farther away from me.

"Eric, you never cared for anyone." She says, coldly.

"Mom.." I say, continuing to follow, but she keeps getting further and further, and my surroundings become increasingly darker, and darker.

"MOM!" I scream, as she disappears and I suddenly begin to fall. I continue falling, faster and faster, towards a light that gets bigger and brighter. I begin to hear noises, such as car horns, and engines, and I realise it was all just a dream.

I open my eyes, remember that my mother never came home, that I ran away. I wake up to the sounds of rush hour, where traffic jams fill the streets of Denver. Clouds block out the sun, and soft, white snow lightly falls onto the surface of the ground.

"Jesus, it's only been one night.." I mutter to myself before sitting up.

I unzip my backpack and I take out a map I found last night. I look for where I marked my location on the map, and I begin to follow roads that might lead to somewhere where I can get a decent breakfast. Ah, there we are. Seems to be a Starbucks about 3 blocks away, in the right direction, around that corner, and continue straight for another block, alright.

I place my map back inside and I close the backpack before leaving the damn bench. Fucking cold, that is.

I tiredly through the thin sheet of snow on the pavement, around the corner, stopping for a moment to catch my breath, before pushing onwards to that fucking Starbucks.

I arrive, catching my breath before heading inside.

I stand in a long cue of businessy looking hippies and people that can't seem to be bothered to make up their mind BEFORE THEY GET TO THE FRONT OF THE FUCKING CUE. FUCK.

I wait there for a long, and I mean LONG 10 minutes before I finally get to the front of the fucking cue. Now, unlike everyone else, I decided what I was going to have long before anyone else fucking showed up. S'mores Frappuccino with extra Sugar, and waffles, duh. But wait, if people figure out I was here, they'll drag me back to that shitty town.. crap.

"Good Morning, Sir, how may I help you?" The barista asks.

"Umm, I'll have two waffles and a S'mores Frappuccino with extra sugar." I tell them.

"Alright, that will be $7.50 please." She asks, and I hand her the money.

"Thanks! Now, I just need your name." She asks. I freeze, not knowing what to say. Oh, I definitely didn't think this through. Maybe I could go with a really smart name, like Vincent or some shit? Hmm, maybe I could try something simplistic, like Wade, or Logan. What about something in the middle, like, hmm, Ethan? Is Ethan a smart name? Or should I go with Wilson, or maybe James, I don't know…

"Umm, Sir. Your name please?" She asks. I stare at her for a few seconds.

"Err, Jack. Sorry for the wait, I had a long night.." I lie, terribly.

"O-Ok, then.." She looks at me confused, before heading to the coffee machines. I mentally facepalm and shake my head. Jack, seriously, of all the badass names I could have chosen, I chose Jack? Oh well, guess I might as well have a second name like Sparrow or some shit.

"Here you are Sir, enjoy!" The barista returns with my order.

"Yeah, yeah, thanks." I say before strolling to an empty, secluded seat where nobody's shitty domestic problems or a baby crying could be heard anywhere near me. Oh, and it's not next to a window, bless corner seats.

"Oh that feels good." I say as I down the Frappuccino down my throat. I take one of my caramel waffles and I engulf it's sweetness with my mouth. Mmm.

"Damnit, David just sent a text, he can't do the delivery today." I hear someone behind me.

"What? Why?!" I another voice asks.

"He's in the hospital because he broke his leg by falling down the stairs, the dumb prick." The voice replies.

"Well, what are we going to do! We need that drug shipment in, and fast! Not to mention if we fuck this up, we won't be allowed to accompany the boss on the monthly visit to the Overlord's joint. Man, those girls are lovely, aren't they?" One says.

"Some of 'em are. I mean, I heard one guy got his dick bit off 'cause of the way some bitch was shoved into a van. But still, most of em are, woohooo." The other replies.

"But still, where the fuck are we going to get another delivery guy! The rest are unavailable, and we can't do it or else our faces will be wrecked by that Mexican's drill. We're in deep shit, man!" The voice says.

Hang on, this gives me an idea. If I heard correctly, these people just mentioned something about girls being shoved into a van, the same way my Mom was shoved into a van! This might be my only chance to find her..

"You need a delivery guy?" I ask the two men behind me. One looks scruffy looking, hair's a mess, nose is a bit crooked. Wearing street clothes. Seems to be some sort or drug addict. Meanwhile, the other guy has slick, clean hair, wearing a suit, and some stupid looking paedophile moustache but he looks more "mob" than the other guy, who's more "homeless hippie" than "gangster".

"You fucking heard all that?" One asks.

"Eh, most of it." I reply with a sly grin on my face.

"Damnit, I thought you said nobody would be around this corner!" The other says to his partner.

"Listen, say anything about what we just said to anyone and we promise to have your head jammed on a pole hanging from the roof of City Hall, got it?" One asks.

"Got it. But still, it seems like you need a delivery guy and, well, I'm in the need of some money. So what do you say?" I ask them.

"This ain't some playground stuff kid, and besides, how do we know you aren't gonna just, run off with the dope AND the money? How do we know you'll come back with nothing, and just be a waste of our time?" One asks.

"I've done stuff like this before, and believe me, I know how to get the job done." I tell them, remember that one time someone once tried to sell me cheap gravy with my damn KFC.

"Geoff, what do we do?" One asks his partner.

"Screw it, come on!" Geoff motions to me and we exit the Starbucks, but not before I stuff the remaining waffles and down the rest of my Frappuccino down my throat. He and his partner, who I have yet to learn his name, escort me to his car, a black gangster type car. Oh great, am I being dragged into a cliche?

"You spill our base's location to anyone and-"

"I get my head jammed onto a pole hanging from City Hall, I got it, I got it." I cut him off.

"I never got your name." I ask the other mobster.

"Jeremy, what's yours?" The scruffy mobster asks.

"Jack, um, Jack Kingston." I lie. Oh great, now I sound fucking Jamaican. Jesus Christ..

"Nice to meet you I guess. Geoff! Next exit!" He exclaims.

"I know, I know, Jesus." Geoff turns right, and after another block or so, he stops at our destination: an old abandoned motherfucking warehouse. Of course it's a fucking warehouse.

"I'll bring you in to talk to the boss, see if he thinks you are good enough for the job." Jeremy says.

"Believe me, I'll better than good enough." I tell him

"The boss will be the one who decides that." Geoff says as he unlocks a door and leads me inside. They escort me through a number of corridors and stuff, until I'm finally at the centre of operations. A row of cars line one side of the room, with a bunch of garage doors being closed behind them. Boxes of weapons are being taken out from the trunks of the cars, like AK-47s and Glocks. I look to the other side of the room, where boxes of what seems to be drugs are lined against the wall.

"This is quite the operation you guys have." I say, admirably.

"Believe me, before that masked freak came along and started to swiftly lower our numbers, supplies and weapons, this was considered as nothing. Nowadays, this is a gold mine." Jeremy explains.

"Now, I'm going to give you a warning, the boss isn't exactly as welcoming as we are. Good luck, kid." Geoff says as he leads me to a separate room.

"Hey boss, we got a newbie here for ya!" Jeremy knocks on the door.

"Alright, let him in!" The boss shouts back. Hey, that voice sounds a bit familiar.

"Well, go on then! In you go!" Jeremy pushes me in.

Suddenly, I'm standing in a room with a man with dark, black hair combed back, in a red suit, sitting behind a fancy desk with his back turned towards me.

"So, who might you be?" He turns around, and I realise who I'm dealing with.

"I'm, um, James, I need money so I want to be a delivery guy." I explain.

"Hmm, have I met you before?" He asks.

"Umm, I don't think so.." I say, sweating.

"You remind me of some fat asshole who ended up getting my moth- you know what, it doesn't matter." He says, and this confirms my worries.

"Have you ever had experience with any sort of smuggling?" He asks.

"Some." I answer.

"Well, this easy smuggling job shall be your initiation. I want good results James. Welcome to a New World." He replies.

"Alright. Thank you, I guess. Do you mind if I ask what your name is?" I ask.

"Most people just call me the Boss, and I'd rather keep it that way." He says, before turning his back on me again. That doesn't matter, because I already know his name.

He's Billy Miller, and the last time we met, I overthrown him in a KFC smuggling operation, and in a bunch of shitty chaos afterwards, I inadvertently got his mother killed.

And now he's my new boss, who doesn't know who I really am.

Well, shit.

* * *

 **A/N: How many of you expected that I would turn this into a mob drama? Ehhhh? And how many people thought I would use the KFC mobster from "Medicinal Fried Chicken"? Ehhhhhhhh? Anyway, if you enjoyed this chapter, and have any feedback, please leave a review because it would be very much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks For Reading!**


	6. Chapter 5: A Deal Gone Wrong

**Yay! Fast uploads for a week!**

 **Driver, good catch with the names, as they were intended to be a reference to both Wolverine and Deadpool, along with another two of those names… I wouldn't say The Dark Knight Rises will be heavily inspiring the next story, but some elements at least… and who the hell said it will be mainly a Mysterion story? ;) Also, the question about the Coon and Friends thing, too far into spoiler territory for stories I haven't even thought up of yet. So yeah.**

 **Also, only 5 chapters in and I already have 150% more reviews than the first story and nearly half of the reviews for the second! Yay!**

 **Anyway, back to the story!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

Cartman's PoV

"First thing's first, we need you to know if you can handle a firearm." Billy (Or should I use "The Boss", nah, Billy's just fine, makes him look weak and pathetic.) says.

"Of course I know how to use a gun, Jesus, you think I'm a Jew or something?" I tell him.

"Woah, woah, no need for the.. remarks. Well, if you're so confident in your use of a gun, might as well take you to our firing range." He leads me through another series of corridors before opening another door, revealing a large room with a number of targets at the back.

"Cool. Where are the guns?" I ask him.

"Look to your right." He replies, and I do so, revealing a number of weapons, such as revolvers, shotguns, assault rifles. All at my disposal.

"What would you like to try first? I personally would start with something small, such as a Glock, or a Colt, maybe an 9mm or-"

"Revolver!" I exclaim and I head to the weapons table to pick a nice looking revolver.

"A Colt Python? Quite a nice gun indeed. Perhaps the finest revolver ever made. But it takes skill to use it, you must treat the weapon with respect." He yaps on.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, give me some bullets already." I ask him. He points to an ammo table near the weapons, specifically at the .357 ammo. Oooo.

"Do you know how to work the weapon?" He asks.

"Yeah, sure thing Boss." I say as I load 6 bullets into the cylinder.

"Take your time, respect the weap-"

"Alright, where do I start shooting?" I ask him.

"Over there." He points to an empty space and hands me a pair of earmuffs to cover my ears.

"You're confident in this, Jack?" He asks.

"You bet." I say before aiming down the sight, cocking the gun, pulling the trigger and sending a bullet… whizzing past the target.

"Oh, that's interesting." Billy remarks, but I continue to shoot at the target… and I miss every time.

"That's unfortunate, and what's even more unfortunate is that this is the closest target we have." He smirks.

"Give it over." He orders, and I hand him the gun. He loads a bullet into the cylinder, spins it before flicking it back into place. He cocks the gun and aims it, but keeps staring at me. He pulls the trigger, and we both look at the farthest of the 5 targets that are there. And he got it right through it's head.

"A revolver like this doesn't really suit your beginner status. I would recommend using something like… this." He pulls out a neat looking handgun.

"Beretta M9. 15 round magazine. Maximum range, 50 metres. Seems like something more your size." He holsters the revolver before handing me the Beretta.

"Now, try again, but be a bit more patient." He says.

"Alright, boss." I try once more, taking aim properly. I line up the sights so it points at the head, and I pull the trigger. I take a close look, seeing that I hit the target, perfectly.

"There we go." Billy says, as I unload an entire clip into the target's head.

"You'll get the hang of it very soon. Now come on, I think you're ready for this operation." I take a box of ammo and load a clip full of bullets before loading it into my new Beretta, before turning the safety off. He then leads me out of the room, and through another set of corridors before leading me to a dark room, with a long table and a number of chairs, where Geoff and Jeremy lie in wait.

"You're done with the gun shit?" Jeremy asks.

"Yeah, I think he's ready for the real shit. Tell him what the deal is, and report back when you're done." Billy exits the room, leaving me with the two gangsters.

"Alright, new guy. This is the deal: we've got this good dealer, name's Fernandez, and he says he has about a block of pure Coke ready to sell for 15 thousand dollars. For us, that's a deal. Since me and Geoff here can't head in ourselves, because they absolutely fucking hate us, we'll drive you to the location, just outside the city, near the old train station ruins. You'll meet him in an alleyway there, and we'll be ready around the corner if anything goes down. You'll meet with Fernandez and you'll get the shit, and then we'll all get out of there like nothing ever happened. Got it?" Jeremy explains.

"Yeah, got it." I reply.

"Repeat it to me." Geoff orders.

"Ok, so you two drive me out to the old train station ruins, I meet the Mexican drug dealer, I give him the money, he gives me the Coke, and we both Head our separate ways pretending nothing ever happened. If anything goes down, you two will come and even the odds, that it?" I ask.

"Yeah, you got it all. Alright, come on, the car is ready for us by now." Jeremy says and we leave the room. We stroll through more corridors before entering the main area, and the mobsters lead me to the car.

"Alright, the bag of money is there, now hop in while we sort our weapons out." Geoff says, and I enter the car.

Now I have some time to think about the real reason I joined this fucking mess. Now, if I can manage to scramble up enough reputation and shit to get me to that monthly meeting, I can find out where this "Overlord" keeps his women, and hopefully, one of them could be my mother, based on Geoff's earlier description of "women being dragged into vans". Now, what would I do with this mob? Would I let them go scott-free and then run off back to South Park, making sure there would be no consequences. Or would I rather rat them out to the police and escape any hippies that try to murder me because of me doing so. Yeah, that seems more fun.

The gangsters suddenly enter the vehicle, and someone on the outside uses a pulley to open up a garage door, and we're soon leaving the warehouse, and we're heading back into the city.

"I thought you said he was outside the city." I ask them.

"He is, on the other side of the city. Once we get the stuff, we'll be taking the long way back around the city to lower any risks of the cops trying to get at us. But they'd be screwed even if they caught us, wouldn't they, Jeremy?" Geoff says, grinning.

"Oh yeah, the last time we were in a shootout, we ended up clearing out most of the cops around the place. You could say we are really good with crowd control." Jeremy brags as I see the ruins of the train station from a distance.

"So, they just given up on that train station since the explosion." I ask them.

"Yeah, since that lunatic Professor whatever the fuck his name is decided to blow up my favourite place for having public sex with someone, the council just decided to give up on rebuilding it, instead they're building a new one nearby, and using the rest of the money they have rebuilding the "police" of this city. Yeah, like that's going to change anything." Geoff explains.

"What the fuck happened to you anyway? When we first met, you looked like some homeless douchebag that came out of the bad side of a game of poker. What the hell happened to you man?" Jeremy asks.

"Let's just say, bad things happen, and they lead to other things, which leads to worse things, if you know what I mean." I say.

"Nah, man we don't know what you mean." Geoff says.

"It's complicated." I reply as we pull up at the nearby train station ruins.

"Alright, just grab the bag, and get to that alleyway. We'll be watching if anything bad happens, got it?" Jeremy says.

"Got it." I reply.

I take the bag of money and I hook it around my shoulder before cautiously walking into the alley.

"Hey! Is anyone in here?" I whisper, and suddenly Fernandez walks out.

"Who the fuck are you?" He says in a heavy Mexican accent.

"The new guy. You got the stuff?" I ask.

"Yeah I got the stuff, but the question is, do you have the money?" He asks. I reply by opening up the bag, showing 15 thousand dollars, in cash.

"Present and accounted for." I say.

"Alright then. You first." He orders, and I slowly hand him the bag of money.

"Your turn." I reply, and he hands me the bag of Coke, except, something seems a little off…

"Hang on a minute, this isn't a block, this is a bunch of small shitty bags of crack!" I exclaim. The dirty Mexican's eyes widen, and he moves his hand to his bag, presumably to reach for his gun. However, I'm too fast, and I pull mine from underneath my shirt, shooting him in the shoulder, and then in the leg, causing him to collapse to the ground in pain.

"You're a piece of shit, you know that bub." I say to the Mexican as he cries out in pain.

"What the fuck happened here!" I hear Jeremy and Geoff run up behind me, who heard the shot.

"You said he was willing to sell a block, well does this look like a block to you?" I hand them the bag of small ounces of Coke, and they both look at Fernandez, disgusted.

"You have to be fucking kidding me." Geoff says as he unholsters his gun and aims it at the Mexican's head.

"Woah, woah, no need for that. I got this." I say to him before I walk up to the Mexican, but not before I prime my gun and aim it at his head.

"Now, you listen to me and you listen good." I say as I take his weapon, before aiming my own gun at his head.

"Don't try and fuck with me, you got that bub? Never, ever, try and fuck with me. Because if you do…" I move the gun to his crotch.

"I'll make sure you will never have the balls to do it again. Got that?" I tell him, and he nods obediently.

"Good, good." I say, before holstering my gun and taking his with me, along with the bag of cash and the bag of cocaine.

"Let's go before the cops show up." Jeremy says, and we rush back to the car.

 _At the Warehouse_

"Jack! You got the stuff?" I'm greeted by Billy when we arrive.

"Yeah I got the stuff." I say as I drop the bag of cocaine on a table.

"And I got the money." I hand him the bag of money.

"Damn, Jack, you're good! I need more people like you to do this kind of shit. You will be rewarded, don't worry." He says.

"Oh, and I almost forgot, I have a new gun to put in the place's collection. Got it from the dirty Mexican who tried to sell me fucking ounces of crack instead of a block." I hand him the weapon.

"That's interesting, a Beretta 93R, or as I like to call it, the Raffica. Fires 3 rounds in short, but deadly bursts. This will be an excellent addition to the arsenal. Thank you." He says before walking off.

"Hey! Jack!" I hear Jeremy calling me from the car.

"What is it?" I ask.

"Well, since you did a great job for your first day, and since it's getting quite late, we figured you might want to join us at the local bar just 4 blocks away. You in?" Geoff asks.

"I guess so! When do I meet you guys there?" I ask.

"Is 11 o'clock good enough for you?" Jeremy asks.

"It's great. I'll see you guys there." I say and I start to walk off.

"Wait!" Jeremy stops me.

"There's something else I need you to know." He says.

"Um, yeah, sure what is it?" I ask.

"Well, a bunch of people here thought you were gonna slow us down, because they think you're a bit, um, chubby I suppose. But hey, you proved them wrong today. Just wanted to let you know." He says before he walks away.

Ugh, these people will never get that I'm not fat, I'm big boned.

Well, if I want to be on a low-profile to my fellow South Parkians, I guess I might have to change my appearance a little bit, plus, a little extra muscle can't be too bad now I'm part of the mob, right?

Yeah, that seems like a good idea.

* * *

 **A/N: I find it satisfying how I had to watch a few videos on GTA V to get the feel right for this chapter. I like crime and mob stories, and I feel like there isn't enough of them in South Park's fanfiction archives. Just a load of fucking Pairings and Unoriginal OCs that have to be great at everything, or have to be the nerdy kid that somehow ends up with the boy/girl they always wanted to be with, or whatever. God, originality is rare in this genre. Anyway, if you liked this chapter or have any feedback that you are willing to share, please leave a review as that would be very appreciated! And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	7. Chapter 6: Guys Night Out

**Back to it then!**

 **To the Driver, thanks for the regular reviews, as always, and I know that you would probably relate The Dark Knight Trilogy to the Mysterion fanfics. Yep, totally. JUST Mysterion. Mhm. Anyway, I always wanted to make Cartman a badass killer type of superhero compared to Mysterion's "beat criminals into a pulp, handing them serious injuries but not enough to cause death" type of combat, especially since CARTMAN HAS CLAWS! CLAWS! Definitely picked the right time to write this, with Logan coming out prior. And about the whole Coon and Friends thing, please take yourself back to the prologue of the first "Mysterion" story, where I stated some information that might be of some use towards your questions.**

 **Anyway, let's get this chapter started!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _Later That Night_

 _Cartman's PoV_

"This is the spot then?" I ask them as we pull up to the bar.

"Yep, 'The Secret Room', funny name, that is." Jeremy replies.

"It sounds super fucking gay." I tell them.

"Well, at first, but once you have a couple of drinks, you're sorted." Geoff replies.

"Yeah, about that, one problem…" I tell them.

"What is it?" Geoff asks.

"I'm still 17, so wouldn't I need some sort of fake ID to make it look like I'm 18 and whatever." I say.

"You don't understand, they really don't give a shit." Jeremy assures me.

"You're 17? You look a bit older to be honest." Geoff adds.

"Do I? Sweet. Alright, let's get drunk!" I reply.

"Well, we can't get too drunk tonight." Geoff says.

"And why not?" I ask.

"You see, tomorrow we have this big meeting coming up. He helps us with the weapons and stuff, and we meet every week at his joint to collect some shipments, in exchange for cash of course." Jeremy explains.

"And who the hell is this hippie?" I ask.

"Some crazy French asshole. People say he used to dig holes or some crap, other say he's a mercenary. Not many people know his name either, so he's just, mysterious." Jeremy explains.

"Yeah, mysterious and fucked up in the head." Geoff scoffs.

"Well, we'll deal with him tomorrow. Come on, let's go!" Jeremy says. Hmm, I don't know, but that description makes this guy sound a bit familiar…

We enter the bar, and I immediately notice that the place is filled with a bunch of other guys from the mob.

"Jesus, you didn't tell me that everyone comes here." I tell them.

"Yeah, because this is one of the few places the cops don't seem to give two shits about!" Jeremy says.

"Yeah, like we can literally rob a bank and casually head to this place, and they still wouldn't give a fuck!" Geoff adds.

"Sweet." I reply.

"Woah, would you look at that." Jeremy says.

"Oh Jesus." Geoff facepalms.

"What, what's going on?" I ask him.

"Jeremy is in one of his "modes" again.." Geoff says, not bearing to watch Jeremy strolling up to a- oh, and hot as shit bar lady.

"Oh, I see.." I reply.

"Yeah, every single time he sees a hot girl in the room, he goes up to them to try and swoon them. And every single time, he fails and it's fucking hilarious." He explains.

"Why hello, gorgeous." Jeremy says to the attractive barmaid.

"Umm, hello?" She says, looking confused.

"It's a great night tonight, don't you think?" He says, in a really fucking gay voice.

"Umm, I suppose?" She replies, still confused.

"Maybe I can make it a fantastic night, for the both of us." He whispers to her, and I can barely contain my laughter.

"Umm, I'd rather be with the fat oaf that's behind you." She replies, before walking away. I burst out laughing, before realising something.

"Hey! That bitch meant me!" I say, before walking up to her.

"I'm not fat, you slutty fucking cow. I'm BIG, BONED." I say to her face.

"Whatever, love." She says, winking at me, before tending to her customers.

"What a fucking Jew." I say as I sit down at the counter.

"Well, that was quite the episode." Geoff says as he joins me.

"Eh, I think she's into me." Jeremy joins us.

"Whatever. Hey! Barmaid! Over here!" I shout over at one that seems she can't be bothered to do anything other than being on her phone. Yeah, go on, hashtag it, retweet it, take drunk selfies of yourself and accidentally send nudes to everyone on your Snapchat friends list. Go on bitch.

"What do you fags want?" She asks us while she pops a piece of chewing gum in her mouth.

"I'll take a glass of vodka." Jeremy says.

"Rum!" Geoff says.

"Beer will do." I tell her.

"Alrigh- hang on a minute. How old are you?" She asks me.

"Does it really fucking matter?" I spit back in her face.

"Eh, not really." She says and she walks away to the machines. Phew.

"See, I told you. When it comes to this joint, nobody gives a flying fuck!" Geoff tells me.

"Will you get the fuck off of me!" I hear from one side of the room. I look around to see a woman trying to escape her seat, but keeps getting pulled back by these pedo-looking motherfucker.

"Is anyone gonna help her?" I say as the situation seems to get worse. The dude starts licking her face as she squirms, clearly uncomfortable during the whole situation.

"Why should we? It isn't our problem, or our business to do anything about it." Jeremy says.

"Besides, I'm 70% sure that she's his property by now." Geoff adds.

"Property?" I question him, a bit confused.

"Yeah dude, you know, he bought her to be his lapdog or some shit. Must be one of the Overlord's clients or something." Geoff explains.

"Oh." I say, a bit fazed by the truth. That's a bit disturbing, even for my standards.

"Besides, we don't want to mess with the Overlord's business. We have a good deal with him, gets us some good money." Jeremy says.

"Okay then…" I say, before continuing to watch the scene. I begin to notice the sort of things that makes sense with human trafficking. Like for example, the girl is wearing some slutty outfit, that looks way too small and tight for her. Quite a lot of makeup that doesn't look natural on her, and all that shit.

"Here you go!" I look back to see the barmaid handing us our drinks. Geoff hands her the money to cover it.

"Hey, guys." Jeremy motions for us to stop before we down our drinks.

"Today was a good day. To our new recruit!" He says, and we all down our drinks at the same time. Wow, beer tastes fucking nasty.

I continue to watch the scene playing out in front of me. The girl continues to struggle free from the man's grasp, and she succeeds for a second, but ultimately, she gets caught and dragged back onto her captor's lap, to which he slaps her for the ordeal.

At this point, I stop staring at them, returning to my drink, and lowering my head. My fist begins to clench as I start to remember things that happened on a Christmas Eve.

"Hmph! HMPH!" I remember my mother unsuccessfully trying to escape from her captors' grasps.

"LEAVE MY FUCKING MOM ALONE!" I remember screaming that at them before they threw her into that van and slammed the doors shut.

I return to reality, clutching my drink quite tight.

"Grr…" I grumble before drinking half of my drink.

"Something up mate?" Jeremy asks me.

"Nah, it's just I haven't drank in a while. Still getting used to it again." I reply. I turn back to realise that the dude's gone, and the girl's left alone sitting there. She must be scared to leave or something. I look around before finding the asshole walking past me, and into the bathroom. Hmm..

"Excuse me guys, I need to take a dump." I say before following him into the restroom. I crack my neck before walking in, and the guy's using the urinal. I take the one next to him, trying to not be that obvious.

"I noticed you have a nice lady with you tonight." I tell him. He smiles, giggles for a bit.

"You seen her? She's a good one, isn't she?" He replies.

"Yeah, she sure is." I say.

"I'll tell you, she is quite enthusiastic too." He says, and that right there gave it away. Pretending that she's all over him to make it seem like it's not so fucking obvious.

"I see." I say as he finishes up and moves to wash his hands.

I make sure he's looking down at the sink before I grab his head and slam it into the mirror, before throwing him against the wall. I pick him up, delivering a few punches to his face and mid-section, before dragging him into a stall. I shove his head down the toilet, send the seat crashing down on his head before flushing it.

"Don't ever think that nobody knows what you do, and don't ever think that nobody will try and do something about it. Got that bub?" I say, leaving him lying in a heap on the floor, before casually exiting the restroom. I walk up to the lady, who seems a bit scared, but I calm her down before moving closer to her.

"Get out of here before he wakes up." I whisper into her ear, and her eyes widen.

"Thank you. Thank you!" She says before quickly leaving the bar. I return to the mobsters before grabbing my drink, downing the rest of it, and setting it back on the counter.

"Well, you said it's a big day tomorrow, so I think I'm going to head a little early. Is there anywhere I could stay for the night?" I ask them.

"You can stay in the warehouse! There's some beds on the second floor, and I'm sure the Boss will allow it, 'cause he allows it with everyone nowadays." Geoff says.

"Seeya Jack!" Jeremy says, and I walk away from them.

"Hey, isn't that fatass our new guy?"

"Jesus, look at the size of him."

"I think he might be a cop, because it looks like he ate too many doughnuts!"

I hear a bunch of people comment about my weight as I leave the bar. Yeah, well fuck it, I'll head to the gym tomorrow, get super ripped. Besides, if one of those fags back at the town saw me, they probably wouldn't believe it was me because I became even more hot.

* * *

 _The Next Day_

I grab my bottle of water and chug the contents down my throat. Jesus Christ! I just ran on that treadmill (more like dreadmill, eyyy) for more than 5 minutes! Holy shit! Oh well, I guess that's that done. Might as well head on to the fun stuff. I move to the weights and I start bench pressing some heavy shit. Man, I seem to be strong, and I lift this tough barbell 20 times. Suddenly my phone starts ringing, and I find Jeremy on the screen. I set down the weight before picking the phone up.

"Hello?" I say.

"Hey, dude! Get your butt to the warehouse, we're heading to meet the French weapons guy! Come on!" I hear him screaming at me through the phone.

"Alright, alright, I'm coming." I tell him, before hanging up.

 _In the Car_

"So, we're taking a van and a car this time. Why?" I ask them.

"We have quite the heavy shipment today. About 20 boxes of weapons how into that van, and another three with you in the back of this car. Thomas and David are in the van, and will help you load the shit. Now, this guy might seem a bit crazy at first, so don't do anything to piss him off." Geoff explains.

"Just hand him the money and help with the weapons and shit." Jeremy says as we head into a U-Stor-It alley. I see a bunch of guys coming out from one of the storage units. We exit the car, and I bring out two bags of cash, along with Jeremy and Thomas and we set them down on the ground in front of the men.

"I DON'T GIVE A SHEET! YOU GET ME THAT FUCKING EQUIPMENT NOW OR I WILL TAKE ZIS SHOVEL OF MINE, USE IT TO BASH ZE TINY FUCKING BALLS YOU 'AVE, AND THEN FORCE ZEM DOWN YOUR FUCKING THROAT!" I hear a French voice coming from the unit, before a dirty, young man comes out of the unit with black messy hair, and a cigarette in his mouth.

"Sorry you 'ad to see zat. Hey, who ze fuck if zis douchebag?" He looks at me, and I begin to get familiar senses again.

"New guy, and he's good with this type of crap." David says.

"Well, I might as well properly introduce myself. Whoever ze fuck you are, my name is The Mole, good to meet you and all zat sheet." He says, and my eyes widen as I realise who this is. Someone who, of course, has a grudge against me because I let him get mauled by guard dogs once.

Well, fuck.

* * *

 **A/N: Yay! New characters! Ever since watching South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut, I automatically came to the conclusion, that even though Christophe has about 4 minutes of screen time, he fucking nails it in those 4 minutes of screen time. Yeah, Gregory can fucking die in a hole, posh prick, but Christophe is a badass! Anyway, if you liked this chapter and have any feedback, please let me know by leaving a review, as it will be very much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	8. Chapter 7: A Meeting with a Mole

**Yay! More chapters!**

 **Driver, again with the reviews! Thank you! I always thought Cartman had a human side to him, even though he would still be a selfish prick to everyone. No problem for sending you back to Mysterion, now you have an idea about what I have in store for you guys! As for the Star Wars stuff, I'm intrigued of Luke Skywalker thinking that the Jedi should end. Also, calling it now, Battlefront 2 will be one of the best games of the year. Awesome, it looks. My top 5 superheroes are as follow, in order from 5 to 1: Professor X, Quicksilver, Superman, Wolverine and Batman. (There's a hint in there to the next superhero I'm going to do next). And no, I'm not seeing Guardians of the Galaxy 2, it just doesn't interest me that much.**

 **Anyway, I don't think you want to read me droning on and on, so back to the story!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

Cartman's PoV

"So, are you going to stand zere like a stupide homeless beetch or are you going to tell me your fucking name?" Christophe asks, waking me up.

"Oh, uh, right. I'm Jack, Jack Kingston." I tell him. He narrows his eyes a bit.

"Hang on a minute. Do I know you from somewhere?" He asks.

"Umm, I don't think so." I reply.

"You remind me of someone, zat is for sure." He says.

"Mind telling me who this person is?" I ask.

"Sure. Some fat brainless beetch that forgot to turn off some stupide alarm, leading me to get mauled by a bunch of fucking grand comme merde guard dogs." He says, angrily.

Oh shit he fucking remembers.

"That beetch ended up getting me killed and I had to stay in God's worthless heaven bullsheet place until I ended up getting brought back to life for no fucking reason. It's like God was playing a trick on me or some sheet. Yeah, he's the biggest beetch he of zem all." He says, throwing away a cigarette before quickly lighting another one. I look behind me, and the others just give me looks that read "I have no idea what the fuck he is talking about." and "Yeah, he's pretty fucking jacked up in the head." with added shoulder shrugs and the odd shake of the head.

"Anyway, we 'ave the weapons 'ere, do you 'ave as money?" Mole asks. I point to the two money bags next to me.

"What the fuck did you think we're in these? Teddy bears?" I ask sarcastically.

"Ohoho, okay zen, we have a comedian over 'ere. I'll have to warn zhem to keep zan eye out for you." He laughs before grabbing the bags and signalling us to follow him.

"You know ze drill, bring zat van in close 'ere and we will give you ze sheet. Ey, John, James, Jack, whatever ze fuck your name is, follow me, I want to speak with you." Christophe says, and I follow him to another storage unit.

"Get in." He says as he pulls up the door. Inside, the walls are a mess, and a bunch of crap is up on the walls, like notes and shit, and in the centre of it all, there's an empty desk with one chair on each side of it.

"Go on, 'ave a seat." He says, and I obey. I take the seat closest to the door as he moves to the seat on the other side.

"So, you're are ze new guy? You sure you are um, let's say, fit for ze job?" He says, acknowledging my weight.

"Actually, asshole, I'm starting to work out." I say, and he bursts out into laughter.

"What, is there something funny about a guy working out?" I ask.

"You, of all people, working out? You 'ave to be fucking keeding me!" He continues to laugh.

"Why the fuck did you drag me out here anyway?" I ask, pissed off. Then, he suddenly brings out a shovel.

"This shovel, is practically my equivalent of a soul mate. You see, I 'ave 'ad zis shovel since I was a young boy." He rubs his shovel up and down. Jesus, this is getting awkward.

"And you are telling me all this shit, why?" I ask. He suddenly stands up and grabs the shovel, resting it on his shoulder.

"What kind of a fucking name is "Jack Kingston" anyway? That is one of ze most gayest fucking names I have ever heard in my entire fucking life." He says, walking around the desk before he's directly in front of me.

"I have no idea what the fuck you are talking about." I say, begin to sweat.

"Do you actually think I am fucking stupide? Eric, FUCKING, CARTMAN YOU FUCKING BEETCH!" He swings his shovel at me, but I quickly dodge.

"YOU FUCKING LET ME DIE TO FUCKING GUARD DOGS WHILE MAKING ME ROT IN 'ELL WITH SOME ARABIC SEX DRIVEN MOTHERFUCKER!" He swings his shovel again, and I duck, moving behind him.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't bash your thick fucking skull into fucking mush!" He screams. I then grab behind me and whip out my pistol, aiming at his head.

"Are you actually fucking keeding me?" He asks, before swiftly knocking my gun from my hand with his shovel before pointing it at my neck.

"You forgot that I was a fucking mercenary during the time of La Resistance, and that was when I was 9!" He says.

"Maybe if you are so fucking smart, you should be thinking why I'm out here, doing actual work and gaining money from drug lords instead of sitting on my ass, playing games and eating KFC?" I say. He narrows his eyes, before lowering his shovel.

"And if it wasn't for me, that Arabic sex driven motherfucker would be ruling the world right now." I say, and he looks at me confused.

"How ze fuck did you stop zat from 'appening?" He asks.

"A malfunctioning V-Chip and a shit ton of fucking swear words." I say.

"Alright, now explain why ze fuck you are 'ere, instead of being a fat shit back at that fucked up town." He asks.

"Shit happens." I tell him, but he raises his shovel again.

"No, no, no, beetch. I got fucking mauled by dogs because of you, now you tell me what ze fuck you are doing here or you walk out of 'ere with a pancake face, beetch." He points his shovel at me.

"Alright, alright, Jesus. Some assholes kidnapped someone I cared about, and I have an idea that the only fucking way I can find her is that if I joined up with the mob, okay?" I say.

"Zat, is seriously fucked up. And wait, did you say a she? How ze fuck did your fat ass get a girlfriend." He jeers.

"It isn't a girlfriend.." I sigh, embarrassed.

"Dude, it's your fucking mommy? Zat is even more pathetic!" He laughs, but I quickly push away his shovel, grab him by the collar and shove him up against a wall.

"Listen to me you French piece of shit! Talk about my mother like that again and I will gladly use that shovel of yours to dissect your smoke filled lungs and your shit filled intestines before force feeding it all down your throat." I growl.

"Zat all you could possibly do?" He smirks.

"Oh, so you want 10 guard dogs tearing into your ass like the zombies in The Walking Dead? Fine by me." I smirk back.

"Alright, alright, Jesus fucking Christ just let me go you fat piece of sheet!" He says before I drop him. He grabs his shovel and begins to… stroke, it..

"Never touch my fucking shovel ever again." He warns.

"Whatever, listen, you better not tell those people what I'm doing." I say to him.

"And why ze fuck shouldn't I?" He says.

"Because if you do, not only will I my search for my mother be a lot fucking harder, I will have them up my ass because their leader is someone I dicked over in the past, oh, and what else, oh yeah I would fucking kill you with that "sheety" little shovel of yours." I spit.

"DON'T YOU FUCKING INSULT MY SHOVEL YOU ASSHOLE." He shouts.

"Whatever, I have a job to do if you don't mind." I say before picking my Beretta from the floor and leaving the unit. I walk back to the van, where the rest are beginning to load the weapons in. Jesus, I thought they would have the shit done for me already, lazy fuckers.

"Where the fuck were you?" David asks.

"Met the French dude, you're right, he is fucked in the head." I say as I lift a box of guns and place it in the back of the van.

"What the fuck is even in these boxes?" I ask.

"Most of it is just ammo for the guns we already have, like about 20 of the boxes are full of bullets, well, 15 you could say and about 3 more full of explosives. Then there are two boxes filled with handguns, SMGs, you know, the small stuff. Then 3 boxes full of assault rifles, snipers, hell I think he even has a minigun in one of them. The big kind of shit, y'know?" Thomas explains.

"You seem to like your guns." I tell him.

"Well, yeah, my father taught me how to hunt early, and I've had his own hunting rifle ever since." Thomas says, and I notice his extremely obvious Brooklyn accent.

"What about you? What did you do with your dad?" He asks me.

"Well, I never really knew him actually. He left when I was young." I say, remembering that in actual fact, he was Scott Tenorman's father, someone who I ended up getting killed, accidentally on purpose. Watching Scott cry as he realised he ate his parents remains, were, and always will be, funny as fuck to me.

"Man, that's rough. My mom died when she gave birth to me, so I never had a mother. Instead I had some crack-obsessed father who always thought of me as a disgrace. Well it wasn't that much of a disgrace when I socked him in the jaw when I was 14!" David laughs.

"Wow, that must have been rough." I say.

"It was, I still have the marks on my back that he gave me with his belt." David says before loading another box into the van.

"Hey! You two! Come 'ere, I want to show you something!" I hear The Mole call out to us, and I begin to walk forward, but he holds up his hand to stop me.

"Ey! Not you! You have to load ze boxes into zat van, remember? I don't like my men's time being wasted waiting for you people to get out so we can get back to work!" He smiles before walking off with Thomas and David. Oh, I get it now you fucking French hippie motherfucker.

I begin to heave the boxes into the vans, and boy it is fucking hard without 2 more people. Guess I'll have to get back to the weights when this is done.

"Jesus, how fucking long does it take to see a couple of things." I say as I load my tenth box in. What the fuck is happening in there.

 _At The Warehouse_

"Why the fuck did that take so fucking long!" I ask Thomas and David who have just gotten out of the van.

"Can't tell amigo! Top secret shit, doesn't want it getting out." Thomas says.

"Yeah, right. You're fucking lucky, because I loaded all that shit for you! Now you two fucking owe me for breaking my arms for you!" I say, pissed off.

"Alright, alright, Jesus. We'll buy you a drink tonight, at The Secret Room tonight, alright?" David says.

"Alright." I say.

"Hey! Jack! The boss wants to see you." Jeremy says to me. Oh what the fuck now?

I walk through the corridors until I find Billy's office, before knocking on the door.

"Come in!" He says, and I step inside, closing the door behind me.

"Don't bother taking a seat, you won't be here for much longer." He says as I'm about to sit down.

"Alright… what did you want to see me for?" I ask.

"You see, I've been quite impressed about your contribution to this operation, especially after I heard you loaded all those guns by yourself. Great selfless act." He says, and I chuckle a bit.

"That was a piece of cake, believe me." I gloat.

"Yes, well, anyway, I think you might be interested joining me, Jeremy, Geoff, David and Thomas at the end of the week. You see, we have a monthly deal with this gangbanger known only as the Overlord. Every month he sends a bunch of people to collect a drug shipment we deliver, and in return, they give us some money, plus a little fun time with some of their girls. This deal happens in 4 days time, so are you in?" He asks me.

I think of the opportunity that has just presented itself, and boy these fuckers have no idea what they're in for.

"I'm in." I say.

* * *

 **A/N: As I am posted this, it's midnight on the last day I'm on holiday, so you won't be getting another update until at least Saturday or Sunday, probably Sunday. Anyway, since this gangster crap interests me, I finally got Grand Theft Auto V, so maybe I can have some inspiration from that, I don't know. But anyway, if you liked this chapter and have any feedback, please leave a review as it would be very much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	9. Chapter 8: The Enforcer

**I'm Back!**

 **Louisent, Mysterion meeting The Coon? Maybe… ;) Driver, thanks for the regular reviews! So, you meant movies? Well in that case, 1. The Dark Knight. 2. Logan. 3. Batman Begins. 4. X-Men First Class. 5. X-Men Days of Future Past. As for the way Mysterion could meet The Coon, well, remember when I said I'm inspired by the Dark Knight movies? Well, I haven't been using anything from The Dark Knight Rises yet, so… Johnny Cash's Hurt is a great song, but I have another song that isn't as well known, that I might use in another story. I had to put Cartman into shape at some point. Battlefront 2 looks interesting, but The Last of Us Part II won't come out until like 2019 :(((. Red Dead 2 looks good as well. GTA V is fucking awesome! Love the driving. I haven't seen Rogue One yet, but I really need to and I might watch it this weekend. So, yeah I'll keep the question about that or TFA until after I see it. As for updating, here you are!**

 **Anyway, let's get right in!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _3 Days Later / January 14th_

Cartman's PoV

I set down the weight when I realise I haven't turned my phone on in days. I take my phone out of my backpack, switch it on, to realise I've missed 5 calls and 11 texts. Oh Christ. Let's see, Kenny called me once, Stan called me Twice, Kyle called me once, and, wait what the fuck, Heidi called me? How the fuck did she get my number? Anyway, 4 tests came from Kenny, they say:

January 9th | 19:54

 _Hey, dude, I'm sorry for kicking you out, and I hope you have a place to stay._

January 10th | 16:20

 _Cartman, you didn't show up at school today, are you okay?_

January 12th | 14:07

 _Cartman you haven't showed up in days, we tried to call you and we visited your house and you weren't there. This is starting to scare a couple of people, they think you've been kidnapped. Where are you?!_

January 12th | 19:38

 _ERIC, WHERE ARE YOU, PEOPLE ARE GETTING SUPER FREAKED OUT BY THIS!_

Wow, at least he fucking cares. Everyone else just seems to be a bunch of pussies and are only concerned for their well being. Pricks.

Who else texted me, oh, Kahl, let's see what this Jewish dickhead is whining about now. 3 texts, okay.

January 9th | 15:47

 _You deserved to get your ass kicked by Kenny you fat fucking prick! We're sorry for your mother, we tried to be caring but since you decided to be an asshole, as USUAL, you can go fuck yourself._

January 11th | 20:19

 _Uh, Cartman? We haven't seen you in school the last two days and you've been offline on anything, are you sure you're fine? At least let us know that you're going to kill us or something.._

January 12th | 15:02

 _Cartman, we were at your house, where the fuck are you? You haven't been seen in days, nobody knows where you are and people are getting scared… reply dude, please._

Okay, Kahl is sort of caring but still a total fucking douchebag, alright then.

Oh, this should be fun, one text from Craig.

January 9th | 15:45

 _I swear to fuck Cartman, putting your hands on me was your biggest mistake you have ever or ever will make. The next time I see you I swear to God I will make you fucking cry more than you did when your mommy was "abducted", you scheming fuck!_

Oh, I'm so going to bury you if I ever see you again, monotone chollo-wearing fag.

Alright, final 3 texts from Stan.

January 9th | 15:26

 _If you ever hit Kyle again, that's right, Kyle, not KAAAAHHHLL, I will kick your fat fucking ass all the way to fucking Denver, you piece of shit._

January 11th | 20:59

 _Umm, where have you been the past few days? You know what, fuck it I'm heading to your house tomorrow with Kyle and Kenny to find out what's going on with you._

January 12th | 17:24

 _WHOEVER THE FUCK HAS THIS PHONE AND KIDNAPPED ERIC CARTMAN, YOU WILL GET FUCKING BEAT INTO THE GROUND I TELL YOU, BEAT INTO THE GROUND IF WE FIND HIM!_

Okay, Stan has to be that one heroic asswipe then, okay. And me? Kidnapped? Seriously? I'd probably kidnap my kidnapper and force him to eat the remains of gassed Jews. Probably Kahl first, so I could easily get rid of the body.

"Whatever." I say before going back to the barbell.

* * *

 _The Next Day_

"Alright, Jack, this is your first time on this run, so keep the talking to us, got that?" Jeremy asks.

"Yeah, whatever." I say as I hop into the car.

"Alright, so what is this, 20 kilos of coke, for what, 300k?" Geoff asks Billy as he steps into the back seat.

"Yes, Geoff, and remember, we pull this off clean, you get to have some, well, fun." He says as he cocks the barrel of his revolver.

"Oh yeah, we're gonna have some fun alright, ain't that right Jack?" Geoff asks.

"I suppose." I reply, staring out the window as we exit the warehouse.

"Man, why the fuck do you look all depressed and whir? You need a shrink or something? Cheer up, mate, we gon' get some action tonight!" Jeremy says as he turns the corner.

"I'm not really into that kind of crap, actually." I say, to the shock of the duo.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Geoff says, bewildered.

"I'm, just not into fucking some random bitch if they don't feel like they want to suck my dick. I mean, if it's some skank dragged of the street, at least make it seem like they want my fat bulge underneath!" I laugh.

"Oh, I see, wanna fuck someone you know then, alright." Jeremy says.

"Man, you must be gay if you turn down some of the bitches you're about to see." Geoff says.

"I'm into hustling dickheads that think they can sell me cheap drugs, I'm not into rape." I tell them.

"Whatever, man." Geoff says.

"Alright, let's go over this one more time. Jack, David and Thomas take the drugs out of the van and hand them to them, and remember, place them in the van that will be on the right. The van on the left is filled with, well, you'll find out after the job is done. Anyway, Jeremy, Geoff, you take the money and load them into this car. Then, after all of this, we can have a little fun of our own. Jack, if you don't want to be apart of it, find something to do in the car. What I recommend is counting up the money to make sure we have enough. Got it?" Billy explains the situation to us all.

"Gotcha." I say, and the rest nod in assurance.

After Billy's plan is explained, I realise that Jeremy has driven us into a not so friendly neighbourhood. The rest seem unfazed by this, but me? I'm sceptical..

Jeremy ends up driving us into a large alley way with two exits. Thing is, the exit we are facing is blocked, by two vans. In front of these vans are about 10 masked gunmen, all carrying assault rifles. In front of them are 3 men, 2 unmasked gunmen, and one black male wearing a suit, in contrast to the rest of them wearing street clothes.

"Is that the Overlord you people keep talking about?" I ask them.

"What? No, of course not!" Jeremy says.

"No one has actually seen The Overlord. He's the man, or woman, that runs everything, but like a puppet master. Never gets into these things directly." Geoff explains.

"So who the hell is this fucker then?" I ask.

"Him? I suppose you can call him second in command or something. They call this dude The Enforcer, mainly because he does The Overlord's dirty work for him." Jeremy explains as we step out of the car. Our van soon pulls up behind us, Thomas flicking his long blond hair to the side as he steps out, and David placing his cap on his head as he comes out with a shotgun.

"Hopefully we won't need it." Billy says to us as he walks forward to greet The Enforcer.

"Fresh meat, I see?" The Enforcer says, stating me down.

"New, but reliable." Billy remarks, as he gestures to us to bring out the drugs.

"Hand 'em to my boys, Glenn, and Shane." Enforcer points to the two men beside him, one with a buzzcut, wearing a black t-shirt, jeans and giant boots, the other with a comb-over, sunglasses, and a full set of black clothing, leather jacket and all, with chains around his neck.

"Hey, not so fast." Billy puts his hand in front of me as I'm about to hand some drugs.

"Don't give anything until they show us the money." Billy orders them.

"Woah, we have been doing this a long time, no need to be so, concerned." Enforcer says as he snaps his fingers. Three men then pull out 6 full duffel bags out of the van, and set them on the ground in front of us, open them, revealing a shit ton of money in each bag.

"$50k in each bag, and you should know this by now, Boss, I never lie." He says.

"Alright then. Boys, give 'em the merchandise. Jeremy, Geoff, take the bags of cash and set them into the car." Billy orders, and we swiftly do this.

"Hey, you sure you should be doing this? I mean, for someone to be on this type of duty you would expect for them to fit through a doorway." The leather clad asshole remarks.

"Actually, I'm working out since I got this job. Besides, I'm surprised you can fit through the door, with all that ego having to squeeze through." I spit as I load the rest of the coke into their van.

"Now listen here-" He's about to retaliate but The Enforcer cuts him off.

"Shane, cut it out." He orders. Shane backs away, but not before giving me a dirty look in the process. Asshole.

"Well, well, another job well done. As for your boys, I believe they should have a little fun. Glenn, open up the left van for us." The Enforcer says, and the man with the buzzcut moves to the side door. As soon as he opens it, however, a woman quickly pushes him away, and tries to run away from us.

"What the fuck!" I exclaim before The Enforcer pulls out a revolver and guns her down, before walking up to her and putting a bullet through her skull to make sure.

"Holy shit…" I say as the rest of the gunmen force other women out of the van at gunpoint. They then open a door that leads out of the alleyway and into a building, and pushes them in.

"Get the fuck inside!" They shout. One woman tries to look at the corpse in front of us, but she gets smacked and pushed inside.

"Anyway, sorry about that. Just go inside and receive your prize, gentlemen." The Enforcer says to my grinning colleagues.

"Sorry about this, um, sir, but uh, if you wouldn't mind, I'd rather stay in the car." I speak up.

"Are you serious?" He asks, narrowing his eyes.

"He has offered to count our money for us, just to make sure, and he seems a bit shy, too." Billy remarks, and some of the gunmen begin to giggle, while Shane just smirks. I just roll my eyes.

"Well, the prize will still be waiting if you change your mind. Just come down to one of our places of operations, it's about a block away from that cinema which burned down over the summer. It's an old abandoned garment factory, you can't miss it." He offers.

"I'll consider it." I say as I walk back to the car, the rest heading into the building. As I step into the car, I overhear something.

"Try not to use the whips as much as last time, boys!" I hear the Enforcer laugh, and I slam the car door in disgust.

Is that seriously how they treat them?

I gag as I think about that woman being shot. I hope the same never happened to my mother.

I try not to think about it as I begin to count the money.

 _Later That Night / At The Bar_

I walk into The Secret Room, and I'm about to sit down before I hear something.

"You're actually a fucking slob, now get the fuck away from me you fucking dickhead!" I hear a woman scream as she tries to leave a table.

"W-what? Come back here y-you bitch!" Suddenly, this man who looks heavily drunk, grabs her and pins her down on a table. Me, still really pissed off about what happened at the deal, decides to go up to him, grab him and slam his head into the nearby counter, and pressing his face against it to keep him there. I then grab an empty beer bottle, smash it against the table and hold it up against his neck.

"You done, bub?" I say, angrily.

"Let go of me you fucking crazy bastard!" He says.

"Then stay the fuck away from the lady, got it?" I say. He nods, before running out the bar as fast as possible. I then sit down at the counter.

"I'll take some water, thanks." I pass the bartender a fiver and I notice the news on the TV. Looks like they finally found out I'm gone. Well, shit. The bartender then passes me my drink.

"That's sad, isn't it? Can't bear to know what it feels like to be one of the people that care about those who just, disappear." She says to me, as I take a sip while stating at the TV.

"You know this lady or something?" She asks.

"Yeah, you could say that." I say, now looking at her.

"I've been coming here for like, the last week now." I continue.

"Alright. Why? Um, thinking maybe?" She asks.

"Yeah, thinking. A whole lot of thinking." I reply.

"Mind I take a guess to what you're thinking about?" She asks, and I nod.

"Alright, well, maybe you're thinking how this situation could turn out?" She says, but I shake my head.

"Hmm, you're thinking about the future?" She asks, and I nod my head.

"Alright then. Hmm, you're thinking about, maybe optimistic things?" She asks, but I begin to laugh.

"What, what is it?" She asks.

"Nearly everyone says these things. I'm not thinking about that." I say as I take another sip.

"Well, do you mind telling me what you think?" She asks me. I down the rest of the drink before setting the glass down.

"Revenge." I reply before getting up and leaving the bar. An idea suddenly pops into my head, and I begin to walk back to the warehouse.

 _At The Warehouse_

I walk through the corridors, before finally finding the shooting range. I take out my Beretta, unload it, before setting it down on the table. I then pick up the Colt Python, with a box full of ammo, load it, before holstering it.

I think I'm ready for my prize now.

* * *

 **A/N: So, I'm a little late, but I made this a bit longer just to satisfy you guys enough. I have tests all week, and had them all last week, so that's why I might be a bit slow on the updates. Anyway, if you liked this chapter, or have any feedback, please leave a review as it will be much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks For Reading!**


	10. Chapter 9: Tough Guy Facades

**Ugh, exams were too longgggggggg. But I'm back!**

 **Fillingtheemptyvoid, long time no see! Yes I added Billy Miller, figured he should be used as the mob boss, because why not? The Driver, thank you for nearly filling up a page of reviews xD. But seriously, thanks for the support. Ever since I did that Epilogue, I planned the events that took place in the three weeks before it, which I had to fill so this story could tie up any loose ends if I never did anything that contributed to that epilogue, which also explains Cartman's journey from a fat cunt who doesn't care to someone who has humanity. Nice list of movies, though I haven't seen half of them xD. I took the whole "one story at a time thing" from Christopher Nolan (favourite director), as it gives me more time to focus on stuff. My favourite character from South Park is Kenny, mainly because of his sex drive and his accounts on his ability to not die. About that question you accidentally posted, it's fine, and it's gone, so now people won't get confused. You have Wolverine claws? Lucky bastard. As for the KFC, with all the shit Cartman's going through, plus him working out now, I don't think he cares that much.**

 **Anyway, let's get back into the story!**

* * *

Cartman's PoV

I nervously walk through the warehouse, hoping that nobody would suspect anything, suspicious, about me tonight. Not many people stay late, so I guess that's reassuring. I look around me to see if anyone's batting an eye, before grabbing a set of keys from the key rack and unlocking a car. Eh, it's good enough I suppose.

"Hey! Kingston! Where do you think you're going at this time of the night?" I turn around to see Billy's smug face staring right at me.

"I've decided I'd like to take that offer that The Enforcer gave me." I calmly reply.

"Are you so sure about that? I mean, you seemed pretty -ahem-, disturbed about what happened back there." He says, moving closer.

"I'm fine, now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to have some fun." I'm about to step into the car but he grabs my arm, stopping me.

"Listen, you haven't seen much have you? Believe me, there is a lot worse in this business than a prostitute getting her brains blown out, got that? You should understand, when you enter this fray, you will see blood getting spilled, and you will be expected to spill some of your own in the process." He says, before letting go.

"Well, you have been working hard so far, so, have a good night." He says before walking away. I stare at him for a few seconds, before eventually entering the car. I managed to get my driver's license last fall, so I should know what I'm doing. I start the engine before leaving the warehouse, driving onto the main road. Let's see, where did he say their place was? A garment factory, about a block away from that old cinema. Kenny and Bebe had a lucky escape there, but not as lucky as when I was fucking beaten by that blonde psychotic motherfucker in that stadium. Man, that was embarrassing, and I wish Mysterion left me a piece for him. I wanted to beat the life out of that motherfucker.

Directions aren't a problem, since the cinema, along with the old Union Station, got absolutely fucked up last summer. The new Mayor hasn't exactly been enthusiastic about rebuilding some of the buildings destroyed, exceptions being made to the Clock Tower and the Station. Everything else, like the cinema, it's basically like a ghost building. The ruins just sit there, since all the rest of the money in the budget was used on the police force. Yeah, that went fucking well didn't it. Now you have gangs running the entire fucking city, and Denver's been a shithole ever since Mysterion decided to finally fuck off. Can't believe I'm saying it but I miss his wannabe Batman ass. Dude actually did something.

I turn into the street where the old cinema was, and I can tell why the government never thought of rebuilding this. This seems like one of the more, let's say, dirtier regions in the city. No wonder Kenny picked this cinema.

I drive around the block until I find the garment factory that dude was telling me about. The factory looks abandoned, but as soon as I pull up near it, about 6 people jump out from behind garbage bins and fences nearby.

"Ello, Sunshine! What are ye doing here?" A man with ragged clothes and dirty hair comes forward, aiming his own revolver at my face.

"I came here to collect a reward from The Enforcer, after I helped with a drug operation this afternoon with the Mob." I explain, with my hands up.

"Bollocks. Take him inside, lads. We don't want blood out on our front yard." He says to his men. They kick open the door before throwing me inside.

"Get on your knees." The gunman asks. I comply, but then I feel his revolver at the back of my head.

"You shouldn't have come here, y'know. Are you afraid of death?" He says.

"Go fuck yourself." I sternly reply.

"Well alright then." He says as he cocks his gun. Just at that moment, another man walks in, who I recognise from the deal.

"What the fuck are you guys doing?" He says.

"Hey, Glenn, man it's just standard protocol. He looked suspicious." The gunman pointing the revolver at my head suddenly goes nervous, shedding the gangster facade.

"Jack, is it? You here to collect that reward?" Glenn asks.

"Yeah, I am." I say.

"Ryan, put the gun down, and tell your men to back off and get back outside guarding." Glenn orders. The gun at the back of my head disappears, and I stand up, face to face with Glenn.

"Where's The Enforcer." I ask.

"Why do you ask?" Glenn replies.

"Before I take my, "reward", I have to ask him a few questions. Bil- I mean, The Boss sent me in his behalf." I lie.

"Well, in that case, follow me then." He says before ushering me out of the small, dark, entrance into the large, surprisingly non-factory like main room. It's kind of the same as the warehouse, except I don't remember seeing so many women in chains back there. Everywhere I look, I see them being whipped and forced into other doors that probably branch off from this room, into God-Knows-What.

"You see them skanks? They get forced into what we like to call, "fun rooms". Don't worry, you'll be heading there after this little meeting." Glenn explains as my eyes continue to explore. I see what they have done, they used this abandoned garment factory because it used to be delivering stuff, which would be a perfect cover for white vans coming in and out of the building, as evidenced from the ones coming in from the garage doors over on the right. Well, it seems like I know my escape route.

"Hey, Glenn, we need your help." A thug runs up to the two of us.

"What's the matter?" The skanks are making noise again, aren't they?" Shane asks.

"Yeah. They're fucking loud. We need your, um, "techniques" to shut them up." The thug explains.

"Damnit, alright, Jack, is it? Head straight ahead and make a right turn. You'll find The Enforcer's "crib", there." Glenn explains before walking off with the thug. Alrighty then. I continue walking, though I'm still trying to figuring out an escape route in my head. Let's see, after I do this, there might be some heat, so it seems like there is less men on the right, which when I come out will be the left, okay. Glenn went to the left as well, so him and his men might not come out for a while, which could give me some time. I keep mapping out a plan in my head until a conversation catches my attention.

"So, wait, we're gonna try and take out that mob?" I hear, a bit drowned out by the other noises though. I focus in on the conversation.

"Yeah, we've been planning this for months, and we're going to take out our rivals, so we can rule Denver's underworld." I keep listening.

"Jesus, this sounds like something outta New York."

"Yeah, well, since we know about them because of our, "deals", we know that they mainly get their weapons from this French dude. Real crazy motherfucker, carries around a shovel." Oh shit, they're gonna take out Mole.

"So, when are we attacking them?"

"In about a week or so. Then we take out the mob, and their dumbass kid leader, and everything goes golden." They finish their conversation. That's, interesting. They're going to have a gang war in Denver, Jesus. Should I tell them, or should I let them kill each other so I can focus on finding my mother. Yeah, I'll do that. I might warn Mole though…

I take the directions that Glenn told me, and I find myself outside this gold plated door.

"Oh, Jesus." I mutter before knocking. I stand there for a minute, before noticing a camera in the corner of the corridor. It moves towards me, and just, stays there for a second, before quickly snapping back forward as the door automatically unlocks.

"Have a seat, Mr Kingston." The Enforcer says, with his back turned to what looks like… a painting of heads… lovely.

"Fancy." I say. He suddenly turns around as I take a seat.

"I was informed you had some questions on behalf of The Boss." He says.

"Yeah, I do." I move my hand closer to my holster. Luckily, he doesn't seem to notice.

"Well, ask away." He says, leaning back.

"On the night of Christmas Eve, were you in the town of South Park?" I ask.

"And why does Billy Miller want to know that?" He says, taking me by surprise.

"You know his name…" I say, remembering how Billy said he keeps it a secret.

"Of course I do, he used to be one of us." He says.

"Were you in South Park, yes or no." I ask again, becoming a bit more impatient.

"I don't know why you decided to join his "mob". Funny name, I thought a mob would have some power, or at least, act like they do." He says.

"Some buffoon spilled your whole plan, I know what you're going to do." I say.

"Well, isn't that, unexpected." He says, and I notice how he slowly moves his arm to the edge of the table. At this moment I whip out my revolver, cock it, and aim it at his head.

"Listen, bub, I don't really give a shit about Billy's posse of posers, I want to know one thing: Where, Is, Liane, Cartman?" I threaten. I notice his facial expression turn from smug, to slightly concerned. Suddenly, he swiftly moves his hand from the surface of the table to under it, but I act quickly and I shoot his hand before he can aim his own at me.

"I'll take that as an answer to my first question. So, you know who she is." I stand up as he grabs his hand in pain. I move around the desk before whacking him with my pistol, and aiming it at his head yet again.

"Is she alive?" I growl.

"You think I'm scared of death? Come on, big man, do it. End me." He says, confidently.

"Gosh you are so naive." I say before moving the gun to his crotch and firing twice. He yells out in pain as I focus the revolver on his head again.

"ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION. IS SHE ALIVE?" I yell in his ear.

"Yes! Gah! S-she's alive!" He cries.

"Where is she? WHERE?!" I say, forcing the gun on his forehead.

"She's, she's not here, okay? She was delivered t-to the Overlord, it was h-him who told us to kidnap her! I swear!" He pleads.

"Where do I find this, Overlord?" I ask.

"Nobody has ever seen him, okay? We just left the van containing her back at our previous meet up point and it was gone the next day, okay? I don't know where she is!" He grabs his crotch in pain.

"You know, you just fucked yourself kid, there's going to be at least 3 people with fully automatics that will burst through that door in the next minute." He says.

"Yeah, I know." I say, before forcing the gun into his mouth.

"You know, back at that meeting you acted like such a hard nut. Look at yourself now. You're pathetic." I say before pulling the trigger. His brains spill out onto the floor, as I hear footsteps becoming increasingly louder. I take out my box of ammo and quickly reload my revolver until all 6 chambers are filled with bullets.

"Come on then, you sick motherfuckers."

* * *

 **A/N: Cliffhanger! So, now that I'm no longer studying for exams, I will probably be returning to regular updates for this fanfiction. Hooray! Anyway, if you liked this chapter, or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as that would be much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks For Reading!**


	11. Chapter 10: An Eventful Evening

**So, I changed my name, I wonder if anyone caught that before reading this. ;)**

 **So, half the chapters of my previous story MORE reviews? That's awesome! Thank you so much for that!**

 **Driver, or should I call you Hawaiian now? Congrats on the new account, and I hope your story is fantastic! Trying the claws is still lucky too! Logan in Black and White? That sounds so fucking awesome. MikeTorenno, don't worry, I won't be tolerating any flaming wars unless I trigger them voluntarily! Smarvin, welcome back! I figured I would like to tell the story from criminal's point of view, but still tell an origin story. Peter Griffin, Billy might be more involved than you think… Filling, I don't really like sidekicks that much, so probably not. Toolshed and Human Kite you can pretty much confirm, but I'm not doing that in the near future. As for you, Samanosuke and Hawaiian, Mysterion VS Coon might be a thing, except, not really a VS story…. And Cell, um, how lovely?**

 **But anyway, onwards with the chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

Cartman's PoV

The footsteps grow louder and louder, until they door is kicked open and 3 men with shotguns enter. I quickly shoot one in the head and another in the shoulder. I duck down behind The Enforcer's desk just in time before the unscathed gunman fires at my previous position, which just barely misses me. I notice that there is a Beretta M9 right next to me, so I pick it up. I don't have much time as that gunman will likely walk around the desk, so I quickly jump up and fire both my revolver and the Beretta, killing the remaining two men.

"What the fuck was that?!" I hear in the distance. Oh, shit that's bad. I holster my revolver and grab a shotgun, before dashing out of the room. I shoot my way through the twisting corridors, covering the walls with red until I find myself in the main room. A group of gunmen spot me, so I quickly shoot as many as I can before diving in cover behind a van. Holy fucking shit, how am I alive?

Suddenly, someone appears around the corner, but I luckily reflex shoot him in the head, killing him.

"Surround him!" I hear a familiar voice. It's that asshole that I met when I arrived here. What's his name, Ryan? What a douchebag.

Wait a minute, I'm crouched down, behind a van door. Oh, and would you look at that, the keys are inside and the door's unlocked. These criminals are so fucking dumb. I quickly hop in and reverse, knocking down the guys that were behind the van. I glance around the room, before noticing a garage door that's half open. Good enough for me. I step on the pedal, hard, knocking down another few guys before crashing through the garage door, onto the road.

I look into the mirror to realise that I'm quickly followed by three other cars, so I take a sharp turn and head right back into the main city, as I might be able to lose them there. I overtake numerous cars, including many close shaves with other drivers, but I'm alright so far. I look at the rear mirror again, but it's suddenly shot off, and I frantically spin the steering wheel, dodging the incoming fire from the gangsters behind me. I look to the right to see a police car heading straight towards me. I shift gears and slam on the accelerator as I barely miss the car, glancing behind me to see a gangster car get T-Boned. Well, at least the police have some use.

I zig zag between more cars and I take a sharp left at the city centre, as now both cops and crooks chase me through the streets. I look at the other rear view mirror, and it seems I have grown a few car lengths in distance, mainly because of the police interference.

Suddenly I see a police blockade, but I also notice an alleyway that might be wide enough to allow me through. I make it seem that I'm driving straight through the blockade, but I suddenly turn into the alleyway, catching the cops that are behind me off guard, as they slam into one of the buildings that make up the alleyway. I look behind me, smiling with glee as I realise I'm safe. For now anyway.

Well, let's see, I obviously can't head back to South Park, and I don't think it's a good idea to head back to the Warehouse. I mean, I technically do owe this guy, and I know where he is, but he may not be on the friendliest of sides… Oh, and he would appreciate that warning.

I try to remember where the directions are, until I finally find myself on familiar streets, before pulling up into the U-Stor-It alley. I pull up in front of the storage units, and suddenly one opens and 5 gunmen step out. Oh, not again.

"Out of the van!" One orders, and I slowly comply. I carefully reach behind me, and one of them aims their weapon at me.

"I'm dropping my weapons." I assure them.

"Oh no, you won't be doing zat." I hear the familiar French voice, as the former mercenary walks out of the storage unit, ending up right in front of me.

"You will keep your hands behind your back, while we take ze weapons from you. Where are they?" The Mole asks.

"Revolver holstered on my waist, and a shotgun is in the van." I say, placing my hands on my head. Two gunmen come and search me for any more weapons, and retrieve the ammo box that I also had. They also thoroughly search the van, including the back. Luckily there isn't any near-naked girls in there.

"Guys, lower your guns. As for you, Jack, isn't it? Follow me." Mole says. He leads me back to his own storage unit, and grabs a TV remote. He flicks through some channels before reaching the news, where the high speed chase I was involved in is dominating the local headlines.

"Now what ze fuck were you even thinking? You pissed off not only ze cops, but another fucking mob? You are one stoopid beetch aren't you?" Mole scoffs.

"I was more focused on finding out more information on my mother's location than trying to go all Fast and Furious." I say sarcastically.

"Zis is a motherfucking Colt Python revolver, now what ze fuck were you doing that you required one of these?" Mole asks pulling out the revolver I stole.

"Interrogation." I reply.

"Who were you interrogating?" He asks.

"The Enforcer, one of the douchebags who runs that stupid human trafficking mob." I reply.

"Oh, please don't tell me you did what I think you did." He says.

"He was close to crying before I blew his brains out." I smirk. Mole facepalms immediately, sure he laughs a bit but I think it's in an "gosh you are fucking stupid" kind of way.

"Gosh are you fucking stoopid. You do realise zat your mob is fucked, you know zat? It. Is. FUCKED!" He says, waving his arms around.

"I frankly never gave a shit about those glue-sniffing assholes. As I said, I'm only in it to find my mother." I say.

"And 'ow is zat going? What did you get out of ze poor bastard?" He asks.

"Not much, except she's being kept by this dude called The Overlord, and even he doesn't know where he could possibly be." I say.

"Ze Overlord? You mean ze insane, nobody 'as ever seen, Overlord? Every fucking day you live seems to lower your fucking IQ!" He says as I just roll my eyes.

"One more question." He says, before suddenly pointing the revolver at my head.

"Why ze fuck did you 'ave to come 'ere?" He asks.

"I figured, that I owe you after you got mauled by guard dogs all those years ago." I say.

"Okay, aaaand?" He says, moving an inch closer.

"The Enforcer was planning to wage war on my old mob." I say.

"Okay, and what ze fuck does that 'ave to do with me?" He says.

"He was planning to launch an attack on this place, in an effort to wipe out the mob's main weapons supply, which seems to come from you people." I reveal. As soon as I finish my sentence, Christophe's eyes widen and throws my revolver in frustration. I casually pick it back up and holster it, because I don't think he seems to be noticing.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! THESE MOTHERFUCKERS THINK ZAT THEY CAN FUCKING SCREW ME OVER LIKE I'M SOME WORTHLESS CUNT! THOSE PREECKS WILL FUCKING PAY IF THEY EVEN FUCKING DARE TO ATTACK ZIS PLACE, I WILL FUCKING BURN THEIR WORTHLESS BODIES TO ZE GROUND IF THEY EVEN FUCKING TRIED! WORTHLESS, WOMEN ABUSING, PATHETIC, CUNTS!" He rants for a few minutes before finally calming down.

"FUCK!" Or not. He sighs as he sits down on his chair, and begins to stroke his shovel.

"When ze fuck will they try zis?" He asks.

"In about, a week or so from now, I think." I answer.

"Damnit, okay so zis means that we 'ave some time to set up some defenses, and possibly to test a few inventions of my own." He says.

"Wait a minute, did you just say, we?" I ask curiously.

"Yes I said we you fucking buffoon. Now come on, follow me I want to show you a few things." He says, leaping from his chair before escorting me from his unit. I follow him around for a few minutes before he opens up a smaller unit. Inside are a bunch of cloaks and fabrics.

"Now, I 'ave been testing zis for a while now, and I think that I have just made a fabric that is both bulletproof and fireproof." He shows me the fabrics before picking up a nice blood red coloured fabric.

"Zis has been ze most successful, and it is made out of a fabricated version of Kevlar." He says before setting it down. He ushers me to another storage unit. He opens it, revealing a load of armour.

"Zis is my homemade bulletproof armour. I used parts from old military stuff after I found a convoy that was attacked back in my days as a mercenary." He says. The chest piece is mostly dark grey, minus the thick white stripe down the middle. He closes the storage unit and then forces me onwards to another one. He opens it, revealing a set of gloves.

"I once tried to make gloves zat would 'ave hidden blades under ze wrists, just like in Assassin's Creed, however, I couldn't find a big enough blade zat would work with ze contraption zat I built, so instead, I made a miniaturised contraption zat is embedded into ze gloves' fingertip compartments, essentially making claws. I used some of ze finest and hardest metals available, so these claws wouldn't break. They are also 100% retractable, and works via senses in your muscles." He says, trying a glove on. Suddenly, small, but sharp claws pop out of each fingertip, with a noise that goes -SNIKT-. I have to admit, that's pretty fucking cool. I look around, until a vehicle catches my attention.

"Hey Christophe, what's that over there?" I ask, gazing at what seems to be an armoured car over at a larger storage unit.

"Zat? Zat's a prototype vehicle zat I found with ze military convoy. I describe it as an all terrain vehicle, with large armoured plating covering most of ze main body. Even with it's large wheels it can make sharp turns with speeds of up to 60mph, but it still needs some work with the engine, and I need to get ze computer inside of it fixed. But yeah, it's a badass looking car." He explains.

"It has a computer inside of it?" I ask.

"It's a military grade prototype, of course it has something like zis." He says. Suddenly, gunshots are heard from the very front of the storage alley, and Mole stares at me furiously.

"YOU TOLD ME ZAT THEY WOULD BE 'ERE IN A WEEK!" He shouts.

"I swear, that's what I hear from their members themselves! But, maybe, if they know who I am and that I'm part of the mob… oh no, because of what I did they have a reason to wage war. Shit!" I realise my mistake.

"Fuck! I assume you know how to shoot?" He asks me.

"Yeah, I have an idea." I say cocking my revolver.

"You know what, while you're at it, you can test these gloves, see if they were worth my time." He hands me the gloves. I holster my revolver and slip the gloves on.

"Remember, it senses your muscles." He says. I then figure out how to unsheathe them, by flicking my wrists, causing the claws to come out.

-SNIKT-

* * *

 **A/N: Sorry folks, but the battle will have to be done in the next chapter! But at least we finally have the claws! Anyway, if you liked this chapter or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as that would be much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	12. Chapter 11: Claws

**Early Post? Whaaaaaaaaaa?**

 **001, Logan: Noir looks fucking awesome! Thank you for the feedback on how I introduced the claws and suit and stuff. As for the story's length, I have definitely decided that this wouldn't be shorter than either Mysterion or Mysterion Returns, because I feel I still have so much more to work with right now. Hell, I might have more chapters than those two stories if I don't go completely all out like the last two stories' final chapters. Rhi Rhi, thanks for the review and the feedback! Smarvin, don't worry, I've been rewatching some scenes from Logan, just like I did before I wrote that really gory chapter, so, expect, well, something.**

 **But anyway, back to the claws and blood!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

Cartman's PoV

"Where are zhese motherfuckers?" Mole shakes one of his henchmen.

"They're at the entrance, there's about 4 cars packed with gangsters, most carrying fully auto, and there's probably more on the way." He replies as Mole seizes his shovel, and also a shotgun.

"You know how to handle one of zhese? Because zhose claws won't be much good from long range." Mole says, handing me an assault rifle and a couple of magazines.

"You have about 90 rounds of ammo, so make every shot count, okay? Aim for ze head and ze torso, because if zhey take over we are fucked and you won't be finding your mommy, got zat?" Christophe says.

"Yeah, now let's kick these fuckers' asses!" I reply, as we run out into the battlefield. We duck behind a couple of vans for cover, and I begin to get the hang of this rifle. I kill a few guys, but about 3 more cars full of reinforcements push us back to the main storage units.

"If zhey get too close to ze merchandise, zhey might destroy it, or even worse, use zhem against us! So, cover me!" Mole says as we dive behind a couple of wooden crates. The Mole begins to move to cover closer to the attackers, and uses his shotgun on one guy who came to close, going under him and blasting half of the dude's face off. He then kneecaps another guy and bludgeons him in the head with his shovel, as I pick off a few guys that spot him, but the attack continues nonetheless.

Suddenly, I'm found out by one of the gangsters, but my reflexes are quick and I shoot him in the hand, but my first magazine is out of ammo. Instead of taking the time to reload…

- _SNIKT-_

I pop my claws and slash at the thug's lower leg, causing blood to splatter across the crates I'm hiding behind. I then slash at his face, killing him.

"Holy, fuck.." I say as I look at the mess of blood I just caused, on the body, floor and on my new claws, but I can't relax for long, as more men have barged into the storage unit, pushing us back further again.

"Damnit, what happened to covering me?" Mole says as he limps back, revealing he was grazed in the leg.

"I was occupied." I say, pointing to the mess of a corpse at my previous cover position, before I help Mole to the very back of the units, where we hide behind a few pickup trucks and other vehicles. I load another magazine into my rifle, before unloading on a few more attackers.

"Damnit, we're pinned down! Do you zhink you can get ze angle on zhem?" Mole asks. I peep my head out of cover for a few seconds, noticing a bunch of guys hiding behind some crates, which I might be able to reach if I sneak behind some of the other vehicles scattered across the area.

"Alright, I might have an idea, but you have to cover me." I tell Mole. He nods, before swap my assault rifle with his shotgun. I then sprint across from cover to behind another vehicle, as Christophe picks off the guy that was shooting at me as I ran. Okay, if I do that two more times I might be able to be the drop on them. I slide over the roof of the car I'm hiding behind before running again, as Mole covers me. I arrive behind a few crates, and I can now see the 4 gunmen that are hiding behind those crates. Okay, one more time… I run from the crates to the enemy's cover, taking them by surprise by stabbing one in the back and slitting his throat, blasting half of another guy's head off with the shotgun, and slashing another gunman's face. I turn to see the fourth gunman with his rifle already raised but he's suddenly shot in the head, and collapses onto the pool of blood already here.

I use the fallen's rifle to gun down a few more gangsters now that I have the angle on them, and the plan seems to have worked because they start to move back. Christophe joins me in moving back up to the crates as I slash at some guys that are still on the ground that are alive, but wounded. Mole bludgeons a few more guys with his shovel before hiding behind some more crates.

"Cover me this time." He says to me before yet again, pushing forward, killing a bunch of dudes, moving in and out of cover. I move up with him, but keeping some distance behind, even sneaking up on one dude and ripping out a piece of his torso with the claws. Suddenly, Mole gets tackled by a dude armed with a knife, so I quickly aim the rifle at his head, but it's out of ammo. As Christophe is pinned down on the ground, holding back the gangster's knife with his shovel, it might be too late if I pull out my revolver, so I leap from cover and tackle the gangster, slashing his face with my claws before pulling Mole back to cover. We exchange looks briefly before we are once again under fire. I whip out my revolver, and together, along with the rest of The Mole's gang behind us, we push the thugs back to the entrance.

I duck behind my van, picking off another few guys, before finding yet another spot where I can sneak up on a dude. I run over to him and stick my claws in the side of his neck, dropping him to the ground. Suddenly, I get a blow to the back of my head, making me collapse to the ground. I look up, seeing a smiling thug with a baseball bat in his left hand, and a pistol in his right, aimed at my face, but at that moment I hear someone screaming from the right.

"YEARGHHH!" All of a sudden the thug is blindsided by the Mole, who whacks him in the head with his shovel, before thrusting it down on his throat, which ends up decapitating him. Holy fuck, dude! He turns around and nods, before swinging his shovel, causing the blood from the edge of it to spray into an incoming gunman's eyes. I take the opportunity to leap onto him, stabbing him in the chest, before swiftly moving up.

As we all do our bit to kill as many as we can, the thugs finally come to their senses and begin to retreat. The survivors dash to their cars, before speeding off, hopefully far away from this place as they could get.

The ones on our side cheer and raise their guns in victory, as the Mole rests his blood-covered shovel on his shoulder.

"Holy fucking sheet!" Christophe exclaims, looking around the blood-filled battlefield that we remain in.

"Yeah, that was fucking intense." I say, gazing at the sheer amount of blood on my claws.

"I mean we fucking killed everyone! Look at zhis! Zhis is fucking amazing! Terrifying, but amazing!" Mole says, walking past some thugs' corpses.

"As for zhose claws, do you zhink that zhey were good?" He asks.

"Oh, you have no fucking idea. Like, they slice through human flesh like butter." I tell him. I take them off, and I try to hand them back to him, but he shakes his head.

"Non. You should keep zhem, hell, you can make zhem fucking work, so why ze fuck not? Besides, it's not like every other mob in the city is trying to get at your ass, plus ze cops." He says as we walk through one of the storage units that we hid in.

"Oh, and based on zhis alone, you can definitely join up with my group. I might be able to help with your mother, but it could take some time considering how little information we know about zhis Overlord douchebag." He says. I notice he is still slightly limping.

"Hey, is your leg okay?" I ask him.

"It'll be fine. Zhose fuckers only grazed it, besides, I saw you take a hefty hit with zhat baseball bat. You sure you don't have a concussion or something?" He asks, slightly concerned.

"I'm fine, didn't even hurt that much. So, with all these assholes attacking your place, what are you going to do?" I ask.

"Well, I'm thinking it would be a bad idea to attack zhem head on. Besides, if you can get in and out, maybe you can help me with zhis problem, to settle zhis debt. I mean, if we get the bulletproof armour on you, you'll be golden for zhese jobs." He says.

"Absolutely, because I might even find some information on my mother as well." I say, eagerly.

"Oh yes, zhat is great too. Anyway, now that you are a part of us, I'm sorry about zhis, but there is no way you can live here like you did back at zhat warehouse. I mean, I might be able to set something up but only for a week or so, so you'll have to find somewhere." He says, to my dismay.

"Alright, that might be a problem, but I'll think of something.. I think…" I reply.

"Well, anyway, I can give you a car, maybe it can make it a bit easier to get around." Mole says.

"Thanks Christophe, for everything." I say.

"No problem." He says before heading off to check on the rest of his men.

* * *

 _10 Days Later / January 25th_

"That will be $49.99, please." The cashier asks. I hand them a $50 note. Finally, I got some new clothes to replace the ones I've been wearing for like, three weeks straight.

"Thank you for stopping with us, Sir!" She says before I leave the counter. I don't see where I'm going and I end up bumping into someone and they drop their handbag.

"Oh, sorry about that, let me help you." I say. I pick up the handbag and I hand it to the woman who- oh fuck no, no, NO, FUCK!

"Thank you- wait, is that, is that you, Eric?" Suddenly I'm face to face with Heidi Turner, and fuck she recognised me. I casually storm out of the shop, pretending it never happened, but I look behind me, AND SHE'S STILL FUCKING THERE.

"Eric!" She calls out, but I continue walking down the street, maybe a little faster than usual. I turn around again and- SHE'S RUNNING!

"Eric, don't you fucking dare!" She rushes up to me and grabs my arm before I can walk away.

"What the fuck are you doing here? You need to get back to South-" I cut her off mid-sentence.

"SHH!" I say, before pulling her into an alleyway.

"Okay, Eric, what is going on, why are you acting so fucking weird? You know how many people are worried for you?" Heidi says.

"I'm not going back there." I say firmly.

"And why the fuck not?!" Her facial expression goes from surprised to see me to fucking pissed. Before I answer though, a van pulls up near the alley way, and- oh, this is just fucking great!

"Well look who it is. The boys will be happy that I brought Jack Kingston's head!" The Man says. Fuck, I remember who he is.

"Jack? What the fuck is he talking about?" Heidi asks me.

"Enough with the bad boy act, "Ryan", because I know you're a fuckboy in reality." I spit back.

"You know, I should have buried you when you first came to our place!" He says.

"Heidi, don't watch this." I warn her.

"What's going on Eric?" She asks me, concerned.

"Just, don't watch!" I say as I suddenly pop my claws as Ryan grabs his pistol. I manage to stab him in the chest, but with his last breath he shoots me in the stomach, before dropping dead.

"FUCK!" I yell out, before retracting the claws.

"Holy shit! Eric! Oh my God…" Heidi says as I drop to my knees. She rushes towards me, trying to catch me as I collapse to the ground.

"Eric, you killed that man.. you got fucking shot…" Heidi says as everything starts becoming dizzy.

"D-Don't take me back, please, don't take me back…." Are my last words before everything turns to black.

* * *

 **A/N: Shit is getting real now! Heidi Turner now knows that Cartman is in Denver, so what kind of impact will this have? Find out in the next chapter. Anyway, if you liked this chapter, or have any feedback in general, please leave a review as that would be much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	13. Chapter 12: Lost and Found

**I'm Back!**

 **001, thank you for the reviews! I love writing the actions scenes and I'm glad that you enjoyed them. I am indeed proud that this story has the most reviews than any others. How is this possible? Because you're just a madman xD. But seriously, I greatly appreciate the reviews that have been posted to this story, it has been truly amazing. As for what happens, you'll find out right now! To the Guest, thank you for leaving the review, and I'm glad that trolls haven't fucked me over, so, yeah, I'm proud of that.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _Later That Night_

Cartman's PoV

I finally begin to regain consciousness, slowly opening my eyes as a bright light is the only thing I see. My eyes slowly adjust to the room, as the light starts to fade and I find myself looking at a wooden ceiling. Hmm, this doesn't look like a house from South Park, well, not from one that I would know, anyway.

I look to the right to see a table with what seems to be a bunch of, well, hospital-like tools, all set on top of a blood stained cloth.

I then turn to the left and-

"Gah! Fuck!" I'm jump-scared by the face of Heidi Turner, staring directly at me.

"Oh, did I scare you?" She asks.

"Yeah, you sort of did." I groan as I try and sit up, but I feel a pain in my stomach. I cry out and Heidi jumps from her chair and slowly helps me to lean back. At this point, I realise I'm lying down on a bed.

"No, no, don't try, you need to rest for a while." She says.

"Fuck, sake, are we in South Park?" I ask, groggy.

"No, no, we're just outside of Denver in my Grandma's house." She says, and I sigh with relief. Then I remember that she saw me kill someone before I slipped into unconsciousness… shit.

"I bet you've got questions." I ask.

"Oh you have no idea." She says before pulling out a notebook.

"Let's see, which one should I ask first…" She mumbles to herself as she scans her list of questions.

"Ah, let's start with the obvious one." She says.

"What the fuck were you doing in Denver?!" She shouts.

"Believe me, it was by choice." I say, rubbing my ringing eardrum.

"Well, why were you in Denver instead of at FUCKING, HOME." She says.

"Let's see, my mother's missing, Kenny kicked me out after I got him suspended, the police didn't give a shit about my mother disappearing since they gave up after only 2 weeks, oh, and people think I killed her myself. I don't think I was wanted back at South Park, so why the fuck not?" I say before sighing.

"Only Craig thinks you killed her, and Kenny has regretted kicking you out, and everyone is worried sick for you." Heidi says.

"I just, can't go back, not now, it's too late to go back. Have I answered you question with enough fucking detail then?" I say.

"I suppose. Alright, next question. Why the fuck did you stab a dude to death with fucking claws?!" She says.

"He tried to kill me, you were fucking there for God sake!" I say.

"I didn't think claws would pop out of your gloves and you would stab the dude to death!" Heidi says.

"Where did you even get them?" She asks, confused.

"Well, funny story actually- wait, has an angry French guy been calling my phone?" I ask.

"Um, yeah.." She says, handing me my phone. I check the screen: 12 missed calls. Oh, fuck.

"He called once and started screaming so, I ignored his number all the other times.." She says.

"Oh, fuck.." I say before calling his number. It rings for a while before he finally picks up.

"Cartman, is zat you?" He asks.

"Yeah, yeah it's me, I just got shot. An old friend is helping me." I say.

"Old friend? Someone from South Park?" He asks.

"Yeah, you might know her from the old Resistance when we were kids." I explain.

"Hmm, Wendy?" He asks,

"No." I reply.

"Bebe?" He asks.

"No." I reply.

"Stan?" He asks.

"You have a point, but no." I laugh.

"Then who ze fuck is it?" He asks.

"Heard of a girl named Heidi?" I say.

"Yeah. I zhink so. Is she asking questions?" He asks.

"Um, yeah." I say, glancing at her.

"Hmm, should I kill her?" He asks.

"What, no! God no!" I reply in shock.

"Hmm, mkay. How long do you zhink you'll be out of ze game?" He asks.

"Hmm, I don't know." I say. I then turn to to Heidi.

"How long will it take for me to heal?" I ask.

"You'll have to ask my grandma." She replies.

"I can't say right now." I tell Mole.

"Alright. Keep in touch, and I'll keep searching for somezhing on your mother." He says before hanging up. I drop the phone and sigh.

"Just asking, who was that?" Heidi asks.

"Do you remember La Resistance back in like, 3rd or 4th Grade?" I ask her.

"Um, I think so." She says.

"Well, do you remember that crazy French dude?" I say and her eyes suddenly widen.

"The fucking Mole? That was the fucking Mole?" She asks.

"Yeah, the psychotic, dangerous, delusional fucking Mole." I laugh.

"I still have so many questions.." She says, and she reaches for her notebook but I stop her.

"Do you just want to hear the full story?" I say.

"I think that would make things more simpler." She replies.

"Alright, um, okay. After Kenny kicked me out, packed my belongings in that backpack on the floor. By the way did you find a revolver in there with the rest of my shit?" I ask her.

"Um, yeah, that kind of freaked me out.." She says.

"Okay, moving forward. Anyway, after packing my stuff I took the next bus to Denver, and I spent the night on the streets. The next morning I went to a nearby Starbucks and formed my new alias: Jack Kingston." I explain.

"So that's why that guy called you Jack?" She asks.

"Yes. Anyway, I ended up meeting these two mobsters there, Jeremy and Geoff, and they needed a guy to do this, drugs deal or something. Since I saw my mother get taken by a bunch of thug looking guys, I figured that this may be my way into this sort of network, where I can find her. Anyway, after doing the deal, and a couple more deals, I found out about this human trafficker called The Enforcer, and figured that he might know where my mother is. So, a couple of weeks ago, I found where this dude was, and interrogated him-"

"Did you kill him?" She cuts me off, looking worried. I sigh for a second, before finally replying.

"Yes, I did, but believe me, if you saw what he was doing, you would have done it yourself." I assure her. It makes her feel a bit better, but not by that much.

"Anyway, after I, um, killed him, I escaped his little base by the skin of my teeth, and ended up at The Mole's place. He's a weapons dealer now, and he ended up giving me those deadly gloves when a bunch of assholes from that mob, who's leader or something I killed, tried to demolish the place. Mole and I, along with a bunch of Mole's gang, wiped the floor with those assholes and liberated the entire place of them. So, after that, he let me keep the gloves, and let me have a place in his gang." I explain further.

"Are you going to betray him like you did with your other mob?" Heidi asks.

"Of course not. Christophe is helping me search for my mother, and in exchange, I help him with some problems of his own, such as slowly getting back at the assholes who attacked us. Besides, I saw him decapitate someone with his shovel once, so there is no way in hell that I'm going to double cross him." I say.

"God, you got yourself into some deep shit while you were away." Heidi says.

"Yeah, I did." I reply.

"Those gloves, how do they work?" She asks.

"Hmm, well, hand them to me." I request, however, she's not that confident to hand them back.

"The last time I saw these, they were inside someone's chest." She says, reluctant.

"I'm not gonna kill you, dumbass hippie." I snort. She sighs before tossing me my bag, where my new clothes, my revolver, my food, water, money, and finally, gloves are. I take one out and put it on in front of her.

"Alright, so, The Mole told me they had sensors or something, so when I fleet my fingers or wrist or hand or something, they pop out, like, this!"

- _SNIKT_ -

"So, you can pop them and retract them whenever you want?" Heidi asks.

"Yeah." I say, placing the glove back into the bag.

"That's cool, but still creepy." Heidi says.

"Ah, the patient is finally awake?" Suddenly an old lady in a wheelchair. Her disability doesn't seem to affect her personality, as she has a warm smile on her wrinkly face.

"Oh, right, forgot to introduce you to my Grandma, Cyndie." Heidi points to the lady, who has moved next to the table of medical tools.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs Turner." I say as she packs the tools in a bag of hers.

"You too, Eric. Might I say, you were in quite a bad shape when Heidi dragged you in here." She says.

"You dragged me from that alleyway? How did nobody see you?" I ask Heidi, shocked.

"Well, my car was just around the corner so I decided to pull you over the fencing behind us, where you were shot, and managed to get you round that corner just before the cops showed up. By the time they were around that corner, you were already in the back seat of my car and I drove out of Denver towards here." Heidi explains.

"If it wasn't for her I might not have been able to save your life." Cyndie says.

"Wow, thank you, the both of you." I say, surprised.

"It's nothing really. I've dealt with far worse wounds back in the war." Cyndie says.

"Wait, war?" I ask.

"She was a nurse in World War II, and in the Vietnam War, and she's told me stories about some of the injuries she has had to deal with." Heidi explains.

"The bullet pierced just below your stomach, and luckily it didn't come out the other side of your body, because of what Heidi has told me, you were shot from point blank range, and if they penetrated your spine you would be paralysed for life, at best." Cyndie explains.

"Consider yourself lucky." Heidi says.

"Anyway, it's getting late, so I'm heading off to bed. I think you need some sleep too, young lady, it's a school night!" Cyndie says before wheeling off, leaving Heidi and I alone again.

"Well, I better get to bed." Heidi turns but I stop her.

"Wait! It's my turn to ask some questions." I say.

"Umm, alright, what do you want to know?" She asks.

"First thing's first, why are you living with your Grandma, and not your parents." I ask. Heidi's eyes suddenly blink numerous times and begin to fill up with tears.

"Well, um, my, um Dad was killed when a restaurant collapsed, and he was crushed by a falling piece of roof. And, my Mom, s-she was outside the Union Station during the first Chaos attack. She, she barely survived the explosion, and, um, she's been in a coma for nearly 7 months now." Heidi explains, wiping away a tear.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked." I say. Heidi looks at me, a bit confused, but shrugs it off. That's weird..

"Any other questions?" Heidi asks.

"Yeah, how's things going back home?" I ask.

"Well, other than everyone freaking out about you disappearing, life's been pretty normal. Kenny's still playing hero to bullied children, Kyle's still the smartest kid in school, closely followed by Wendy, Stan's the star football player every game, Clyde's still with that slut Rebecca, Craig and Tweek are still gay for each other, oh and Kenny and Bebe still sneak out of class to have sex in the toilets. Same old, same old." Heidi explains.

"I suppose so.. okay, final question, I promise." I say.

"Alright, shoot." She replies.

"Are you going to tell anyone about this, about why I ran away, about where I am, about the mob, about the crime, about the murder. Are you going to tell anyone?" I ask. She thinks about it for a minute, before finally coming up with a response.

"If it means so much to you, then I won't say a word." She says.

"Really?" I ask.

"I promise." She replies.

'Thank you, for everything." I say.

"It's fine. By the way, if you need a place to stay, I'm sure Grandma will let you stay here for as long as you need." She offers.

"Really? Thank you. I can help around the house if you need me to, when I'm healed of course.

"Thanks. Anyway, it's getting late, goodnight, Eric." She says.

"Goodnight Heidi."

* * *

 **A/N: Alrighty, it's midnight as I'm writing this final bit, yeesh. If you liked this chapter or have any feedback, please leave a review as that would be greatly appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	14. Chapter 13: A New Home

**Usually this starting line has something, interesting or, welcoming on it, but now I've got nothing, like, this could be really boring… oh wait.**

 **School's basically no problem for me anymore, it's just, fucking writer's block has struck me again, so if this chapter isn't really that good, well, I wouldn't be surprised. Might as well try.**

 **But HOLY FUCK, 100 REVIEWS! THAT'S AMAZING!**

 **I wouldn't have been able to reach this milestone without your support, so thank you!**

 **001, (I'm beginning to think you're some secret agent since I keep using this as your name, xD), thank you for the review, as always, and I agree, it was nice to settle down for at least one chapter, especially after the last few had a crap ton of action in it. As for the tie ins to Mysterion Returns, well, you know, gotta have those references or people might forget that this is in the same universe. Also, Ric122 was some old annoyance, but we are neutral now. Speaking of which, Guest, thank you for congratulating me over 100 reviews, and Ric actually never sock-puppeted any of my stories, and we're neutral right now. needs Jesus though, yeah, he's a cunt.**

 **Anyway, back to the story!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

Heidi's PoV

"D-Don't take me back, please, don't take me back…." Eric's eyes roll back in his head as he closes them, and he falls into unconsciousness.

"Cartman… CARTMAN?!" I scream as I shake him violently.

"Wake up, dammit!" I say.

"Oh, fuck!" I say as the van blocking the alleyway quickly speeds off. I take a look at the man, dead, laying on a pool of his own blood. How? What? Why? I have so many fucking questions. But the thought dominating my mind was Cartman stabbing that dude to death. Why did he call him Jack, when his name is Eric? What was Cartman doing in the middle of Denver? Why did he disappear without a trace? What the fuck is going on?!

Then, suddenly, I hear a faint noise in the distance.

- _WEEEOOOOWEEEOOOO_ -

Fuck, I recognise that sound! Some bastard must have heard that shot, and called the fucking cops! My car is just around that corner though...

I carefully remove Eric's gloves before stuffing them in his rucksack, along with the bag of new clothes that he had. I then grab him by his arms, and begin to drag him out of the alleyway. Fuck sake, he looks different but he's still quite fucking heavy! And the sirens are getting closer, shit! I just about pull him around the corner, and onto the main road. God, I hope nobody sees this. I open the back door and place him inside, before quickly closing it and rushing to the driver's seat as the sirens become deafening. I rev the engine and stomp on the pedal before driving off, looking into the alleyway to see cops checking out the body. Wow, that was a close one.

I take the fastest route to my grandma's house before pulling up into her driveway.

"GRANDMA! THERE'S SOMEONE IN MY CAR, HE'S BEEN SHOT!" I shout out before opening the back door and dragging Cartman outside.

"Oh dear! Well, come on then, get him inside!" She shouts back before holding the door open for me as I pull Cartman inside.

"Get him upstairs into the guest room." She says as she uses her chairlift. I throw him onto our guest bed, rip off his shirt before covering the bleeding wound with some cloth. I rush downstairs to grab Grandma's wheelchair, pulling it back up before running around the house to find the medical supplies.

"Where is he shot?" She asks, and I show her the wound.

"He's been unconscious for about 10 minutes now." I say as I hand her the scalpel.

"Put him under anaesthetic so I can take the bullet fragments out." Grandma orders. I quickly fend him the tablets. She is about to start the surgery but I stop her for a second.

"Wait!" I say. She turns around.

"What is it, dear?" She asks.

"Could he die, from this?" I ask, extremely worried. There's a long pause, which usually doesn't indicate anything good.

"Possibly." She finally says, lowering my spirits.

"Do you know this person?" She asks.

"Yeah, I do." I reply.

"Well, I think it is best if you don't watch this. Now go! Let me handle this." She orders, so I leave, but not before I take his rucksack. I go to my room, wondering what those gloves are, and why they have claws. I open the rucksack, the gloves at the top of the pile. I take them out, but in doing so, it reveals a revolver.

"Oh, no, nonono, this can't be happening.." I say holding the revolver. Suddenly, time begins to turn back, with me dragging Cartman into the guest room, me driving away from the alleyway, then when Cartman fell unconscious, then when he stabbed the dude, and got shot, and finally, when I met him in the clothes shop.

Suddenly, I jerk awake, realising that I was just reliving the last 12 or so hours in a dream. I check the time on my phone: 12:11. Fuck sake, it's only just past midnight? Damnit, I'm kind of fucking hungry too. Oh well, midnight snack.

I walk downstairs, rubbing my eyes a bit before turning right into the kitchen, and I- WHAT THE FUCK?!

Suddenly, I'm put into a headlock, with a knife around my neck. I struggle for a few seconds, but then I'm ultimately pushed away. I turn around to see- FUCKING, CARTMAN?!

"What the fuck was that for?!" I whisper scream as he switches on the light.

"Fuck! I'm so sorry, okay? I didn't think that was you, I thought they found us and, fuck sake, I thought you were one of them." He frantically says, before realising he still has the knife in his hand and sets it down on the table.

"So your first response is to hold a knife to my throat?!" I say, extremely pissed off.

"Hey, at least I didn't immediately stab you with claws.." He says.

"Ugh! What the fuck are you even doing up anyway?" I ask. He raises an eyebrow.

"There's two people in this kitchen, or did you forget that you were also awake at this time?" He says sarcastically.

"I'm getting something to eat, can't sleep. And I'm not the one with a bullet wound, remember?" I say as I open the fridge.

"I ask again, what are you doing up?" I ask.

"Same as you, hungry, since I haven't had anything to eat since I got, well, SHOT." He says before taking out a slice of pie from a cupboard. Wow, he still has the same eating habits, even though he has physically changed, quite, a lot… gosh, that's kind of distracting. Then a thought comes to mind.

"Wait, you said you thought "they" found us. Who's "they"?" I ask.

"Either one of the two mobs that both want to kill me…" He says. Now, he has done sone crazy fucking shit in the past, since he was in like, 4th Grade, but this? This is just fucking insane!

"You're saying, you have two versions of the fucking Denver Crime Mob, wanting to kill you?" I ask, bewildered.

"Yep." He calmly says before taking a bite out of the pie.

"How?!" I ask.

"Well, remember how I say I killed the leader of one group, well, that caused a gang war between my former mob and the mob which had a leader with half of his head blown off. But both want to kill me because of it, so, yeah, I'm kind of screwed." He explains.

"You don't seem scared about that." I say, skeptic.

"Have you met The Mole? Sure, he's crazy but he knows how to get shit done. Believe me, I'll be fine." He replies, stuffing the rest of the pie down his throat.

"You weren't fine when you got shot today. Hell, you nearly died." I protest.

"Well, it was either get shot, and kill the guy, or get shot, not kill the guy, and let you be dragged into a van to become some sex slave for some random asshole!" He says, a bit more aggressively. Now that stuns me. I look at him for a couple of seconds.

"What do you mean, a sex slave." I ask.

"That guy I stabbed, he works with a bunch of human traffickers, and that's where I think my mother is. Thing is, getting to her could be, complicated." He says.

"So, you left South Park to chase after your mother? Why?" I ask.

"I thought I already answered this question." He says.

"I mean, if you knew your mother was kidnapped by dangerous people, why did you think it was a good idea to chase after her?" I ask.

"Nobody else gave a shit. Not even the fucking cops. Hell, you said they gave up looking for me after two weeks, which, funny enough, is the same amount of time that they spent looking for my mother. Besides, I wasn't going to sit there, while the only person I ever cared about was probably being tortured or something." He replies. Why is "the only person I ever cared about" sticking out in that paragraph worth of words that he just spat out at me…

"Alright." I say as I walk back towards the stairs.

"So what are the looks about." I hear him say.

"Sorry, what?" I turn around and respond, confused.

"You asked me a question so it's only fair if I asked you one. Those looks you were giving me today. Looks of, wonder, confusion, surprise, whatever you want to call it. What were those looks you were giving me." At this point I realise what he means.

"It's just, I, um, I-" I struggle to find the words.

"Spit it out." He says.

"It's just, you're, different, from when we all last saw you. You've, changed." I say, a bit embarrassed.

"Define, changed." He replies.

"Well, you're not much of an asshole, like you've used to be, oh, and I noticed you started to, um, work out, I think that's what shocked me the most." I say.

"Oh, ha, ha." He says.

"Does that answer your question?" I ask.

"Just about." He replies.

"Okay then." I say, before heading up the stairs.

"Okay then." He says.

* * *

 _The Next Day_

I wake up, and suddenly a lovely smell enters my room. I stretch before getting out of my bed, and I slowly walk downstairs, rubbing my eyes. I then follow the smell into the kitchen, where I see.. Cartman flipping pancakes?

"What is this?" I ask, and he turns around with the frying pan in his hand.

"Let's just say I'm making it up to you. Oh, and, also to make it up to you for nearly slitting your throats last night." He says before turning back.

"Isn't this wonderful, Heidi? He's making us breakfast for the both of us!" Grandma says as she strolls in with her wheelchair.

"Go on then, sit down!" Cartman says, so we both take our places at the table, and he hands us both an omelette with bacon and eggs on the side, with orange juice as the drink. I take a bite out of the omelette, and to my surprise, it's fantastic!

"How, the hell do you know how to cook this well?" I say, as I stuff my face.

"I used to cook for my mom when she was sick. Turns out I'm quite good at it, but I still haven't figured out how to cook chicken like KFC does." Cartman replies. We all begin to laugh, and, I have to admit, this is quite fun.

Cartman's PoV

"Eric, that breakfast was beautiful." Cyndie says before wheeling out of here, leaving me alone with Heidi.

"So, what did you think." I ask Heidi.

"You're cooking is great, and I think you should try that KFC recipe, it might turn out well." She giggles.

"Well, I have to get changed, school's in an hour." She says.

"You're not going to tell anyone, about any of this?" I say.

"I know how to keep my promises, Eric. I'll see you later. Oh, and by the way, I talked to Grandma about how long you'll be until you're back in full shape and it'll only be a week, so I guess that's good news." She replies.

"I guess it is. Seeya." I say. Suddenly, my phone begins to vibrate. I check the screen, and it's The Mole.

"What's up?" I ask.

"Hey, I zhink I have noticed somezhing. I've been stripping some of ze parts of zhose trucks zhey left behind when zhey last attacked, as you know, but I didn't come across much until now. Some of zhese vans are appearing on ze CCTV footage at traffic lights, which I know how to hack into. Anyway, their routes are all different, except zhey all seem to turn off at one place, a road leading onto Littleton. Now, I've done some research, and it seems zhat zhere is a factory zhat closed down recently due to the company going bankrupt. You might be able to hit it, but are you ready? You can go in as earliest as two days, but ze bullet wound, will it be fine?" Mole asks.

A week, and I'll be a full strength…..

"Yes, it'll be fine." I lie.

* * *

 **A/N: Were you getting used to the happiness? Too bad, more death and gore is coming up! Anyway, if you liked this chapter, or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as that would be much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	15. Chapter 14: Bloodbath in Littleton

**So, there was this fun day at my school…. the only fun I had was shooting a water pistol at everyone (yes this start up line is quite shitty, but fuck it).**

 **001! Thanks for reviewing! I originally didn't intend them to be like the farm scenes in Logan, but I can tell where you are coming from after I read over my last chapter. And gee, maybe you are a secret agent. So, you liked Wonder Woman, nice, I still need to see it. And yes, Mask of the Phantasm is getting remastered. Can't wait! As for Guest, I get it, you hate ric, but can you not bring him up constantly? I kind of want to move past all of that bullshit. Filling, you're right, that Needs Jesus asshole just floods the SP Archive with a bunch of his off-topic idiotic bullcrap. It's fucking dumb. I remember the old Wolverine too, where people thought his claws were just added with the Adamantium bonding, guess not.**

 **Anyway, I have more killing to write! Let's get on with it!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _Two Days Later / January 28th / 23:58_

Cartman's PoV

I wake up as my phone vibrates under my pillow. Thank fuck for silent alarms. The phone's glow makes my eyes squint, but I check the time nonetheless. 2 minutes to midnight, hopefully they will all be asleep.

I quickly get dressed before slowly creeping downstairs, and it turns out I'm correct. I'm not going to run into Heidi during a midnight snack tonight, it seems. Bullet wound still hurts though, but not by that much so I might be fine. I search around the bottom floor of the house for a bit, before discovering a key rack near the front door. I examine it, and find a key with the word "Car" underneath it. I take the key before quietly opening and closing the front door.

I look around, and all I see is a lot of fields, with the city in the near distance of course. This place is a nice little country area, but with close access to the city. Nice and secluded. Just what I needed. I look around a bit more before finding the car. It looks a bit old, but I'll take what I can get at this stage. I hop in and start the car, before driving onto the dirt road outside the house before joining the main road into the city.

I keep driving for about 10-15 minutes before turning into the U-Stor-It that's actually our hideout. As soon as I step out of the vehicle, I get a text message, from the Mole.

 _You're late. Meet me in my office._

Nobody seems to be around, so I guess that's good. Don't need anybody finding out about this bullshit. I pace towards Christophe's "office", and I walk right in. I see he's at a computer at a desk in the corner.

"We're doing zis at quarter past midnight? Seriously?" He says, yawning.

"Well, I suppose to means there won't be many about, now would there?" I say, walking over to him.

"I suppose so. I've been looking over camera footage zat I've hacked into. Take a look at zis." He fast-forwards the footage for a few seconds before coming to a stop. He points at a portion of the screen, where a white van is.

"Look familiar?" He asks.

"Looks just like the one that ambushed me and Heidi in that alleyway." I say.

"Well, zhere's more." He says, opening another tab and fast-forwarding more footage. He then stops it again, and surely enough, there's an identical white van coming from another direction on the junction. He then does the same thing, except coming from another direction, and then another. All identical vans.

"License plates are all different in case you were wondering, and zis was from earlier tonight. Now, if I play all of zhis footage together, can you notice somezhing?" He says. I pay attention to the footage, before catching that they all turn off at the same turn. Every one of them takes the same road going out of shot at the left.

"They all go down the same street." I say.

"Exactly. Zhey all turn off towards a region called Littleton. So, I pulled up some satellite images, and it looks like zhere is an abandoned factory down there. Zat is my closest bet to where zhese fuckers are. Zhink you can 'andle it?" He asks.

"Well, if it's this late at night the place might be more quiet, so I'll give it a shot." I reply.

"In zhat case, I don't zhink it would be best for you to go with only your claws. We know zhese guys are armed, and dangerous, so I might as well get you zuited up." Mole says.

"Wait, what do you mean by, 'Suited Up'?" I ask.

"I mean you can't go in zhere with jeans and a shirt on. If you get caught, you need armour. Follow me." He gets up from his chair and exits the storage unit. He begins to lead me down a familiar path, and opens up the storage unit, revealing that set of armour he once showed me.

"Zhis is bulletproof, it will take everyzhing except maybe a close range shot from somezhing, like a… 'igh powered sniper rifle." He explains. He then goes to a nearby unit, opens it, revealing a bunch of boxes, and begins to dig through them. He then pulls out what looks like a sort of cowl. It's a dark brown helmet with a strap at the bottom.

"Take zhis. Also bulletproof. After I saw zhat blow you took from zhat baseball bat 2 weeks ago, I figured you might need zhis. Oh, and it is to prevent your 'ead getting blown off." He hands it to me. I place it on my head, and it covers the entire back of my head. It nearly covers the entire front too, except a large space for my mouth and two small gaps for my eyes.

"Hang on, how am I supposed to hear in this?" I say, noticing the helmet covers my ears.

"Small audio transmitters built inside. Should be ze same as normal hearing, but, could be slightly distorted, you know, like a radio?" He says, and I hear him exactly as described. Normal, with slight distortion.

"Oh, and take zhis too!" He throws something at me, which I catch. It seems to be, a belt.

"Why would I need this?" I ask.

"Comes with ze armour, free of charge." He jokes.

"Zhere isn't any space or pockets to carry shit, like for example, any evidence you find that could 'elp locate your mother." He explains.

"What, like a USB stick or a list of captured prostitutes or something like that?" I say.

"Yes." He responds.

"Now, when you are done, leave all of ze equipment back 'ere. Don't bother coming back to me, I'll be asleep by zhen. Tell me tomorrow what you found, zhen we can discuss our next move. Zhere is a car behind zhis storage unit with keys in it. Take that. Goodnight Cartman." Mole walks off back to his office.

I close the door behind me as I change in the storage unit. God, this suit looks so fucking weird. Oh well. At least it isn't cheap spandex. Alright, this place is near, Littleton, interesting. Don't think anybody will suspect me wearing a mask while driving to this place in the middle of the night, because this city is fucked.

After I get changed, I hop into the car and quickly speed off towards the place. After a while I come across the same crossroads all the other vans took on that security footage. I take a left onto the street where I should find this place.

Soon, I spot a suspicious looking building that has it's lights on, even though everywhere else has their lights off. Upon closer inspection, it looks like the factory that Christophe was talking about. I then hide the car in an inside alleyway, and I slowly make my way towards the building. Thanks to my suit's dark clothing, I might be able to sneak my way in here.

I hide behind some tall grass that's just behind some fencing around the building. There's a giant door open, like the garage doors at the warehouse for the mob, but this is a bit bigger. Nonetheless, it allows me to look inside. It looks like there's only about a few guys in there. Like, 6-7 men. Luckily, I don't see any holding weapons or anything, so that's great. Then, out of nowhere, a van zooms right past the fencing where I'm hiding, and enters through the large garage door. A man with a baseball bat exits the driver's seat, and opens up the back doors. He then starts to pull out, what the fuck….

He begins to pull out a number of, well, what looks to be, prostitutes out of the van, pushing them forward with his baseball bat. Then one of the men inside the building handcuffs all the girls, and pushes them all against the wall, along with the van driver.

This might be my chance to get closer, so I use my claws to cut the fencing I'm hiding behind before sneaking up behind the van. I poke my head around the corner to see what's going on, and the ladies are being forced to strip down. Jesus Christ. All of a sudden, one girl's eyes shift towards my direction, and she spots me. I quickly put a finger on my lips, and she then acts like nothing happened. Okay, good.

Suddenly I hear footsteps behind me, and a shadow behind the van is getting closer and closer. I can't risk anyone knowing that I'm here, so I quickly slip into the van to avoid detection. I then turn to my right to find someone staring at me with a half-eaten sandwich in his hand.

"So much for that idea." I mutter as he quickly reaches for his gun. I pop my claws and struggle with him for a bit, and his pistol comes dangerously close to my head, but I end up stabbing him in the throat. However, he didn't die immediately, not before firing his pistol as it's right next to my ear, fucking up the audio receivers inside the mask, and shattering one of the windows in the van.

I clumsily stumble out of the van, falling to the ground as my ears ring. I barely make out somebody say "Holy fuck! Luke's dead, man, he's fucking dead!", before I look up to see a man raise a baseball bat, before he sends it crashing down on my spine.

"Fuck him up!" He yells as they all start to kick and punch me on the floor. I manage to get up and overpower all of them for a second, but due to the effects of that gunshot, I'm swinging randomly at people, missing most attempts to slash them. Then the man with the bat hits me in the stomach, where my bullet wound is.

"GAH!" I cry out, and he upper cuts me, sending me to the floor. Everything's dizzy, as everyone starts pummelling me again. I see the van driver pull a shotgun out of the van, before I'm kicked onto my stomach. I then feel something pressed against the back of my neck, along with hearing the sound of a shotgun cocking.

But at this point, my senses return to normal.

I clench my fists in anger, as rage builds up, until…

"YEAAAARRRRGHHHHHH!" I scream before swiftly getting up and slicing the gunman's arm off, making him drop his shotgun, but the gun fires anyway and only narrowly misses one of the girls lined up on the wall.

"MotherFUCKER!" I yell before blocking one dude's attempt to punch me, while jamming my claws up through his chin and mouth. Another dude swings at me with a crowbar, which I duck before stabbing his underarm and throwing him into two other dudes. I feel a baseball bat hit against my back again, but this time I turn around, and stab the prick in the eyeballs. I grab another guy and slam his head into the van as I slice his back, then I notice the guy with his arm chopped off wriggling around on the floor, so I take the pleasure of executing him with his own shotgun. Then somebody strikes me in the stomach again with another crowbar, but I take it, whack him in the jaw with it before stabbing him multiple times in the chest. I turn around to see someone rush me with a knife, but I block him, stab him in the stomach before taking his knife and jamming it on his forehead.

I look around at the pool of blood and the floor covered in bodies, before noticing there's still one more standing.

"No, no, please, please don't kill me!" He pleads as he bleeds from his underarm. I grab him by the shirt and press him against the van.

"The Overlord, what do you know!" I growl at him.

"Nothing, nobody does, I swear!" He cries, but I'm not having it.

"I don't have time for this." I say before shoving my claws up his testicles. He cries out in immense pain, but I keep him in place.

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW!" I scream at him.

"T-There's a rumour, t-that someone k-k-knows him." He stutters.

"Where." I demand.

"Ugh…" He groans in pain.

"WHERE!" I make him jump.

"S-somewhere, d-down, south, of, t-the, c-c-city." He says.

"You've outlived your usefulness." I say before slashing his face, killing him.

I retract my claws as I turn towards the girls that are lined up at the wall.

"You're safe, get out of here." I calmly say before strolling out myself.

Now I'm one step closer to finding her.

* * *

 **A/N: If anyone can tell me the Logan reference in this chapter, you get an imaginary cookie! Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I'm sorry for the delay, but I hope to get another one out on the weekend. Please leave a review if you have any feedback, as it would be much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	16. Chapter 15: A Name

**Well, at least you didn't wait two weeks for this one.**

 **Congratulations, 001, you found out what I was referencing from the last chapter! I loved that opening scene from Logan so I desperately wanted to implement some of it into the story, and I did! As for the Guest, I don't think I would need Tumblr, but thanks anyway!**

 **Anyway, let's get back to the story!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

 _Later That Night_

Cartman's PoV

I carefully place the car where it was before I left before slowly opening the front door and tip-toeing in. I leave the car keys back on the rack, before slowly walking into the kitchen, attempting to make as little as noise as possible, and to get something to eat because after that, I'm hungry.

So, I turn on the lights, and- oh… fuck…

Sitting there is Heidi Turner, with both her arms and legs crossed, and the look on her face tells me she's pissed.

"The sound of the car starting woke me up." She begins.

"Oops." I mutter in embarrassment.

"After I heard the car start, I saw it just casually drive out of our driveway. Since my grandmother wouldn't even dare get out of bed at this time of the night, and since the keys are inside the house, I had a guess who took the car." She stands up and walks towards me.

"Then, I went into your bedroom, and guess what, you weren't there! Then I looked around your room, and neither was your backpack containing those gloves that had claws built in them, to, you know, KILL PEOPLE." She adds, staring at the bag around my shoulder. Well, I'm fucked.

"You were just shot like, 3 days ago! You were told that it would take a week for you to fully recover but you disobeyed me and my grandmother and probably put yourself in danger!" She says, furious.

"I'm fine." I say. But she seems to ignore me.

"Where were you?" She asks.

"What?" I reply.

"Where were you? Why did you leave at around midnight? What the fuck were you doing?" She asks.

"I was in Denver." I respond.

"Okay, what were you DOING in Denver?" She asks.

"Like I told you, trying to find my mother." I reply.

"Okay, and what were you specifically doing to help find your mother?" She asks.

"I, um, I was…" I struggle to find the words for this that might not piss her off even more.

"Well, go on?" She asks.

"I was, sneaking into a small mob base to gather information on my mother." I say.

"Sneak in, huh. Usually, sneaking in wouldn't give you a limp right now even though you were completely fine earlier today." She comments.

"Well, sneaking around can do stuff to your legs…" I try to weasel my way out of this one, but she raises an eyebrow.

"Alright, alright, I got caught, got into a little fight, but I managed to get out of it!" I say, going to the fridge to grab a soda.

"A little fight? How many people were in this, little fight?" She asks.

"Umm, like, six or seven…" Her eyes widen after I say the number.

"And, h-how many did you, well, kill?" She asks.

"Six or seven…" I give a weak smile as she slaps me in the face.

"All of them?! You killed, all of them?! I need to sit down…" She says, taking a seat again.

"Hey, if you saw what I saw you would have been completely fine with it." I protest.

"You don't just kill them in cold blood, you, you have to send them to a court of law or something." She says.

"Oh, you don't understand anything, do you?" I sigh.

"Well, I don't know, it's not like I have another friend who casually murders people!" She says.

"Listen, Heidi, they had a bunch of girls lined up against the wall and they forced them to strip down to their underwear. That could have happened to my mother, okay? And if you have a problem with me killing those people? Wait until I found the son of a bitch who did this, because then I'm going to cut him up into tiny fucking pieces of his rotten flesh!" I say, and that shocks her so much that she starts backing away from me. Then I realise I might have gone too far.

"I-I don't even….. who the fuck are you?" She asks.

"I'm sorry, Heidi, it's just, the last month has been hell for me, and I thought I'd find her sooner.." I admit.

"I get it, but, Jesus, fucking, Christ, that's just sick." She says, disgusted.

"Tell me, Heidi, your mother, she's in a coma because of Butters, someone you used to know. What would you do to him if you had the chance?" I ask her.

"I-I don't, I don't know.." She says.

"This bastard, specifically targeted her, I don't know why, and I don't know where she is. You know where your mother is, you know that she's alive, barely, but you still have hope. Right now, I have no clue, I have no choice, but to do anything, and I mean ANYTHING, to find her." I say.

"Surely you have limits.." She says.

"Anything." I say, before turning towards the staircase. But I stop when I reach the door.

"One question, you could have just stayed in your bed, you didn't have to come down here and wait all this time just to confront me here, so why did you? Why do you care so much? If I'm just the asshole everyone says I am, why care for me?" I ask. We have a stare down for a few seconds.

"Because you're not an asshole, and even if you were, someone should care." She says. I smile for a second before heading up the stairs.

 _The Next Morning_

"So, 'ow did it go?" Mole asks from his desk as I enter the unit.

"Well, everyone is dead and the ladies are all free, so it's a partial success." I reply.

"Partial.." He says, disappointed.

"I got nothing on her location." I say, pissed off.

"Fucking 'ell. We'll find somewhere else, surely." He says.

"Thanks. Hey, that suit, there's well, a few problems with it, specifically the helmet." I sit down next to him, as he looks through, oh, Jesus, porn, really?

"What about ze 'elmet?" He asks.

"The audio receptors need some work, like, if I hear a gunshot quite close to me, I won't have my ears ringing for the next 5 minutes, especially as I engage a bunch of assholes with baseball bats and crowbars." I say.

"Ouch." He replies.

"Ouch indeed. Especially if you get hit right where that gunshot wound is, that fucking hurt." I say, recalling the painful blow to my stomach.

"Yeesh. Could 'ave been worse. At least you weren't shot AGAIN." He says.

"Came very close to it." I reply.

"Mmm, 'ow so?" He asks.

"Well, I was hiding behind a van when this asshole came close to spotting me, so I had to hop inside. Turns out, this other asshole was still inside. I killed him, but not before he fired a shot very close to my ears, disorientating me for a while. Then this whole fight happened, so I had to kill everybody, and yet nobody knew jackshit about this "Overlord" douchebag or where my mother could be." I say.

"Mmm, I might 'ave something to 'elp with ze audio, and maybe boost it's range so zat bullshit might never 'appen again." He says, closing his laptop.

"Oui. Could be 'ard to cram into zat helmet though." He admits.

"I'm thinking of something." I say.

"Like what?" He turns to me.

"Well, you know how Mysterion had some sort of gimmick that made these gangsters crap their pants?" I ask.

"Oui." He responds.

"Well, something like that, but more, let's say, threatening." I say. Suddenly my phone rings. I look at the screen, it's Heidi, so I answer it.

"What's up?" I ask.

"There's some nest of raccoons or whatever, and it's at the back of our house. We tried everything, but they aren't coming out. Think you can help?" She asks.

"I'll be right there." I respond, before hanging up.

"Who was zat?" Mole asks.

"Heidi, yoh know, the girl that saved my life?" I say as I get up from the chair.

"Ah, right. What's going on?" He asks.

"Raccoon infestation, got to help clear it. I'll be back in around 45 minutes, okay?" I say.

"Never going anywhere." He says.

"Alright, see you." I say before leaving.

 _At The House_

"Alright, where are these pests?" I say to Heidi as I meet her outside the front door.

"Out round the back, bastards nearly climbed into the window. They're hiding in a bush near our garden. I've tried to get them out of here but nothing's working." She says.

"Alright, let me try something. Do you have a cardboard box or something?" I ask.

"Yeah, I have some when I moved here." She replies.

"Alright, meet me with the biggest box you have at the garden." I say.

I make my way around back, wait a few minutes, and she comes back out with a large box.

"Right, wait near the bush, but stay a good distance away, then I'll come in close as bait." I say.

"Umm, okay?" She replies.

"Trap them when I say." I tell her.

"Okay." She hides near the bush, as I creep towards it. I stop when I'm a few metres away, and a small raccoon comes out.

"Come on, where's your friends?" I say, creeping a little closer. Then three larger raccoons come out as well, closely following it.

"HEIDI NOW!" I shout, and she leaps from behind and traps all but one; the smallest raccoon. It suddenly lunges at her face, which she covers with her arm but she gets scratched. Before it does any more damage, I grab it and throw it under the box, and then I sit on it, trapping them.

"You okay?" I ask her.

"Yeah, yeah, it just, stings a bit." She says, showing me the claw marks.

"Jesus, that must hurt." I say.

"Probably doesn't hurt as much as yours." She laughs it off.

"Yeah, suppose so." I say, before getting an idea.

"I'll go get something to slide under that." She says before heading inside the house.

Raccoons, huh…

"Here, will this do?" She asks, bringing out a large sheet of cardboard.

"Should do well." I reply, and she hands me the sheet of cardboard.

"What, too scared to get scratched again?" I ask.

"I just, hate raccoons." She replies. Well then…

She then sits on the box as I get off, and I slide the cardboard underneath the box.

"I'll take it out to the countryside or something on my way back to work." I say.

"Alright, and, thanks!" Heidi says, before going back inside. I place the box inside the boot of the car, and I head back to Denver.

I stop just outside the city, near a field. I then release the raccoons back into the wild, before heading back into the car. But not before noticing the sharp claws on the raccoons. I then drive all the way back to the storage units.

I look around the place, and he's not in his office. Then I go around the back, where all the military like stuff is, and I find him working on the tank-like car.

"So, I have an idea, and you will probably think it's dumb as fuck." I say.

"Depends." He replies, rolling out from under the car.

"On what?" I reply.

"Ze idea. Shoot." He says before picking up a wrench, and going under the car again.

"Raccoons." I say.

"What?" He replies, rolling out again.

"Raccoons." I repeat.

"Zat _is_ quite dumb." He says, standing up.

"But it could work." He agrees.

"What's ze zpezifics?" He asks.

"Well, I was thinking, a raccoon's ears on the helmet to hide that thing you were talking about to boost the audio receptors?" I suggest.

"Mmm, zat could eliminate ze problem.. I'll think about it." He says, before going back to the car.

"Hey, um, is there any spray paint here?" I ask him.

"Should be zome where I keep ze armour, if zat is where you put it last night." He says before sliding back under the car.

"Alright, thanks." I say before walking off. I open up the storage unit where the armour is kept, and I look through some boxes to find the spray paint.

"Might as well give this alter-ego a name, right?" I say, before readying myself to spray an "R". Hmm, The Raccoon? That sounds a bit dumb..

I then spray on a large, capital "C" in the middle of the chest.

 **A/N: It took me about 16 chapters, but we finally have the suit and the name! If you liked this chapter or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as that would be very much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	17. Chapter 16: Upgrades

**So, even with school over I still can't find any time for stories. Damnit.**

 **Oh well, I'm a week late… again… but at least I'm updating now! Anyway, 001, the spray painting part was half inspired by Batman Begins, but not by that much. Also, your story "Grayson" is really good, and you should definitely try some South Park fanfiction! Oh, and enjoy your stay at that camp! As for the Glorious Guest, Mint-Berry Crunch is being considered, so stay tuned! And if I will do a story, expect some inspiration from Man of Steel (Man that was a great film).**

 **Anyway, on with the chapter!**

* * *

 _Three Weeks Later / February 15_

I enter Christophe's office, where I find him at his workshop, wiping blood off of his shovel.

"Now what the fuck were you doing that there's blood on that thing?" I say. He glares at me in disgust.

"Zat "thing" is more precious to me zan any of you cocksuckers." He says, before going back to scrubbing his shovel.

"Alright, alright, just asking." I sit down.

"Well, while you guys were delivering, I decided to visit my little friend in ze back storage unit." He says. I look at him confused.

"Sheet! I never told you what's een zhere? Well, remember last week 'ow a couple of hot head beetches tried to rob us? Well, I've been….. keeping one of zhem in ze back storage unit.." He admits.

"Oh for fuck sake." I laugh.

"Turns out he isn't useful, so I shoved zis up his ass before feeding him his own sheet and zhen I bludgeoned him with ze shovel." He says, before going back to cleaning.

"Oh, and speaking of ze deal, 'ow did it go?" He says.

"Same as any normal deal should go." I smirk.

"With ze deal going south and everyone on one side dying?" He says.

"What? No! Thing went smooth as shit, I just unloaded the boxes there now." I say.

"Good to know you are earning your keep." He says.

"Yeah, and about the real reason I'm still here, any luck on finding any more places?" I ask, hopeful.

"Sorry, but I've got nothing so far. Though I am close to working out some sort of connection, I can feel it." He says, but I roll my eyes.

"It's been three weeks since the last hit, damnit! I'm running out of time.." I say.

"Don't worry, as I said, I'm close to somezhing. Oh, and I've finally finished modifying ze suit." He says.

"Took you long enough." I reply.

"Come on, I'll show you." He gets up and leads me out of the door. Instead of taking me to the usual place, he takes me to a place near the back.

"What's with the detour?" I ask.

"Well, It was starting to get a little suspicious so why ze fuck not?" He says as we walk.

"So, what did you do?" I ask.

"Well, you said to give you a raccoon, so I'm going to give you a raccoon. Whiskers and all." He jokes.

"Oh yeah, that's definitely going to scare them into giving me information." I roll my eyes.

"Yeah, it took me a while to figure out what to do with ze ears, but I think I managed it in ze end." He says as we reach the storage unit.

"As long as it's practical." I say, and he opens up the unit revealing the suit in full view. First thing I notice is the huge red cape at the back of it…

"A cape… interesting." I say.

"Well, you were ze one who put ze big giant "C" in the middle of the chest so why ze fuck not? Besides, I used ze fabric I showed you a long time ago, remember? Ze one which is flame proof and bullet proof? Eh?" He pitches the idea.

"Huh, that actually is quite useful." I say.

"Zat's about as much as it gets when it comes to changes to ze suit. But ze 'elmet, well zat is a completely different story." He says before showing me the helmet. Oh dear lord..

"Holy shit those eyes." I say. He tosses me the helmet so I can examine it. Big different is that the helmet is a dark brown-ish colour, and the eye pieces are actually sticking out on the side a bit, like a mask was welded onto the front of it, except what Mole did was just extend that part of the helmet so it gives a more animalistic shape. Speaking of animalistic, the fucking ears! They are quite large, and if you look at it from the side it's like a large right angled triangle shape, but from the front they just look like slanted triangles. They retain the same brown-ish colour as the rest of the helmet, and are nearly in the middle of the top of the helmet, just slightly pushed up near the back, so they're like ¾ of the way from the front of the helmet.

"Now, ze ears are quite big because of ze wiring in zhem. Zhey are connected to your ear pieces, and what zhey do is amplify your sound so you can hear your surroundings a bit better. You can adjust these as you wish with zhis tiny, unnoticeable dial at ze right side of ze helmet. It should be able to help with stealth, particularly silent killing." He explains.

"Okay, now, what about the eyes?" I ask.

"Well, put it on first." He orders. I put it on, and he then taps the left side of the helmet, causing the eye pieces to get covered for a sec before my vision is restored again.

"Oh, shit, okay, this is weird." I say.

"Okay, now head inside ze unit. Do not be alarmed when I close ze door." He says. Me, skeptic, slowly enters the unit. He then closes the door as he said. Everything's dark in here...

"Now, double tap ze left side of ze helmet." He shouts through the door, which I do. Then the eye pieces flicker and suddenly, everything illuminates, with sort of a green-ish colour.

"Okay, now double tap it again and come out!" He says, which I do. He then opens the door and I step out.

"So, you did night vision?" I say.

"Oui." He responds.

"Wow, thanks man, you have really outdone yourself here." I say.

"Well, I was planning to do thermal but ze tech is really complicated so, maybe in the near future." He says before taking the helmet back and closing the storage unit.

"Anyway, day's done. I'll call if somezhing has popped up." He says, before leaving.

Alright, I'm actually going to be dressed up as a giant raccoon. Awesome.

 _At The House_

"Hahaha, you're doing homework!" I laugh at Heidi's dismay as I enter the kitchen to see her doing… Math! Hahaha! Glad I don't have to do that shit again.

"Oh yeah, so fucking funny. Such a shame that with all the killing and crime fighting, there's no time for you to be at school like every other normal kid." She says, before tapping at her calculator.

"I'm not a crime fighter. That job belongs to morons like Mysterion." I say, taking a look at the fridge.

"Mysterion isn't a moron! And besides, he probably still went to school." She says.

"And you know that, how?" I ask.

"What, that Mysterion goes to school?" She asks.

"Yeah." I reply

"Well if he can solve cases faster than the police, I'm pretty sure he went to school."

"Hey, Christophe doesn't go to school." I reply.

"That French creep is everything but normal." She smirks. The smirk fades as she slams her head on her book.

"Ughhhh, I hate Math!" She groans.

"Oh come on, dear, it can't be that hard!" Cyndie wheels in on her wheelchair, taking a glance at Heidi's notebook.

"Huh, what the fuck does this mean?" She says with a puzzled false before shrugging and wheeling off.

"Alright, let me take a look." I say, before taking a seat beside Heidi. I examine the worksheet….. okay this is fucking confusing.

"Why are there so many x's?" I ask.

"Yeah, this is what you're missing at school." She says, as my suddenly phone vibrates.

I check the screen, and it's a text from Mole.

 _Found a place on the Eastern outskirts of the city. Swing by to get the suit, can't explain much because it looks like they are getting ready to move, so we have to move faster. I've sent you directions to your phone, and here are some images so you know what to look for._

Below his message are pictures of what looks to be like, some large vehicle workshop? Interesting.

"Who's that from?" Heidi asks.

"None of your fucking business." I spit back.

"It's that French dude, isn't it? You're going out tonight like you did three weeks ago, aren't you?" She asks, worried.

"Yep. Just got a new lead. Giving you a heads up so you don't have to wait at the table for me." I smirk.

"What if you get hurt again?" She says.

"I won't get hurt, God." I ignore her.

"Granny, you've served in wars. Tell him the type of injuries you've seen." She says to Cyndie.

"Hmm… you're doing this to find your mother, aren't you?" She says.

"Yeah." I say, skeptic.

"Well, there was once this soldier I was treating in Vietnam, he got shot in the abdomen and I told him to rest for at least 3 days. Thing is, his buddy was taken as a Prisoner of War along with some other men. The squad we're going to roll out tomorrow to get them back. Now, even with his injuries, the soldier insisted to fight, because his buddy was one of those kidnapped. It was a great risk that he took." She tells the story.

"So, what happened to him?" I ask.

"He ended up leading the charge against his captors and pulled his buddy out of there himself. The thing I'm trying to teach you is, is that even if the risks are great, there is always something to fight for." She smiles.

"Granny!" Heidi complains.

"It's his choice to find his mother, whichever way he does it." She replies to her. She then turns to me again.

"Go get 'em, kid." She says.

"Thank you, Ms Turner. Hey Heidi, enjoy your math homework." I give her a snarky wink as she flips me off, rolling her eyes, but smiling. Cyndie giggles as I leave the house to make my way back to base.

 _At The Base_

I put the suit on, and man, this feels way better than I expected. I skip the helmet on and pop the eye lenses out. I then get into my car and I head towards the car shop.

I pull up near, and like the last place, the joint's well lit up. I see a car enter the garage part of the building, and it looks like there's only one guy there. Hmm, I have an idea.

I take off my helmet and I enter the car. I then drive into the garage when I make sure that he's the only person there. He comes up to the car and opens the driver's door.

"Man, what kind of fucking piece of junk is this bull- GAH!" I cut him off by pulling him inside and slitting his throat. I then put the helmet back on and walk through the door into, well, I should have known. A car shop always needs a good place to store some parts. And would you look at that, the place is filled with boxes, and gunmen.

Seems to be the main weapons storage building. This would be a nice takedown if I pull it off. I notice a guy a couple metres from me, and he seems distracted, so I sneak up behind next to him and pull him behind some crates near the back wall.

- _SNIKT_ -

I pop my right set of claws while covering his mouth with my left. I hold the claws up to his throat.

"What do you know about the Overlord?" I ask.

"Nothing! I swear to God!" He says, and I raise my hand.

"Seriously! I don't know anything!" He says. Just as it looks like he's about to scream, I slice his neck open, spilling his blood everywhere.

At that moment, I can hear commotion from outside. Suddenly, a hole is blown into the wall and a lot of gunfire ensures.

"THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE MOB IN TOWN!" I hear someone scream. Then I remember, I caused a gang war. I look at the chaos as the gunfire reaches full force, and fire comes from someone's flamethrower.

"Oh, shit." I say.

* * *

 **A/N: So, this is the type of criminal shit that I didn't really explore well in the last two Mysterion fics. You know, mob wars and stuff. So it'll be exciting to do this sort of thing now. Anyway, if you liked this chapter or have any feedback whatsoever, leave a review as that would be much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	18. Chapter 17: A Breakthrough

**Yikes, haven't updated in 2 weeks, this is bad.**

 **And a lot of weird reviews that I've just deleted because they are spam. Playa, to be honest this shit's getting annoying, and I really feel sorry for other writers getting spammed with a lot of bullshit. Also, welcome back 001! How was the camp? Also, I know that those movies influenced Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, especially that first heist scene, because I heard that was inspired by Heat.**

 **Anyway, on with this long overdue chapter!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

What looks to be like 15-20 people burst in through the hole in the wall, and they begin to shoot up everyone in the room. Some guys get into cover quickly, but others are too late to reach for their guns before they get riddled with bullets.

"Torch the place!" One of their gunmen say. The flamethrower guy starts torching some of the crates with weapons in them. He looks quite armoured, but maybe that flamethrower could be used against him. Suddenly, my ears start to crackle and the distorted sound begins to turn into a voice.

"Cartman! Zhere are some of zhose mob cunts making zhere way to ze workshop!" He says.

"Really? I never noticed." I sigh as I let him hear the gunfire.

"Oh, sheet." He says.

"Hang on, you added a radio into this?" I ask.

"Oui. Figured I could help you in some zituations." He says.

"Well could you help me now? There's guys with flame throwers and shit here." I say.

"Wait, did you say, flame throwers?" He asks.

"Yeah.." I say, skeptic.

"I might have sold zhese guys some weapons this morning.." He admits.

"Seriously?" I say.

"What? Zhey we're going after ze bastards who attacked us, remember?" He defends.

"Well, the dude you sold a flamethrower to is torching some crates here, crates loaded with a shit ton of weapons you may want.." I say.

"Oh fuck, if zat is ze case, kill zem all!" He says.

"Kill them all? I mean, flamethrower guy, sure, but everyone else?" I ask.

"I never liked zhose fuckers anyway." He says, coldly.

"Jesus, alright. I'll see you after this shitshow is done then." I say, and his voice no longer fills my eardrums.

The mob guys are on the far side of the room. The traffickers are on the opposite side, my side. If I want any answers, I have to leave them until last.

I leap out from my hiding spot, slicing down two guys in front of me, before making my way to the opposite side of the room.

"What the fuck." One of the mob says before I slit his throat. I then tackle another guy, stabbing him in the chest, before sliding across and slashing another's legs, tripping him, before slashing his neck. Most of the mob has now focused their gunfire on me, but thanks to my armour, it isn't doing much. Now that they are being assaulted on two fronts, the traffickers start picking some of the mob off, but not all. I continue moving towards the flamethrower guy, stabbing one dude in the chest as another one gets picked off in front of me. I then slash at another's stomach and another in the face, but now I have the flamethrower's attention. His armour blocks a lot of the bullets coming at him, but I catch a weakness at his eyeholes.

I don't have enough time to think though as he soon turns his flames towards me, but I use my flameproof cape to absorb most of the firepower. Two more mobsters use this as an advantage to start using crowbars and baseball bats against me, and some of the traffickers start whaling on me too. I'm knocked to the ground a lot with about 5 guys attacking me, and the flamethrower begins to advance towards me.

"ARRRGHH!" I yell as I stab one dude in the leg, then in the chest, as I struggle to get on one knee. Someone attempts to hit me over the head with a crowbar, but I catch it just in time, before getting up and whacking him over the face, knocking him down.

I dodge an incoming flamethrower blast by ducking and rolling, before slashing a two guy's legs, knocking them down. Before I can finish them off, I feel a gunshot very close to my head. I turn around to see someone with a gun pointed close to my face. So I grab his arm, flip him over, and slash his throat before he can fire another shot.

I'm hit with the flamethrower for a second, burning me slightly until I hold my cape up again. I have to get the flamethrower off of him. I try slashing at his leg but it just scrapes the metal plates covering it, so I glance up for a bit to see that his gloves could be a weak spot. I have to get him to reveal them more though. I quickly slide between his legs, as the guy I knocked down with a crowbar gets up. I quickly kill those two men whose legs I've slashed before grabbing him, and throwing him in front of the flamethrower. He screams as he gets torched to death, as I surprise the flamethrower guy by slashing hand, allowing him to drop the flamethrower. I pick it up, and fire it at his face, temporarily blinding him. As he struggles to see, I quickly leap on him, tackling him to the ground, before stabbing to claws in his eye holes, killing him.

I look up to see 4 guys who have survived the ordeal, set up a bunch of motorcycles to escape. I can't let them get away from me.

At this moment, police sirens become audible in the distance. This, plus me, makes the traffickers quickly get on their bikes. I rush towards them, as one of them escapes through the hole the mob made. Then another. Then another. The last guy tries to escape too but luckily, I'm fast enough to pull him off the motorcycle, stab him in the chest, before I quickly get on the bike and chase the other three down the street. The cops are quickly behind us, with about 3 cars chasing the whole lot of us into Downtown Denver.

We are forced to dodge cars left and right, and one trafficker isn't so lucky, as he slams directly into the back of a pickup truck, and gets knocked off his bike. I look behind me, and I notice that the cops aren't giving a shit about him, as they just drive past him and continue chasing…. me. Shit! I look up ahead and notice that the traffickers are turning into a road that has no other exits, except one small alleyway. Either way, it's a shortcut for me to follow. I've learned the roads thanks to my numerous jobs from the Mole, so I take a right turn, and surely enough, the cops follow me down that road. The cops start shooting at me, so I'm forced to dodge again. I lead them into a neighbourhood, where I can fit inside an alleyway, but their cars can't. I make it seem like I'm going into a dead end before taking a sharp left turn into the alleyway. I see one trafficker zoom past me, but when I exit the alleyway, the other is just in front of me. The cops have to go all the way back to try and catch us again, so that gives me a lot of time.

I use slipstream to pull up next to this guy's bike, which he notices. He grabs his pistol but before he can fire, I slash his arm and then his front tire, leading to his motorcycle flipping, and crashing him out. Only one left.

I follow him further into the downtown district, slowly gaining on him, until we're suddenly in the city centre. Most of the lights are off since it's extremely late at night, except street lamps, illuminating the area. I begin to catch up to this trafficker thanks to the slipstream, but he glances over his shoulder at me, and pulls out an Uzi or something. I'm not close enough to slash his hand or knock the gun out of it, so he shoots my front tyre, sending me crashing on the street.

"Son of a bitch!" I mutter as I struggle to get up. In the distance, I see his bike turn around, and now, he's heading right for me. Guess he thinks he can kill me then.

I get up, walking with a stagger as he approaches closer.

- _SNIKT_ -

I pop my claws, and begin to run right at him. He's still charging at me, top speed, but now I'm in a full sprint.

He's nearly there now, but I won't let him run me down tonight.

"YEAAARGHH!" I yell as he's directly in front of me, and at the last second, I lunge at him, jumping over the front part of the bike and tackling him off, with my claws embedded in his shoulders. We collapse on the ground, me on top of him. I take my right hand out of his shoulder and I hold them to his neck.

"What do you know about the fucking Overlord!" I growl.

"Nobody knows! For God sake, don't kill me!" He begs.

"SOMEBODY HAS TO KNOW WHERE HE IS." I growl again.

"A-Alright! There is someone! But you'll never get anything out of him!" He admits. YES, I FINALLY HAVE A LEAD!

I look behind me, and cop cars have just appeared in the distance. Oh, shit.

"Better talk fast, bub. Where do I find this fucking douchebag!?" I yell, twisting my left claws into his shoulder.

"Gah! Alright, alright! There's two locations where he might be, but I don't know where!" He cries.

"I need a fucking clue!" I scream.

"A-All I know is that he hosts fights to the death between the whores because there's too many of them! If you want to find him, y-you have to find where most of them go! I-It's the main prison for our girls! That's all I know!" He says. The cops behind us stop and hide behind their doors, with their guns pulled out.

"Release the hostage!" One shouts with a megaphone.

"Why does everyone else not know about this but you do?!" I yell.

"Because I'm not one of them! I-I'm a spy from the other mob! If we ever found out about this dude's existence, we are threatened to keep it a secret! T-That Enforcer guy was never second-in-command, he's just a puppet leader!" He says.

"RELEASE THAT MAN OR WE WILL SHOOT!" The cop shouts through the megaphone.

"Well, looks like time's up, bub." I say. His eyes widen.

"Please! Don't kill me!" He screams.

"Open fire!" The cop says, and the cops unload their bullets on me, but thanks to my armour, I'm virtually unscathed, minus a couple of bruises I might get.

"I'm not going to kill you, since you gave me an answer, but you're fate's decided by them now." I say before retracting my claws. The gunfire stops, and all I hear now are a bunch of clicks. The cops are out of bullets.

I stand up and stare them down. Their faces are full of shock, and fear. Guess the whole Mysterion thing has changed their opinions on guys with capes. I look at them all, and they slowly begin to reload their guns..

So I quickly pick up the spy's motorbike from the ground, and ride down the street away from the cops. I look in the mirror, and they have finally given up. The last I see of them is when they pick up the spy and arrest him, the rest is unknown for I speed off towards the hideout.

 _At The House_

I walk inside the house, staggering a bit, mainly because of pain and tiredness. Still haven't eaten in awhile though, so I turn on the light and- oh for fuck sake!

"Do you always stay up at night just to moan about me killing people?" I say to Heidi, who's currently raiding the fridge.

"Oh, no, this time I was just hungry." She says, before pulling out a couple yogurts. She tosses me one, and we sit down.

"So, how was your murder fest today?" She asks.

"Well, it was going well until I ended up getting caught in a gang war… that I caused." I say.

"You must've got hit pretty badly then, judging by the black eye." She points out.

"Wait, what?" I say.

"Yeah, you've got a huge black area covering your right eye." She says.

"Eh, I've had worse." I say before downing the whole yogurt.

"Wow, you still have your ways of eating." Heidi giggles, as I stand up and turn around to put this in the bin.

"Hey, you've got a big bruise on your neck too.." Heidi says, before standing up and walking up to me.

"Take off your shirt." She orders.

"Wait, what?" I ask, surprised.

"I said take off your shirt." She says, sternly.

"Okay.." I say, taking it off.

"Now turn around." She says, which I do.

"Oh for fuck, you have a shit ton of bruises on your back!" At this point I remember the crowbars…

"Well, when a bunch of guys are attacking you with baseball bats, crowbars.. and a flamethrower, shit's going to happen." I sarcastically say.

"How long have you been doing this and nothing has come out of it?" She sighs before handing me my shirt back. I put it on, laughing a bit.

"What, what is it, what's so funny?" She asks, slightly concerned.

"I've got a lead." I say, smiling.

"You, YOU DO!" Heidi says, smiling back. We both erupt into cheers and I pull her into a hug.

"Hahah! I might find her! I'm going to find her!" I say.

"You will." She replies.

* * *

 **A/N: Okay, I'm going to admit, we are close to the end of this story. Maybe like, another 4-5 chapters or so, it might be barely longer than the last two stories, it might be the same length in chapters, but we are approaching the end of the story. Thing is, I have a huge time gap to cover between February 15 - April 1, so I might have the next chapter dedicated to that time gap, it depends on what you guys think. Anyway, if you liked this chapter or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as that would be much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	19. Chapter 18: The New Sergeant

**So, I'm watching the entire MCU from start to finish. Next Up, THE WINTER SOLDIER!**

 **001, and original villain? I'm trying to think without making him/her a fucking cliche, and an un flawed character that's just good at everything (kinda like most "original" OCs in those shitty romance fanfics that has to have one of the main characters fall for him/her even though he/she seems to geeky or whatever to get the boy/girl. Fuck those stories.) As for your ending idea, I have something else in mind but I'll keep you ending for something else…**

 **Ah, yes, the troll squad has arrived. Or is it more like one little girl in his mother's basement trying to make me, GRRR, RAAAGE. Just, don't kid, don't.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _Three Weeks Later / March 8_

"Hey Jack! How many dealings have we done today?" One of the workers ask.

"Uhh, I think maybe, 3." I guess.

"Is that including the Mexicans this morning?" He asks.

"Oh, shit, 4 then, including the Mexicans." I tell him. I then hear a horn beeping from the front of the yard, and two small grocery trucks come to a stop near me, followed by a couple of cars behind them.

"Hey Kingston! Help me unload this truck, will ya?" A gunrunner asks after he gets out of his truck. I lift up the roller shutter door, revealing a load of crates. We make a chain to take em off one by one and get them onto the van, so they can be stored somewhere at the back of the yard.

Then, out of the driver's seat comes the Mole.

"Come on! Let's get zhese guns out of here fast! We barely evaded ze cops zis time." He shouts at us, and we move slightly faster to get the weapons off the truck.

"Kingston, get over here." Mole shouts to me, and I walk towards him with a notebook.

"Alright, how much shit did we get today." I ask.

"Well, we cleared ze last of it out, which would be about, 10 crates of shotguns, 15 crates of assault rifles, 5 crates of sniper rifles, 15 crates of pistols, and ze flamethrower, we finally found zat piece of sheet." He says.

"All included with ammo?" I ask.

"Oui, even zhough we have a sheet ton of ammunition anyway." He says.

"Now, follow me to my office, I have to explain zhings in, well, more detail." He says, and we slip off towards his office.

"I still can't believe it took you three weeks to clear our that weapons lot." I say, closing the door behind me.

"As you said, it was zhere main weapons vault, so, I expected a sheet ton of sheet. And zhere was." He says, going back to his computer. I notice his shoulder has a blood stain.

"Did you get into trouble with some people?" I ask.

"A couple of zhose trafficking assholes tried to claim back some of zhere weapons. Zhey got zhere asses whooped." He explains.

"Still got nothing?" I ask.

"I am sorry, Eric." He turns around.

"I interrogated nearly everyone left alive, but zhey all say zhat ze second in command is the Enforcer, who is dead." He says.

"The Enforcer showed his true colours when I was about to splatter his blood and brains on the floor and the walls. He was a coward. I don't think somebody would hire that as a second in command to a mob." I say.

"Well maybe zat "spy" was lying to you, to try and get of of zhat alive." He says.

"This, is the ONLY lead I have, okay? I don't want it going up in smoke." I say.

"He said somezhing about it being ze largest whore prison or somezhing?" He asks.

"Yeah, and this dude holds fights between these girls, so the place has to be big." I say.

"Besides, if that dude's lying, I know where he's being held, and I can pay him a visit any time I fucking want." I say.

"Wouldn't ze cops be all over you like ze last time?" He says.

"It's like fucking all of them now have something against a dude in a mask. Was that Mysterion thing that bad for them?" I ask.

"I don't think it's all of zhem, more like it's forced apon zhem to take out any vigilantes by ze new head of ze police." He says.

"How the fuck do you know that?" I ask.

"You don't watch a lot of news, do you?" He asks.

"I just play Xbox the entire time." I say as he shows me his computer screen. It shows a stern looking woman with raven-coloured hair tied into a bun, with glasses and a pissed off look on her face. Looks about, Late 20s, Early 30s.

"Who the fuck is this?" I ask.

"Her name is.. hold on.. Sergeant Emily Fitzgerald, was appointed ze head of the Denver Police Department after Sergeant Yates' resignation, after ze whole Mile High incident last summer. Hey, weren't you involved in zat?" He asks.

"Yeah, I was the dude who that cunt Butters kidnapped so he could execute me in front of everyone. God, if I saw that motherfucker right now I would skin him alive." I say, bitter.

"Well, zis beetch just hates all of you costumed freaks, and I believe she once tried to get Mr Yates arrested over allegedly helping Mysterion zat day, interesting." He says.

"Hey, there's a video from three weeks ago.." Mole says, before clicking the video.

"Last night, there was an incident involving two mobs, leaving many dead, which further increases our suspicions on a supposed gang war happening in the city. But more importantly, last night three of my squad cars found a man chasing one of these criminals down the streets of Denver, wearing a raccoon shaped helmet, and after looking at the bodies we found, there were claw marks found on most of the victims, along with gunshot wounds. This man has been speculated by the local media as another "Mysterion", which after last year's tragic events, involving the vigilante and his terrorist friend, Leopold Stotch, who, by the way, is currently locked up in a maximum security prison on the East Coast. Anyway, because of these events, we will now be actively hunting this man, and if he is watching this right now, I will send every cop car, every helicopter, every man after you if we find you. Any questions?" The video stops there.

"Well, zis seems to be quite a problem for you." Mole says.

"What? Some crazy police lady? I'm not worried about her." I say, firmly

"She has a lot of resources zhough, just saying." He says.

"Whatever." I say, walking out.

 _At The House_

"Hey guys! I'm back from work, got a few things at the shop which I can turn into dinner tonight!" I say as I enter the house.

"Hello Eric, how was your day?" Cyndie asks as I enter the kitchen.

"It was great, found out some crazy police lady is after me, but other than that, great." I say, storing the food I bought in the fridge.

"Where's Heidi?" I ask.

"Um, she's, upstairs, in her room, but I don't think you should go up there though." She says.

"Why not?" I say.

"She just visited her mother in the hospital. It's the first time she's done it in months. And she's not holding up so well, with her being in a coma and what not." She says.

"Oh shit, I'm going to talk to her." I say, about to head upstairs.

"Eric, the last time she saw her she was in her room for 3 days. Just a warning." She says, but I ignore her. I go up to Heidi's door, and knock.

"GO AWAY!" I hear her scream from her room, before I hear her crying again.

"Heidi, Heidi it's me, can you please stop crying?" I ask.

"FUCK OFF ERIC." She screams again

"Heidi, Heidi, please, Heidi, open the door, let me calm you down or something." I say.

She then unlocks her door, and I she looks like a mess. Tears streaming down her face, hair all over the place.

"If you want to help, leave me alone." She says before she slams the door in my face.

"Jesus, fucking, Christ." I say before I head downstairs again.

"Well? How did it go?" Cyndie asks sarcastically.

"Looks like she isn't joining us for dinner." I say, before I start cooking.

* * *

 _The Next Morning_

I grab my things before leaving my room, until I hear guitar strings coming from Heidi's room.

"What the.." I say before walking over to her door. I open it up a tiny bit, and I see her plucking away at a six string, facing away from the door.

"You're pretty good at that." I say, making her jump.

"Jesus! I didn't know you were there." She says.

"Well, at least you're not slamming a door in my face." I walk over to her.

"Sorry about that, I was just.. well.." She struggles to find the words.

"I know, must be hard seeing her like that." I say.

"With everything that's going on, I, um, I forgot what she looked like. The scars, the burns, everything." She says, nearly starting to cry again.

"Don't worry, okay? She'll make it." I say, assuringly.

"Heh, you know, the old you would probably laugh about it." She smiles.

"The "Old" me? I'm still an asshole y'know." I say.

"No you're not." She says.

"Well, that's because I'm not in my costume, THEN, I'm an asshole." I say.

"Yeah, I heard it all over the news. People are calling you, "The Coon." Is that what the "C" stands for?" She asks.

"Yeah, actually, it is. I mean, the "Raccoon" sounds pretty dumb right?" I say.

"And "The Coon" doesn't?" We laugh.

"Hey, you never know, it might be giving people nightmares about a guy with cat ears." We laugh again.

"You know, I had no idea what you were thinking when you started doing this costume thing." She says.

"Neither do I. Hey, you know what, you haven't been out in a while. Come on." I say.

"Wait, what? Where are we going?" She asks.

"Coffee." I say.

"But aren't you like, the most wanted man in Denver right now?" She follows me down the stairs.

"The Coon is, not me, I'm the guy who everyone thinks is dead." I say, grabbing the car keys.

"Hey I'm driving." She takes the keys off my hands.

"What? _You're_ driving? Have you seen me drive?" I ask.

"I'm not going to be stuck in a car with a criminal handling the wheel." We get in the car.

"I'm not that bad at driving." I say.

"The last time you dressed up, you know how I said you got a bunch of bruises?" She asks.

"Yeah? So what, I got hit a lot of times." I say.

"A quarter of them looks like bruises you would get if you crashed on a motorcycle and landed on the road." She smirks.

"Fuck you and your medical analysis." I roll my eyes.

 _At Starbucks_

"So, how close are you to finding her?" She asks as she sips her coffee.

"Well, about 2 months ago, this guy said I could find someone who may know the guy who's keeping my mother, in the south of the city. So, three weeks ago, I went there, and I found out that there's this dude who's setting up, like, fights between girls they kidnap. I think it's a whole, lose you die sort of thing. Thing is, I don't know where he is." I say, eating my waffle.

"Well, if he's in the south of the city, it shouldn't be too hard to find him then, right?" She says.

"It's a bit complicated, because they are so good at hiding." I explain.

"So, like, even the cops can't find them?" She asks.

"I don't think the cops care, since they are more focused on trying to bring me down." I say, drinking more coffee.

"Well, everyone was pretty tense after the whole Professor Chaos thing. Must have been bad for you, since you were, you know, threatened with a sword and all there." She says.

"Heh, if the other guy met him now, the sword would be through his chest." I smirk.

Heidi's eyes wander the room, but they come to a stop. Suddenly, she has a worried look on her face.

"Eric.. these guys are staring at me.." She says. I then turn around and- Oh Fuck!

"Heidi, we need to get out of here." I tell her, as I down my coffee.

"Who are th-" She speaks.

"Just run!" I cut her off.

* * *

 **Who were these mystery people that scared Heidi and Eric? Why the fuck did I make such a huge time gap at the start of this story so I had to fill it in with chapters like this? Why are they going to Starbucks and expecting for them to get your name right? All of these questions probably won't be answered except for one, in the next episode of Dragon Ball- I mean the next chapter of this shitty story! Anyway, if you liked this chapter or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as that would be greatly appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	20. Chapter 19: The Tour

**Huh, two updates in less than a week? This is MADNESS!**

 **001, ah, sheet, I thought I was past the days of spelling errors. Sheeeeet. Actually, no that wasn't a Logan reference, and I had no idea about that connection until you told me about it, so, yeah. As for the MCU, this is my rankings so far:**

 **1: Captain America: The Winter Soldier**

 **2: Iron Man**

 **3: Guardians of the Galaxy**

 **4: Ant-Man**

 **5: Avengers: Age of Ultron (Unpopular opinion)**

 **6: The Avengers**

 **7: Iron Man 3 (oh yeah, that's a shocker.)**

 **8: Captain America: The First Avenger**

 **9: Thor: The Dark World**

 **10: Iron Man 2**

 **11: Thor**

 **12: The Incredible Hulk**

 **So yeah, these are my rankings so far. As for Netflix shows, I'd rather stick to the movies to be honest. Maybe Daredevil or Jessica Jones but not Iron Fist or Luke Cage. Der Berrarchen, that information is classified (probably not true either) but the Overlord should be revealed in about…. X number of chapters. :)**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of these characters.**

* * *

I burst out of the coffee shop with Heidi closely behind me. I pull out my phone and quickly text Christophe:

 _Starbucks, Park Avn, Need Outta Here._

"They're gaining on us!" Heidi says. I look behind me to see them catching up to us.

"Shit, alright, I have an idea. Head down the next alleyway." I tell her, and we head in. Unfortunately, there's a locked gate blocking us to the other side of the block, and it's too high for a boost.

"And now we're trapped. This was your idea of an idea?" Heidi asks.

"Just wait." I say as they come round the corner to face us.

"Well, would you look at that Geoff. It's our old pal Jack." Jeremy sneer.

"Wow, we haven't seen you in a long ass time." Geoff says.

"And it looks like you have a little bird with you now! Ain't that cute!" Jeremy says.

"Guys, just forget about this, walk away." I warn them.

"Would you look at that! He's playing tough guy now!" Jeremy laughs.

"Maybe it's the girl? I wonder what would happen if we started our own little.. business." Geoff says, before pulling a gun on us.

"C'mon little birdie, come with us!" Jeremy grabs her.

"L-Let, Go!" She struggles. I'm about to lunge forward but Geoff directs his gun towards me.

"Ah, ah, no, you stay." He laughs.

"It's too bad the Boss put a bounty on your head, you seemed like a nice guy." Jeremy says.

"Too bad I gotta put a bullet in your he- GAH!" He gets cut off when Heidi uses her leg kick Geoff in the face, before she elbows Jeremy in nose, breaking his hold on her.

"You, little bitch!" Jeremy screams and tries to lunge at her, but she dodges and punches him in the face. Geoff raises her gun at her but I grab his arm, and swing him around into the wall, knocking him down. Jeremy tries to swing at Heidi, but I grab him and push him up against the wall, punching his stomach and torso before knocking him down with a right hook.

I then hear rattling coming from the gate, where I see a man with a balaclava breaking open the lock with a fire axe.

"I think now's the time we get the fuck out of here." Heidi says to me, as the man breaks the lock and let's us through. He leads us to a red car near the alleyway, where me and Heidi hop in, before we drive off.

"I don't know why you texted me, it looked like you had zat under control." Christophe says as he takes off the Balaclava.

"I thought we were royally fucked, then she started kicking dudes in the face. Hey, how did you even learn how to fight?" I ask Heidi in the back.

"Um, I picked a few things off of watching Kenny fight people in the cafeteria." She says.

"Well then." I say.

"He's a surprisingly good fighter." She says.

"Well, with him being so poor, all he would be doing nowadays is fighting a bunch of 9th Graders or fucking Bebe in an Easter Bunny costume or some bullshit." I say.

"Zanks for zat image in my head, beetch." Mole says in disgust.

"Wait, is that, is that the Mole?" She asks.

"Ze one and only. And I believe you're Heidi Turner?" He asks.

"The one and only." She smirks.

"You two, don't flatter yourselves." I tell them off.

"Mole, are you driving us to the units?" I ask.

"Oui, why you ask?" He asks.

"Well, they never saw Heidi before, so it might be a little weird." He says.

"What do you mean it might be a little weird?" Heidi asks.

"Zhey have never saw you, and zhey would think I'm letting a bunch of keeds in." Mole explains.

"But, aren't you like, the same age as us?" Heidi asks.

"Well so was zat faggot Butters, and you know how zat turned out. I'm just ze less chaotic version." He says as we enter the yard.

"Heidi, keep your head down." I tell her as we drive through the yard.

"Hey, beetch, you want to know what zis braindead idiot wears when he, "goes out"?" He asks.

"I don't think that would be-" I try to speak up but I'm cut off.

"Oh hell yeah." Heidi smiles. I flip her off as we head to the back of the yard. We get out of the car when we are sure that there is nobody around, and he leads us to a storage unit. He opens it up revealing the suit.

"Wow, I was not expecting that." She says as she gazes at the suit.

"Is that good or bad?" I ask.

"Good." She says.

"Most of zis was modified by me, specifically ze helmet. Ze cape is both bulletproof and flameproof. Ze suit is quite good for stealth, as ze helmet can have lenses zat switch to night vision. Still working on ze thermal part." He says.

"Huh, I thought that shit was just for style points." Heidi says.

"Zhere are also enhanced audio receptors built, inside the earpieces of ze helmet." He tells her.

"Are you sure you aren't trying to be Batman or something?" Heidi asks me, to which I respond by rolling my eyes.

"Should I show her ze car?" Mole asked me.

"It's not even complete yet." I tell him.

"Ze interior features aren't complete, but ze outside is pretty much finished." He says.

"Fuck it. Next thing you know we'll be showing her where we go to the fucking toilet." I say.

"Actually, I kinda need to piss…" She says. Mole and I look at her with a look that just screams "Seriously?"

"Just, do it into one of zhose empty boxes or somezhing." Mole says.

"What?!" Heidi and I say.

"Ze toilet is in ze other side of ze yard!" Mole says.

"So fucking what? I'm a human being, not a fucking wild animal like you probably are." Heidi narrows her eyes.

"You little!" Mole points a finger at her, but ultimately sighs in defeat.

"Fine! But you are taking her there!" He says to me.

"Alright, alright, Jesus." I say.

"Meet us at ze car site." He says.

"Will do." I reply as I usher Heidi to the toilet.

"Stay close to me, and if anyone spots us, make some bullshit up." I tell her.

"Got it." She replies, and we take a route where, hopefully, nobody sees us.

"Hey, Jack! Who's the chick?" I hear from a distance.

"Oh, hey, Henry." I say.

"Hi. Who's the chick?" He comes closer.

"This is Heidi, she's my, uh.." I struggle to find the words.

"Cousin! I'm his cousin." Heidi blurts out.

"Yeah, cousin, right." I go along with it. He looks at us both, before looking around to make sure nobody's here.

"Listen man, I get it, you got a girlfriend but you're afraid of what the other guys think of her. It's fine, you're secret's safe with me." He says. Me and Heidi just stare at him in shock for a minute, before one of us finally speaks.

"Um, thank you." Heidi says, and we turn to walk away.

"Hey, wait!" He says, and we turn back around.

"Yeah?" I ask.

"What's she doing out here anyway?" He asks.

"She moved from New York a few months ago, she's used to this shit." I lie. God, that was terrible. He looks at me for a second, before giving me a nod.

"No wonder. I'll see you later!" He walks off, and we continue.

"We are never doing that again." I say.

"Agreed." Heidi replies.

I lead her to the toilets set up at the side, and she stops and groans.

"Are those fucking Porta Potties?" She asks, looking at the line of ten or so Porta Potties lined up on the wall.

"Oh, so you want to go back to the box? Alrighty then." I turn around.

"Wait, no! This is fine, thank you." She says before heading into one.

I stand by it and pull out my phone, bringing up the web browser.

"Emily Fitzgerald, let's find out how much of a bitch you are." I say, before looking her up. Oh great, all of the news is just filled up about The Coon, how lovely…

Let's see, born in 1988, making her… 30 years old. Made Head of Police after the whole Mile High incident, yeah, yeah, knew that already. Parents were killed in a car crash with masked bank robbers at the age of 9….. and placed into an orphanage where she was forced to do hard labour until she was 16. Well, that explains the discipline issues, and the hatred towards masked guys. Enlisted in the Denver Police Force at age 22, and was one of the main Anti-Mysterion police officers and protesters. Interesting.

And Heidi is STILL IN THE FUCKING TOILET.

"Jesus, are you crapping out the state of Texas or something in there?" I ask as I put my phone away.

"No, it's um, something bad." She says through the door.

"What?" I ask.

"I was in the middle of doing a number 2… and I just realised that I've started my per-"

"STOP, I'VE HEARD ENOUGH." I say, sticking my fingers into my ears.

"Yeah, good thing I always have a tampon on me." She says.

"What? Why?" I ask.

"Why? It's a girl thing. We have it like, every month." She says.

"You do?" I ask.

"The fuck? You didn't know that?" She asked.

"No, I did not know how many times blood comes out of a woman's vagina every month. Jesus, fucking Christ, where do you know that from?" I say.

"From school. We learned this in like, 5th or 6th Grade, hell, you were in our class!" She says.

"Well, I never really paid attention in school." I say, as I finally hear a flush and she opens the door.

"That explains a lot of things." She says, strolling out of the toilet.

"The fuck is that supposed to mean?" I say.

"Just show me this car that your French friend keeps jacking off to." She says, and I lead her round the back again, where Mole is standing at the garage door with his watch out.

"Were you two having a quickie in ze toilet or somezhing?" Mole smirks, and I immediately facepalm, hearing Heidi beginning to throw up.

"Mole, I swear to Christ." I mutter.

"Ha Ha Ha! I'm just fucking with you." He says as he opens the garage. Inside, is the now fully-black armoured vehicle, which looks a bit like the Batmobile from that Batman movie we watched in class last year. That was kickass.

"As you can see, ze vehicle is completely covered with armoured plates, with big bulletproof tires. Zhey are designed so it can be used as an all-terrain vehicle, but just as fast on ze road. Has a storage compartment on ze roof of ze car, just above ze booster at ze back and behind the main door, which opens up like a lid, unlike normal doors which open up at ze side, this one opens from ze top, either normally from pulling it up like this." Mole explains, before lifting up the door.

"Or like this." He says before closing the door, and then pulling out what looks like a car key to open it up, kind of like a remote control.

"It holds ze driver, a passenger, and I bet you can fit someone inside zat back compartment." He says.

"And you still haven't completed it yet." I tell him.

"Zhere are some zhings I have to re-wire and some sheet I have to work out, but it should be ready in ze next few weeks." He tells me.

"Think I can get behind the wheel of that?" I ask.

"You wish." Heidi and Mole both say simultaneously.

"Well, this has been a nice tour and all, but I think I should get going." Heidi says.

"Well, it's been a pleasure meeting you, Heidi." Mole says before grabbing Heidi's hand and…. kissing… it…. what the fuck.

"W-Well that wasn't c-creepy at all…" Heidi smiles weakly before Mole leaves.

"I, I don't, I'm just gonna, bring you, home, yeah?" I say.

"Yeah." I say as I usher her to a car.

We drive out of the yard and on the way back to that Starbucks, hopefully Geoff and Jeremy aren't there again.

"So, did this cheer you up?" I ask.

"Y'know what? Being chased by a bunch of guys trying to kill me, being shown your weird armoury, was surprisingly fun. So yes, yes it did, and thank you by the way." She says as we stop next to her car.

"No problem. I'll see you back at the house, okay?" I say.

"I ain't going anywhere!" She smiles, before hopping into her car and driving back home.

* * *

 **A/N: Okay, I have done the math, and I believe there are about 4 chapters left to write. Maybe 3 if I merge the last two together and create some super long shit, maybe not though. Either way, this story will be wrapping up in the coming weeks. Anyway, if you liked this chapter or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as that would be very much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	21. Chapter 20: Fools' Day

**Well, the power's out, but my iPad is charged. Might as well write a couple of chapters.**

 **001, we are indeed getting close to the end. A few more chapters or so, to be exact. I have watched all MCU films except Spider-Man now, so here's my list.**

 **1: Captain America: The Winter Soldier**

 **2: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2**

 **3: Guardians of the Galaxy**

 **4: Iron Man**

 **5: Captain America: Civil War**

 **6: Ant-Man**

 **7: Doctor Strange**

 **8: Avengers: Age of Ultron**

 **9: The Avengers**

 **10: Iron Man 3**

 **11: Captain America: The First Avenger**

 **12: Thor: The Dark World**

 **13: Iron Man 2**

 **14: Thor**

 **15: The Incredible Hulk**

 **I've also gotten into this anime called RWBY. I think it's quite good and I recommend you check it out if you like anime.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

Heidi's PoV

"No, NO, NO!" Cartman jolts awake as I quickly hide the water balloon behind my back.

"Nightmare?" I ask.

"Yeah. I'm so closer to finding her, I guess I'm starting to worry." He rubs his eyes.

"Must've been rough." I say.

"It was." He replies. He then looks at me curiously.

"Wait, why are you here?" He asks. I smile deviously before throwing the water balloon at his face, soaking him.

"April Fools!" I yell in delight.

"Grrr!" He begins to get out of bed, as I rush out of his room.

"C'mere you little bitch!" He yells angrily as I rush outside. I turn around to see him, with HIS FUCKING CLAWS?!

"Woah, Eric, I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to piss you off that much." I back away from him as he advances towards me.

"You really shouldn't have done that." He says as he backs me up against a wall.

"Eric…" I say, before he smiles deviously.

"Gee, I wonder where that rope came from?" He looks to his right. I see the rope, and my eyes follow it all the way up to the roof, where I see… A BUCKET. It's too late to get out of the way as he slashes the rope, backs up from me as a bucket of water is dumped on top of me.

"April Fools!" He laughs, taking off his gloves.

"Alright, you got me good." I say squeezing some water out of my hair.

"Well, it wasn't necessarily my idea.." He says, and, oh for fuck sake!

"Grandma, what the hell?!" I say as she comes out laughing.

"Thank you for the prank idea, ." He says, as I roll my eyes.

"It was a pleasure, Eric." She laughs.

"I hate you." I say to the both of them before I go inside to dry myself.

"No you don't!" Eric shouts behind me.

 _At Mole's Base_

Cartman's PoV

"New shipment in, boys! Get it off the damn truck!" One of the men says as he opens up the back. We create a daisy chain to unload the boxes off, until Mole comes directly to me.

"Hey, I zhink I finally found somezhing. Meet me after you're done with zis." Mole says. I nod as we continue to unload the crates.

"What was that about?" The person behind me says.

"Nothing, just some errand." I lie.

"What kind of fucking errand?" He asks, sceptic.

"What does it matter to you?" I reply.

"Oh, it's just you seem to disappear with him quite a lot nowadays. Don't know why he's suddenly going to the rookie all of a sudden." He says as we finish unloading the truck.

"Just asking, where were you when those assholes attacked us 2 months ago?" I say before walking off. I head into Mole's office, where he's typing away at his computer.

"After weeks-"

"Months." I cut him off.

"Right, months, of searching, I've finally found a link. And it's at…. 'ere." He shows me his screen.

"It's a warehouse." I say.

"It almost looks like the one where the other mob operates from, but bigger. How would the cops not pick up on this? It's near the centre of the city." I continue.

"Well let's see, we've seen drug trafficking, human trafficking, untraceable weapons dealing… what's ze other stereotype that would make a city nearly as bad as New York?"

"Corrupt cops." I answer.

"Exactly. My bet, ze reason zhey are kept quiet is because zhey are, "entertained" by our fellow criminal scum." He says.

"Looks like zat new Sergeant can't even keep tabs on 'er own men." Mole laughs.

"Well, I guess I can expect a massive response if it all goes to shit." I say.

"And a faster response time. You would 'ave, only a minute or so until ze cops come barging in." He says.

"Suppose it's a price I'll have to pay." I say.

"Don't tell me you will kill ze cops too?" He says.

"If it needs to be done, I might." I say.

"Go figure." He says.

 _Midnight / At the Warehouse_

I park the car in an alleyway, and put on my mask. The building looks big, for sure, but there's no way I'm getting in through the front door like last time.

I sneak up to the building, staying away from the light coming from the street lamps. I'm at the side of the building, where the parking lot is, but there is a door here. I try to open it, but it's locked. I try to jam my claw in the lock, but it's too small for me to try and lockpick it. If there's another door, it's on the other side, and since the back is closed off by a large wall, which isn't wide enough for me to squeeze through, and the front is suicide, I might have to try something new.

I look up to see if there are any open windows. Shit, none. There's a window directly above me though, but it's too far up on the second story for me to reach it. I gaze at the brick wall, and the look back up at the window. Hmm, I wonder…

- _SNIKT_ -

I jam my claws into the brick, and I lift myself up off the ground.

"Huh, okay then." I say, before pulling myself up a bit more. I continue climbing up the wall, nearly slipping once, but I regain my grip until I'm at the window. I peek inside. It's just a spare room with a few boxes in it.

I suddenly hear a car coming, and I look down to see light approaching the car park, fast.

"Fuck it." I say, before smashing the window and jumping inside. I look down to see, oh, those fuckers again. What did you call them? Glenn and Shane? Yeah, those pricks. They're in a van, which they open to pull a bunch of girls out of it, with their guns pointed at them.

"Jesus Christ." I mutter. My audio receptors then pick up footsteps coming closer, so I swiftly plant myself behind the door, as it opens. A man walks in, with a shotgun raised, slowly looking around the room. Before he can turn to me, I stab him in the back and slice his throat from behind, before leaving him in the room as I sneak out.

I'm on the second floor, so I need to get down to the first. I sneak around a bit, before I find a stairwell. I open it up, just as someone has reached the top of the stairs.

"What th- WOAH!" I kick him down the stairwell, before leaping down on top of him, and slicing his throat.

 _-BANG BANG-_

I hear gunshots from the bottom of the stairs, where someone's shooting at me. The armour absorbs the damage as I hop over the rail. He continues to shoot but I slice his hand off, and stab him in the chest, up against the wall.

"GAHH!" He screams until he's dead.

I exit the stairwell, moving through the corridor until I see someone familiar at the end of it.

"You lost or something?" He shouts down, and I recognise that it's Shane. That leather-clad asshole is smoking a blunt, which means he probably doesn't even think this is real. This should be fun. I start walking over to him, and he raises his gun.

"You really wanna come closer pal? This ain't fucking Halloween y'know." He says but I keep walking.

"Hey, hey! Stop walking! I'll shoot the fucking shit out of you if you keep walking!" He says, but I continue to come closer. He then mutters something before unloading 5 bullets into me, but I'm unaffected.

"What the fuck.." He says as I pop my claws. He raises his gun again and pulls the trigger, but it's out of bullets. I push his arm away and stab him in the stomach.

"AGH!" He screams as I yank my hand out of his stomach, before slashing his face, killing him.

Glenn's PoV

As we line up the girls, we hear 5 gunshots coming from Shane's post. What the fuck is that idiot doing now?

"AGH!" We hear a faint scream coming from the door, until it get's kicked open by- Oh Shit!

"What the fuck…" One of my men says before we begin to unload on his ass. He dives behind a car to avoid the bullets, but he soon comes out.

"YEAAARRRGHH!" He yells before he starts slashing at my men! It is true then!

I hide behind one of the vans as I hear screams, gunshots and other gory noises coming from behind. I can hear metal slicing through flesh, and I take a peek from the van, only to see blood everywhere and this, raccoon man slashing people's throats and cutting off limbs. He's wiped out nearly everyone as I see him lunge at the last two of my men. I take this opportunity to come out of hiding, but he sees me before I can shoot him. He starts running towards me as I begin to shoot, to no avail. He then claws my leg, making me collapse and drop my gun.

He then drags me onto a table and uses some rope that we use on the whores to bind my arms and legs to it.

"Now, I'm going to ask a simple fucking question, and you better fucking answer this motherfucking question the way I fucking want it to be answered, alright?" He yells at me.

"GAH! OKAY, JUST PLEASE, DON'T KILL ME, PLEASE!" I scream. He then grabs me by the throat and points his middle finger at it. Wait, what's that attached to it?! IS THAT A CLAW?!

"Where, the fuck, is Liane, Cartman." He says. Who the fuck is that?!

"I, I don-, I don't.." I start to say.

"WHAT'S THAT YOU ARE TRYING TO SAY, BOY?" He yells in my face.

"I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T FUCKING KNOW, OKAY?" I cry.

"Well that ain't fucking good enough." He says, before raising his hand.

And everything turns red.

The Coon's PoV

"Son of a bitch." I say as I hear the sirens approaching closer. I then frantically begin to search Glenn's body, to see if I can find anything useful… YES!

I pull out a piece of paper, with what seems to be some co-ordinates written on it. I put it in my belt as I hear the police outside.

"WE KNOW YOU ARE IN THERE! COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP OR WE WILL COME IN THERE AND FORCE YOU OUT!" I hear coming from a megaphone as a battering ram starts beating on the door. I look around the room to see what could be of help, before spotting what looks like a circuit breaker..

I run towards it, opening it up just as the SWAT team burst in, before quickly slashing it, making the place go dark. I quickly switch to Night-Vision, letting me see the SWAT team. The door I came through is on the other side of the room, and the SWAT have flashlights attached to their assault rifles so I'll have to be stealthy. I sneak around the room as quietly as I can, quickly rolling out of an incoming flashlight beam.

"What the fuck happened here.." I hear one of the say, as I slide right past him and towards the door.

"Hey, I think I can get the power working again." I hear, so I quickly advance to the door, slipping through it just as the power comes back on. I turn off night-vision and run towards the staircase, and luckily there aren't any cops around. I head into the room where I climbed into, and look out of the window. Fuck. There's a whole SWAT team down there…. maybe if I can just get one…

I wait until they aren't looking until I begin to climb down the building. Once I know I'm at a safe enough distance to fall, I drop down behind one of the SWAT members and hold my claws up against his neck.

"Guys!" He cries out as the SWAT turn and immediately point their guns at me.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." I tell them.

"What do you want?" A member who looks to be like the leader says.

"Is the perimeter clear?" A voice comes from his radio.

"Say Yes and this man goes home to his family tonight." I demand.

"Do you seriously think I'll-"

"Do you have someone you care about? What would you do to keep them safe?" I tell him. He looks at me for a second, before motioning to his men to lower their guns.

"Is the perimeter clear?" The voice repeats.

"Perimeter clear." He says, and I immediately let go of the SWAT member and I run off to the car. I then feel a bullet hit my back, to which I reply to by turning around, and staring down the soldier that shot it. He stares back in shock, as I grin before running back to the car, and leaving the area.

"Mole, are you awake?" I radio him.

"I am now. You find something?" He replies, groggy.

"It ain't the guy I'm looking for, but I have a feeling I'll find him very soon."

* * *

 **A/N: Hey, remember that first chapter that had all that gore and shit? Well, I've finally filled in the gaps to it! Yay! Anyway, if you liked this chapter, or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as that would be very appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	22. Chapter 21: Fully Operational

**I can't believe I have to go back to school next Friday, it's gonna SUUUCK.**

 **001, yes, I finally tied into that chapter which I stupidly put 4 months ahead of the start of the story, I'm such an idiot. Oh well. As for Glenn and Shane, yeah, they were paying homage to Walking Dead characters. Two other peoples' names are reference to something, can you guess what it is? Also, I might read your story but I haven't seen all of The Walking Dead or any of the Apes movies, and I'm busy, but I'll try! Need to see Spider-Man Homecoming though, but I've seen everything else. And welcome back Smarvin! It's good to have you back!**

 **Oh, and, HOLY SHIT 150 REVIEWS! THAT'S AMAZING! THANK YOU SO MUCH!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _The Next Morning_

"You said you found the place? Where is it?" I frantically ask Christophe.

"Very close to ze city centre, another fucking warehouse, but, zis will interest you a bit. Before ze joint went bankrupt, it was owned by a small professional wrestling company. Zhey ran out of business, and now ze mob 'as taken over." He explains.

"Where?!" I ask again.

"Glendale. I'll send you ze exact address on your phone." He says.

"I'm going now." I'm about to walk to the door.

"In ze morning? Are you fucking crazy?" He says.

"That dude I interrogated, he said this man hosts fights between these girls. This place sounds like the place I should be looking for. The longer I wait the more time I lose." I say.

"But you just went out last night! You 'ave barely 'ad any sleep in weeks, and zis Heidi chick 'as told me about ze bruises you keep getting from zis shit!" He argues.

"Your point?" I say, ignoring him.

"My point is, go 'ome, get some sleep, do zis tonight, not fucking now when the chances of getting caught rise by 300%!" He says. I sigh, moving away from the door.

"Fine. I'm going at midnight." I give in.

"Good, because zhere is somezhing to show you." He says, leading me outside. We walk down to the back of the lot, until we reach a familiar storage unit.

"Dude, I know about your Supercar. You don't need to show it off for the 700th time." I say as he opens the door, revealing the car.

"Zat's not what I'm showing you." He says, before opening the main door. He hops in the passenger seat before motioning me to get inside. I get inside before he presses a button to close the door, making the interior nearly completely dark, until a bunch of lights on the dashboard light everything up.

"That's fancy and all, but, why are you showing me this?" I ask.

"Well, someone 'as to teach you zis shit before tonight." He says, and my eyes widen.

"No, no, no, I ain't driving this!" I protest.

"Okay, why are you being a cowardly beetch right now?" He asks.

"This thing is like a fucking tank, which is the most obvious vehicle ever!" I say.

"It's in Stealth Mode." He says.

"Sorry, what?" I ask.

"Stealth Mode. Thanks to ze blackness of ze vehicle, and it's 'eadlights being off, you will be barely visible in ze night." He says.

"Okay, problem with that. How am I going to use this on a normal road without anyone calling the cops? And if there are no headlights, how will I see?" I ask.

"Relax, look here." He points to a large screen in the middle of the dashboard.

"I 'ave programmed a route taking you to ze place while using alleyways and empty back roads only. Just follow it and it should take you to ze back of ze building."

"It's a supercomputer?" I ask.

"Oui, it is. As for ze 'eadlights issue, you will be able to see ze road since ze windows 'ave displays on ze inside, which brighten up when ze 'eadlights are off at night. Also, make sure not to press zat big round button in ze centre." He says.

"Why?" I ask.

"It deactivates stealth mode, and, well, you'll see for yourself." He smiles.

"Okay…" I say.

"What's this for?" I point to the large lever where the gearstick should be.

"Well, since ze car is automatic, I 'ave replaced ze gearstick with a throttle lever. It engages ze rocket booster at ze back when pushed to full blast, but zat disengages Stealth Mode, and ze weapons." He explains.

"Weapons?" I ask.

"You won't need zem. You're against killing ze cops, aren't you?" He asks.

"I mean, threatening their lives to escape is fine but actually killing them…. nah." I joke.

"Good." He says, opening the door. We climb out as he gives me the key.

"Remember, do not press zat button unless you need to make a getaway." He says.

"Got it." I reply. Man, this has just gotten more complicated than I ever imagined.

 _Later That Night_

I gear up, before heading to the garage where the car is stored.

"Okay, is it this button to open the door?" I think to myself, pressing a button on the key that thankfully opens the door. I hop in before pulling it down, sealing me in.

I then start up the car, with the centre screen lighting up and the windshield and the windows all brighten, allowing me to see.

"Alright, he wasn't making up shit, this is fucking kewl." I say, before driving out of the yard. The map on the display tells me to turn left, and then into an alley. I keep driving behind alleyways and buildings, taking weird turns, before I'm about to cross a road. Suddenly, a car zooms past on the road, just as I'm about to cross it, making me slam on the breaks.

"Jesus, with all this tech, it wouldn't be hard to have something tell me if a car's about to cross the road…" I say.

 _{THERE ARE NO VEHICLES WITHIN A 500 METRE RADIUS OF YOUR CURRENT LOCATION}_ I hear a female robotic voice say from the screen, making me jump a little.

"Well, thank you US military prototype technology." I chuckle, before crossing the road into another alleyway. I keep driving down back roads and alleyways before I reach the warehouse. I hide my car in the alleyway before scouting the warehouse, looking for a way in. Then I notice a door in the corner, and it seems like it's my best bet.

I sneak up to it, glancing left and right to make sure nobody sees me, before attempting to open it. The door doesn't budge, which means it's locked. Shit.

I think for a few seconds. Shooting it would cause a lot of trouble, and I don't need the cops coming right now, OR this guy escaping me. Well, the keyhole looks, just about big enough to…

- _SNIKT_ -

I stick a claw into the lock, fiddling it around until I hear a *click*, signalling the door being unlocked. I unsheathe the rest of my claws expecting someone inside, but to my surprise, there's nobody in the small entrance room. I open another door leading into a short hallway, and again, nobody. Then I begin to hear shouting and cheering, coming from a door at the end of this hallway. I walk up to it, before opening the door just a crack, but I can't see anything. I open it up halfway, revealing about 15 or so people surrounding a large cage, kinda like the ones they would use in a…. professional wrestling match! Oh no…

"Beat the shit outta her!" "Come on! I'm betting on you, you bitch!" "Skank fight! Skank fight! Skank fight!" Are among the numerous cheers, as I soon figure out what's going on…

3rd Person PoV

The two ladies, a blonde and a brunette, dressed in skimpy lingerie exchange punches in a bloody fistfight inside the cage. Suddenly, the blonde grabs an incoming punch, and pulls the brunette directly into the cage wall. As she collapses onto the floor, the blonde chokes her with her left hand while brutally beating her with her right.

"Alright, that is enough." A Spanish-sounding voice is heard from the crowd, which makes way for a tall, with an above-average build, with long, messy black hair and a chevron moustache. He enters the cage wearing a bulletproof vest and dirty jeans, with a drill in his right hand.

"Get this skank out of here." He points to the blonde, who is then dragged out of the cage by 4 men. The man then turns on his drill, holding the brunette's head up.

"You lost, bitch. You all know what's coming next." He says, before pointing the drill at her head-

 _-BANG- -BANG- -BANG-_

Two men collapse with half of their heads missing as the drill is shot out of the Driller's hand, to his shock and surprise. He looks over to where the gunshots came from where he sees a man dressed as a raccoon emptying his revolver into three more of his men.

The Coon's PoV

I holster my revolver since it's out of bullets, popping my claws as three guys rush me with knives. I stab one in the stomach before slashing the other two's necks in one swipe. I see another man raise his gun at me so I quickly pick up a knife on the ground and throw it at him, sticking it in his chest. I see that driller dude running to a door on the other side of the room, but then other gunmen start shooting at me, so I run at them, decapitating one dude, killing two others by stabbing them in the chest, before pushing them into two other gunmen, disorienting them for a bit so I can stab them both in the neck. The one man left is shooting at me with an assault rifle, which I kick away before stabbing him, pushing him up against the cage until the dies.

I hear a racket coming from that door that the driller went behind, and I can't let this guy get away. I run up to the door, throwing it open- OOF!

I'm kicked backwards several feet, landing right next to the dead body at the cage.

"Hola, bitch!" I look up to see the man in full riot gear, with special gauntlets on his arms with drills attached to them.

"Alright then." I spit before getting up and swinging at him with a right hook, but he easily dodges it. He then kicks me up against the cage and starts beating me relentless, hitting me left and right in the stomach and chest. I try to get a few hits in but his riot gear is preventing me from doing damage, as my blows to his stomach and face can't even make him flinch.

 _-BRRRRR-_

His drills activate and he attempts to hit me with them, but I block his right arm just in time. He does the same thing with his left drill, which I also block, but now I'm forced to use all my strength as I struggle to keep those drills away from my face.

"You never should have came here!" He says.

Before my arms give up, I kick him in the stomach before quickly slashing his right gauntlet, cutting it off. He then quickly swings at me with his left drill, but I duck and manage to slash off his chestpiece, leaving his torso vulnerable.

I then push him up against the cage and start to beat him in the same way he did to me, giving many blows to his stomach. He raises his left arm again, but I grab his gauntlet and use my claws to rip it in half. Now I just have to get him knocked out before the cops arrive.

I try to take off his riot helmet, but he hits me back, so I continue beating him in the stomach. I then notice that brunette he was about to kill, with the drill in her hand. She fires it up as I realise what she's going to do.

"No!" I scream before pushing him out of the way, and using my claws to knock the drill out of her hand. She looks at me in surprise but before I can respond, I get knocked down by the man. He grabs the drill, and again tries to shove it into my face, which I try to hold off, before ultimately popping my claws and jamming them in his right arm, making him drop the drill in pain. While he's distracted, I yank his helmet off of him, before punching him numerous times in the face until he's finally knocked out.

I slash the cage lock, freeing the bruised woman inside.

"Come on, get out." I tell her, and she limps her way out of the cage.

"Why didn't you let me kill this prick?!" She shouts at me.

"Believe me, he'll die in a worse way." I say to her, before she walks off.

I then begin to pull the riot gear off of this dude, getting half of it off until I begin to hear sirens getting closer.

"Shit!" I say before beginning to drag this dude out of the building.

"We know you are in there Coon! Get out of the building!" I hear someone shout through a megaphone as I drag the guy through the corridor.

When I reach the outside, there are a few helicopters in the sky, so I move quickly to drag him inside the alleyway.

I open up the back compartment, and I'm about to throw him in when a large spotlight illuminates the area.

"RELEASE THE HOSTAGE!" I hear the new Sergeant's voice coming from an overhead helicopter's spotlight blinds me for a second.

"Shit, shit, shit!" I shout, before ultimately throwing him in the back, closing the door before hopping into the driver's seat.

"Alright, okay, what button was it, what button was it…" I say as a SWAT team soon appears at the front of my car, all with their guns on me. I check the rear view mirrors to see cops block off the back.

"Right, this one!" I press the circular button under the screen, as the interior then lights up, the windshield's display darkens before headlights illuminate the area again, and the computer boots up.

 _{Stealth Mode Deactivated. Weapons Systems, Online. All Systems, Online}_ The female voice says.

 _{Coonmobile, Fully Operational}_ It finally says, and upon hearing that name, I facepalm for a second, laughing a bit.

"Mole, you are fucking crazy." I say, before stepping on the throttle, as the SWAT team jumps out of the way of the car.

3rd Person PoV

In the helicopter, Sergeant Fitzgerald is carefully watching the vehicle as it speeds through the SWAT team.

"What the hell…" She says as she continues watching.

On the ground, a cop with a megaphone is checking his watching, glancing back and forth from it and the warehouse in front of him. The roadblock he's apart of eagerly has their guns drawn at the front door… until they hear a car approaching, fast.

They all look to the left of the building, where a bulky, armoured vehicle comes speeding towards them. The cops all dive out of the way as it smashes through the roadblock, speeding down the street.

"What on Earth is he driving and why on Earth did you let him just push through you?" Sergeant Fitzgerald asks through the radio.

"Maybe 'cause he's in a TANK, Ma'am!" A cop shouts sarcastically.

"WOOOOHOOOO!" The Coon cheers as he throttles up, making sure he doesn't reach the booster level.

Cop cars that weren't smashed into by the vehicle begin pursuing the Coonmobile, as it takes sharp turns without losing speed.

 _{There are 4 DPD vehicles pursuing us, and a DPD helicopter above us. How would you like to proceed?}_ The computer asks.

"Um, give me something that can take them out of the picture, but won't kill them." Coon asks.

 _{Condensed Air Mines Selected. Targeting System, Online}_ The computer says before showing footage coming from the back of the vehicle, showing all cop cars highlighted with white squares.

 _{Tap To Engage}_ The computer says, so The Coon taps the car that's closest to him.

At the back of the car, a small flap opens and a disc is shot out, flying towards the bottom of the nearest cop car before sticking to the bottom of the car.

"What the- OH SHIT!" The cop inside shrieks as the back of his car is launched into the air by the mine, flipping his car.

More discs are shot out, launching the other 3 cars into the air, flipping them all upside down.

"Don't lose him, damnit!" Fitzgerald is furious, watching above from the helicopter.

"Get every available cop on this guy! Set up a blockade at every possible place where he could be going! Do it now!" She screams into the radio as the Coonmobile continues down the roads, now with 5 more cop cars chasing him.

"Fuck, that's not good." The Coon says as he sees road spikes laid down on the ground, but what's worrying him more is the roadblock further down the road, now with more cars blocking.

"Guess I can't burst through this one." He says, before driving right over the spikes, which have no effect on the car due to the upgrades on the tires. The cop cars following him though…

"Oh, you idiots." Fitzgerald facepalms as she watches the cop cars run right into the spikes, with all of them crashing out as the Coonmobile cruises closer to the roadblock.

"Hmm.." Cartman wonders before gripping the throttle.

"Ma'am he's coming straight for us…" A cop radios Fitzgerald.

"HOLD POSITION." She orders as the Coonmobile reaches the roadblock.

In that moment, Eric pushes the lever into full throttle, causing fire to burst out of the back booster gradually speeding up the vehicle, as it ramps off a cop car and soars above the rest of the roadblock, clearing it before continuing down the road, leaving the cops baffled.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" Fitzgerald screams down the radio before looking at the helicopter pilot.

"Follow him!" She orders, and the chopper lines up with the street.

 _{DPD Dispatch shows no more units in the area, except for the helicopter above. How would you like to proceed?}_ The Computer says.

"Set a route through alleyways and backroads to a Storage Unit at West Evans Avenue." The Coon orders before making a sharp turn into an alleyway.

 _{Route Calculated}_ The Computer says. Cartman then presses the circular button in the middle of the console, switching off the headlights, slowing down the car so it moves out of the way of the helicopter's spotlight, and illuminating the screens on the windshield.

 _{Stealth Mode Activated}_ The Computer says as The Coonmobile evades the police.

"Ma'am, we lost him." The pilot says, and Sergeant Fitzgerald looks like she's about to pop a few blood vessels.

"Head back to to the station." She says calmly in defeat, and the helicopter moves away from the area.

Meanwhile, The Coon arrives back at the base, storing the car in the garage. He plucks the Driller from the trunk, and chucks him inside the storage unit at the very back.

"I'll get an answer from you, one way or another." He says.

* * *

 **A/N: Well this chapter was long as fuck! Guys, I have to say, the next chapter will be the final chapter of the story, which I hope to have out before school starts for me next Friday. I hope this was enough to satisfy you all until then, so if you liked this chapter or have any feedback at all, please leave a review as that would be very much appreciated. And as always…**

 **Thanks for Reading!**


	23. Chapter 22: Whatever It Takes

**Okay, this is seriously long overdue.**

 **I apologise that this took so long to write, since school has been a constant beetch recently, but I have finally found the time to write this chapter! Thank you to everyone who waited over the last two months!**

 **But enough waiting, let's get this started!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its characters.**

* * *

 _The Next Day_

The Coon's PoV

I punch his busted lip open a few more times, as he sits helplessly in the chair, tied up.

"Answer the fucking question, WHERE IS HE?!" I demand, getting slightly irritated.

"F-Fuck you." He spits blood at me, and I punch him unconscious again. I leave the room, quickly taking off the suit before heading to Mole's office.

"Nozhing, huh?" He says, watching the camera footage.

"The dude's tough but we'll break him." I assure him.

"You want me to try? I've been on both sides of zis sheet." Mole asks.

"Go ahead, but he'll realise you're working with me." I tell him.

"So?" He asks.

"He might be less intimidated if he thinks it's to help your faction of scumbags, not just one crazy guy in a raccoon mask."

"Ey, it's our faction of scumbags. You came to us." He says, picking up his shovel.

"You know, I thought you were being nice and considerate there for a second… then you said the second part." I say sarcastically.

"Like you know anyzhing about being nice and considerate." He says before leaving.

I shrug my shoulders before going over to his computer screen. Our prisoner has just woken up again as Christophe enters the room. Instead of being scared though, he begins to chuckle, with Christophe glaring at him.

This should be interesting.

3rd Person PoV

Meanwhile, in the interrogation room, the Driller is laughing his ass off as Christophe takes the shovel off of his shoulder, before whacking him right in the face with it.

"You zhink zis is funny, beetch?" He scorns, but the Driller shows him that he's still smiling.

"W-wow. I thought that -COUGH- crazy m-motherfucker was j-just some cunt trying t-to make a "difference" like that other masked f-freak." He spits more blood.

"Nah, someone's just peessed him off, I'm trying to 'elp since I'm such a nice guy. Aaaand I do prefer ze old torture every now and zhen, so, why not?" He says before hitting him in the ribs with the shovel again.

"Gargh! I'm not telling you, fucking, anything! Tell that to t-the freak." He says.

"You sure? I mean, you're in a bad way right now. Zis might be your best option." The Mole says before kicking his chair down, leaving the Driller facing the ceiling.

"Try me." He challenges. Christophe shrugs before walking out of the room. The Driller looks up as far as he can, noticing one of his captors gone, and begins to laugh again.

Suddenly, The Mole returns by kicking down the door, carrying a jerry can and a washcloth.

"Ever wonder what it's like to drown?" He asks, before covering the Driller's face with the washcloth.

"Mmmph mrrph mmmph!" He muffles.

"What was zat? I can't 'ear youuu." Mole says in a sing-song voice before beginning to pour water on his covered face, making him wriggle and squirm in pain.

Christophe taps his foot, looking at his watch, before pulling the cloth off of him making him gasp for air.

"Where is zis cunt?" He asks.

"Fuck yourself!" He gasps. Mole responds by stomping his face, covering it again with the washcloth and pouring the water on his face, but in a larger quantity.

"I can do zis all day beetch." Mole laughs, before peeling the washcloth again.

"Answer ze fucking question." He asks.

"I said fuck off!" He refuses, before Mole knocks him out with his shovel in rage.

"Fucking beetch." He mutters before leaving the room.

Cartman's PoV

I slam my head on the table a few times as he walks in, dropping his shovel on the floor.

"That was the best you could do? I thought you were a professional!" I groan.

"What? Waterboarding usually does it. Zis beetch is taking more zhan I expected." He says.

"Fuck it, I'll try something." I say, getting up from his computer.

"And what ze fuck will you do zhat will make him squeal like a baby?" He asks.

"Just watch." I say before slamming the door behind me.

I put on the suit and kick the door open, waking him up.

"This is getting embarrassing for you people." He blinks.

"I'm going to ask you again. Where is the Overlord?" I ask.

"Aren't you a shitshow." He scoffs.

I proceed to walk around to the back of the chair, where his hands are tied.

- _SNIKT_ -

I proceed to cut off one of his fingers in a clean stroke, having him screaming in pain.

"Where is he?" I ask.

"Fuck you, man!" He replies, so I cut off another finger.

"WHERE IS HE?!" I scream, cutting off another.

"GAH! STOP! I'LL FUCKING TELL YOU!" He cries in agony.

"Where?" I ask again, holding my claws at his neck.

"I-It's a makes-shift jail. B-Built, a few kilometres w-west from the c-city." He stutters.

I then quickly leave the interrogation room, take off the suit and run towards Mole's office.

"You hear that?" I say, as I notice him typing on his keyboard.

"Every word. I'm looking at satellite footage now." He responds.

"Come on, come on…" I say as I watch him work. He continues this for a minute, before sighing and face palming.

"Zhere is nothing here." He concludes.

"Son of a fucking- follow me. Bring the computer." I tell him, and we leave his office.

I put the suit on again before kicking the door open.

"You're lying." I say.

"What?! No, no, I'm not, no, that's impossible!" He says, frightened.

"Zhen what ze fuck does zis mean?" Mole shows him the computer screen.

"That's a fucking safeguard! I swear!" He says.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"I-It's like, um, it's like a cover, so satellites don't spot the building!" He says.

"That makes no sense. What about everyone in the city? What about everyone who sees the building when they drive on that fucking road?" I shout.

"They don't give a shit! And if they do, they get dragged inside and, well I don't fucking know since we never see them again! That, that picture you're showing me, it's from a field in fucking Ohio! I swear!" He squeals. I look at him for a second, narrowing my eyes.

"Check that out." I say to Mole, and he begins tapping on his keyboard.

"Son of a beetch…" He whispers under his breath.

"What is it?" I say, looking at the screen, which shows the exact same spot in a different location.

"He's right, it's ze exact same field, practically copied and pasted into every online map in ze world. This must 'ave been expensive as sheet to pull off, so 'ow did you zis?" He asks.

"I- I don't know, it's something to do with the Overlord's wealth. I've heard he's rich as fuck!" He says. I then grab him by the collar before pulling him and the chair up to my face.

"Then who is he?!" I shout.

"I don't know!" He screams. I then drop him down on the ground again.

"You've given us some valuable information. Too bad it isn't enough." I say, before popping my claws and slitting his throat.

"So there's the location." I say.

"Oui. Again, better to go at night, and you should get some rest. You'll need it." He says as I take off the mask.

"Yeah, you're right. Can you set a path to that location in the…. 'Coonmobile'." I say, slightly embarrassed.

"Haha, you so 'eard of ze name?" He laughs.

"It said 'Coonmobile, Fully Operational'. I mean that was gay as fuck." I say, fully taking off the suit.

"What about a fully grown 'uman being running around in a fucking raccoon outfit! I mean zat is fucking 'ilarious." He continues to laugh.

"Oh fuck off. You jerk off to your shovel you fag!" I laugh, leaving the room, and a cursing Christophe.

 _At The House_

I walk into the kitchen, seeing Heidi with a cooking book out and smoking pan on the stove.

"Hey Eric, can you help me with-"

"No."

"What? You don't even know what I'm about to-"

"Cooking, I can see the burning pan on the stove." I say. She then looks at me confused for a second before glancing at the pan and quickly taking it off with a worried look on her face.

"Listen, I'd love to, but I got to rest. Big night." I say before heading to the staircase.

"Big night huh? You said you had a lead like, what, a month ago? And now you're just going around again to random pla-"

"I found her." I say, smiling. She looks at me with her mouth gaping open.

"Y-You did?" She says, with her mouth also curving into a smile.

"Now I just have to break into a place that shouldn't exist, which is probably packed full of gunmen to brutally murder, AND there's also the dude who ordered the kidnapping so, I'm going to have to like, drag him through the streets of Denver, hanging him from the back of my new badass car and that's not even getting started on what I'm going to do to that motherfucker, so yeah, I'm going to need some rest." I say.

"That's great!" She says, hugging me again which kind of confuses me.

"I thought you were against me brutally killing a bunch of gunmen who totally deserve it." I say, awkwardly hugging her back.

"Oh, fuck that just processed in my brain right now." She says, before releasing the hug.

"Yeah, it's going to be one hell of a night." I say, before walking up the stairs.

"Wait! I know you have to rest and all, but, since you won't be here and I've been trying to learn new stuff to cook, can you help me for a bit? Just for like, 10 minutes or so…" She messes with her thumbs just like Butters used to do.

"Fiiiiine." I sigh, before putting on an apron.

"Thank you! Wait, you said a place that doesn't exist? How is that possible?" She asks.

"No idea, but it's probably going to be in flames by the time I'm done with it." I smile.

 _Later That Evening_

I pull up at the storage yard, where Mole is waiting for me, to my surprise.

"I didn't expect you to be here." I say as I get out of the car.

"What? It's only 8 o'clock." He replies.

"Well I wanted to be a bit early." I say, walking to the suit with him following me.

"Still don't know why you're here.." I ask.

"Well, since zis is ze day you get your mommy back, I wanted to know what you'll be doing after you leave 'ere." He says, taking me by surprise.

"Woah, who said anything about leaving?" I ask, slightly alarmed.

"You aren't? Oh sheet I thought you would leave me with all of zhese eediots to 'elp me." He says.

"Well, let's see, I've missed 4 months of school, so graduation is out of the question, same with university, no point finding a job, I have one here-

"But it's illegal."

"Ain't the worst thing I've done, even before this whole shitshow." I reply.

"Good to know you didn't pick up zis whole "Kill Everyone" zhing from me." He chuckles.

"Ah, well, I only really wanted to kill the jewrat… and I also kind of causes the deaths of a kid's parents… and then I made him their remains in chili… I'm sure he's forgotten that by now." I say, turning back to Christophe who's just staring at me with a look that reads "What the Fuck" all over it.

"Um, too far?" I say, and he shrugs his shoulders. I put on the helmet and I walk over to the car.

"So, after you are done with zis sheet, what about zis gang war zat's still going on?" He asks.

"That's a bridge we'll cross when we get to it. But the suit may come in handy." I say as I get into the car.

"Anything else I should know about this place before I go in?" I ask.

"Hmm, well, ze place is unusually small for a prison, with ze building being just one rectangular block. Zhere is only one entrance, ze front door. Ze building is also surrounded by 3 metre tall barbed wire fences, so stealth might be a hard option here." He says.

"Guess I'm bursting through it with the car. Any more.. explosive weapons in this?" I ask.

"Well, zhere are a few rockets built in, small, but ze should burst through a concrete wall." He explains.

"What are they called?" I ask.

"Mini Missiles. Same thing you did with ze Compressed Air Mines, just say it and ze computer will engage zhem." He explains.

"Alright, I guess that's all I need to know." I say.

"Well, good luck. You'll need it." He says.

"Thank you. And thank you for everything you've done for me. Without you this wouldn't be happening, and I owe you with my life." I say, and he responds by just nodding.

He closes the car door, letting the display light up. The screen lights up, showing a path through back roads and alleyways again. I zoom out, noticing it takes me off road for a bit. Hopefully this car will live up to it being called "all terrain".

I burst out onto a field, making a beeline for my intended destination. I gaze upon it as the moon rises behind it until I come to a stop about 500m from the fencing. It has a concrete wall with barbed wire fencing around it, so it looks like I'll have to burst through.

"Computer, do you have thermal imagery installed?" I ask.

 _{THERMAL IMAGERY IS NOT INSTALLED ON MY HARD DRIVE}_ It says. Shit, guess I'm going in blind.

I press the centre console button, and everything lights up.

 _{Coonmobile Fully Operational}_ The computer says.

"Select Mini Missiles." I say.

 _{Mini Missiles Selected. Targeting System, Online}_ It says, showing me an image of what's in front of me.

 _{Tap to Engage}_ It says. I slam on the accelerator, sending me speeding towards the building. I hold my finger above the screen until I crash through the gate. At the same time, I tap the screen, firing two small rockets at the wall, destroying it. I do this while screeching to a halt at the wall as it collapses before opening the door and leaping out of the vehicle.

3rd Person PoV

Inside the building, about 15 gunmen have their guns raised at the hole in the wall. Through the dust, ones close to it can see a pair of headlights.

"What the fuck…" One says as he moves forward to investigate, closely followed by two others, all wielding AK-47s. They each disappear into the dust cloud created by the explosion…

- _SNIKT_ -

Soon after, gunfire and gurgling is heard, before one of the gunmen return from the wall, with The Coon on top of him, his sharp claws embedded into his chest.

The rest of the thugs open fire, all bewildered since no one should know that this place even exists. But the gunfire is simply shrugged off, as The Coon moves to the right of the room, slashing two thugs' throats in one swipe. He grabs one of the guns and opens fire on some of the remaining thugs, taking out two more as the rest duck for cover. Because of this, he drops the gun and rushes them himself, as one gunmen pops his head out of the crate he's hiding behind. He collapses next to someone who's hiding with him, blood gushing out of his eyes, before the other man is stabbed as well.

Three gunmen from emerge from hiding at the other side of the room, opening fire on him. He runs at them, sweeping from right to left, taking out a further 3 more gunmen before he reaches them. He stabs one in the stomach before spinning around and slashing another's chest, before slicing the final's throat. With the final two remaining, knowing that they'll die, in a last ditch effort they both throw grenades at The Coon from behind a van, which he narrowly avoids the explosion. The gunmen take their chances by rushing The Coon with knives, pulling his cape down so he's on the ground, before trying to stab him. He blocks most attempts with his claws, kicking one of them away before the other jams the knife into his shoulder. He glances at the armour protecting it, and notices that due to all the bullet damage, it's beginning to finally crack. The Coon then quickly knees him in the face, making him let go of the knife before stabbing him with it in the chest. The remaining knife wielder leaps on his back, but he's quickly pulled off and thrown to the ground, before getting his throat slashed.

The Coon's PoV

I look around at all the dead bodies on the ground, and then at my shoulder. Guess the armour isn't as indestructible as I thought. I then see a door at the back, centre of the wall, which makes me think of two options: either all the girls are in there, including my mother, or the asshole who did all of this is in there. Better check it out.

I walk over there and open the door, before immediately being blasted by a flamethrower. Fucking damnit! I get burned slightly before holding my cape up, blocking most of the damage. I get a glance at his legs, and he doesn't seem to be wearing any armour like the last flamethrower I fought. I suppose they weren't expecting much fighting over here. I quickly duck before slashing his legs, making him fall. I kick his flamethrower away before stabbing him in the chest.

I take a moment to breath but I'm startled by the sound of a gasp. I glance to my right, seeing a girl, wearing tight lingerie, in a cage, staring at me and the flamethrower, scared. I then look around me, only to see that the walls are lined with cages filled with girls in skimpy clothes.

"Fucking Christ…" I mutter, looking around the long, narrow, claustrophobic room.

"I-Is he… dead?" One of them ask.

"Yeah, he is. Along with about 15 guys in the back." I tell her. I hear excited whispers around me.

"What about the man in the mask?" Another asks.

"Is that the Overlord?" I ask. She nods.

"No, I haven't killed him, yet. Do you know where he is?" I ask her, and she points to the door at the far end of the corridor.

"He's over there?" I ask.

"He should, be, um, preparing for his show now…" Another responds.

"Show?" I ask, confused.

"He usually does a show for the men here at around this time. Has some special lady." She replies.

"Will I find her through that door?" I ask eagerly.

"We've never been let in there, but I suppose so." She replies. I then leave her cage and move to the door, claws extended.

"Wait!" They ask. I look back to see them all grasping their cage bars.

"What?" I ask.

"Will you let us free?" One asks. I contemplate for a moment.

"Fine, but only after I deal with this prick." I say, before leaving the room through the door.

I enter a medium-sized room, covered in red walls with lanterns hanging on them, giving off light. Almost like some sort of temple. There are 3 rows of chairs, all facing a stage. On that stage was a woman in lingerie slumped down and tied to a sole wooden chair, and a large red curtain covering the back on the stage. The woman's hair covers her face, but she slowly tilts her head up, and I see the face of….. her.

"M-Mom?" I ask, and the woman fully raises her head, revealing a bloodied and bruised face, and a weak and tired expression on it.

"W-Who….. are….. you…..?" She says, weakly, before coughing a spitting blood.

Suddenly, a man dressed in a white pinstripe suit and a red hockey mask enters through the curtain, pausing for a moment when he sees me. He holds a black baseball bat in his hand and a revolver in the other.

"Well this was unexpected." He says.

"You piece of shit!" I growl before moving towards him. I try and hop on the stage but I walk into a glass wall; the stage is separate from the audience.

"Is, is he bothering you?" He turns to my mother, stooping down to her level and placing a hand under her chin, before sharply twisting her head so that she faces him.

"Answer me." He demands, and I pop my claws. He then quickly turns his head towards me.

"Very unexpected." He says before letting go of my mother and standing back up.

"Who are you?" I ask, but he scoffs at the question.

"Seriously? All this effort to keep my identity a secret and you think I'm just going to tell you?" He says.

"No, no, no. You barge into my home and kill all of my servants. Now that's not very nice. Besides, it would be rude if I didn't know the face of my guest." He says.

"That's not how it works." I growl.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did you think you had a choice? You came here for… her, right?" He then points the gun at Mom's head.

"Don't you FUCKING DARE!" I bash my fists against the glass wall and he cocks the revolver.

"Take off the mask, or her brains get splattered all over that wall for you to see." He demands. I retract my claws before slowly taking off my helmet. He then slowly lowers the gun before letting out a slight chuckle.

"Wait, wait, is that who I think it is? I mean, no, that's impossible, you're much more… smaller than I remember." I raise an eyebrow.

"Who are you?" I demand once more.

"I mean, I had a feeling but, THIS? You are just outdoing yourself. You played dress up just to find your mommy?" He taunts, ignoring my question.

"WHO ARE YOU?" I punch the glass wall, hoping it would break, but not even a crack appears.

"Seriously, Eric? You're smarter than this! I thought you would be able to figure this out just by the colour of the walls!" He says.

"Red?" I answer.

"Yes, yes, and what does the colour red remind you of?" He asks me in a certain tone as if I was a child.

"Blood." I say coldly.

"Mmm, close. I mean I can see the connection but no. In my opinion, the colour red seems to remind me of… chili." He says.

My eyes widen at the realisation. My mouth opens but I can't seem to say what I want to say.

"Now he gets it. Please, Eric, you didn't forget about your old half-brother, did you?" He takes off his red hockey mask, revealing the grinning face of Scott Tenorman.

"You… you, FUCKING MONSTER!" I scream.

"I'm the monster?!" He yells back, laughing maniacally.

"You had my parents killed and tricked me into eating their remains!" He reminds me of what I did back when I was a kid. Oh, fuck.

"You know what the best part about all of this is? In the end, I'm not in the wrong! EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS TO YOUR PATHETIC, SLUTTY LITTLE MOTHER IS ON YOU!" He smiles, as I step back in shock.

"And believe me, the last four months of punishment isn't even the beginning. I will make sure that you remember being, SO CLOSE, to saving your mother, and then, I will give the both of you living hell. I'll have every single dirty, filthy criminal in this city give your favourite slut EXACTLY what she deserves. I will attach her corpse to a truck and drag it through the streets of Denver, painting the city walls red. AND THEN, I WILL PUT HER BROKEN BONES AND BLOODY SKIN IN MY OWN CHILI, AND FORCE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT LIKE YOU DID WITH MY PARENTS!" His voice is full of rage and anger.

"E-Eric…" My mother's head tilts up again.

"Oh, do you have something to say dear?" Scott says in a mock caring voice.

"I-Is, this, t-true?" She looks at me with regret on her face. I fail to come up with an answer.

"Oh yes, yes it is, all of it." Scott finally says.

"I'll, I'll…" I struggle to find any words.

"What will you do? Enlighten me." He sneers.

"I'll tell everyone what you've been doing." I weakly say. He facepalms but I keep talking.

"Everyone w-will know what has been happening to these girls." I say.

"And they'll trust the boy who has been gone for 4 months? What do you think everyone will see when the see the boy who has gone on a chaotic murderous rampage over the last 4 months? Hell, you even have stolen military technology." He smirks.

"You can't tell people who I am, and I can't tell people who you are, or else everything goes to shit, and your mother would still die with me." He taunts.

"Oh, fuck! With all this rambling I forgot that I have a show to do! And, since you're the only audience we have at the moment… the show must go on!" He snaps his mask back on his face while twirling the bat in his hand, before bringing it down onto my mother's head.

I lunge towards the glass wall, slashing at it with my claws but it still wouldn't crack, as he continues to mercilessly beat my mother with his baseball bat, until she fall forwards, her head bouncing off the stage in front of me.

"YOU SICK FUCK!" I yell at Scott, who then unties my unconscious mother from the chair and throwing her on his shoulder.

"Apologies, but I fear, since you have compromised this location, we must leave. Such a shame, I was starting to like it here. But don't you worry! The goodbye party has been sent coordinates to this location. I know you will plough through them easily, but we don't want you following us that easily, now do we?" He glances at my mother.

"But anyway, farewell Eric Cartman!" He disappears behind the curtain with my mother, and the door behind me bursts open. I quickly turn around to meet three gunmen quickly surrounding me.

"So this is the famous Coon, huh?" One of them quirks as he shuts the door behind him.

"It's just some kid, what a waste." Another spits.

I glance at all three of them, eyeing them up.

"Well? What are you waiting for?" Another smirks, before I put on my mask.

3rd Person PoV

5 gunmen wait outside the room, in the whore-cells.

"Jesus, it's a fucking slaughterhouse back there." One says.

"I don't know why those 3 dumbasses are taking him by themselves if he did all this." Another says.

"Those 3 cunts are full of themselves." Another scoffs. He sees one of the girls staring at him through the cage.

"The fuck are you looking at, you whore." He points his gun at her, but before he can fire, faint gunshots and muffled screams are heard from behind the door. The 5 gunmen all aim their guns towards it, as the girls watch eagerly.

The door suddenly bursts open, with a corpse being thrown at their feet. The gunmen look down at his bloodied back before looking up to see the pissed off Coon moving quickly towards them.

"Open fire!" One yells and they all begin to unload on The Coon, but he still advances. He quickly slashes two in the throats before stabbing a third in the stomach, throwing them towards the last two, knocking them over. Then, in one motion, he twirls around, slashing the locks of the cages and the chests of the men with his claws.

"Thank you!" The girls quickly flock out of their cells.

"There are some vans in next room. Leave as quickly as possible before more people arrive." He says to them.

"Did you, did you kill him?" One asks, which he ignores before running out of the room. He goes through the hole in the wall before entering his car.

"Computer, locate any running vehicles in the area." He says, backing away from the building.

 _{There is one helicopter appearing on my rad-}_

"WHERE?" He demands, and the computer places a square around the helicopter on the windshield display. The Coon slams on the accelerator, speeding towards the helicopter.

Suddenly, his phone rings, and he pulls it out to see Heidi's name on the screen.

"Ugh." He spits, before declining the call.

"Computer, lock a mini missile on that helicopter."

 _{The target is out of lock-on range}_ The computer says.

"FUCK!" He yells, thrusting the throttle forward, activating the afterburner. The phone rings again, and The Coon groans before answering it.

"What?" He growls.

"Eric, Eric, get here please." Heidi says in a whisper.

"What's going on?" Eric asks.

"There's these guys, they pulled up at our house. I hid Grandma in a closet and I'm hiding under my bed. I, I think they're armed. I've already left a message for Mole." She whispers.

Before he could say anything, he hears a scuffle in the room.

"You think you can hide from us little girl?" He hears a muffled voice, and the phone abruptly cuts off.

Eric drops the phone, contemplating what to do next. He looks at the helicopter, and then back at the phone.

"Fuck it." He does a U-Turn, before firing the throttle again. He prints in coordinates, giving him a route to the house, before speeding off towards it.

 _At The House_

The Coon's PoV

I arrive at the house, noticing a black jeep parked outside.

"Oh no.." I mutter before quickly fleeing my car. I enter the house, searching room to room.

"HEIDI!" I yell out, before fleeing to her room. I burst through the door, where Billy Miller stands, hands behind his back and a large smirk on his face, with Geoff and Jeremy holding both Heidi and Cyndie at gunpoint.

"Nice to finally see you again Jack." He says.

"Or should I say, Eric Cartman?" He holds up Heidi's phone, revealing my name on the call log.

"I'm glad you and this little bitch here bumped into my men at that coffee shop. We wouldn't have been able to find you if that were the case." He says.

"Billy-"

"Take off the stupid mask. It's ridiculous." He demands. I slowly take it off, dropping it on the floor.

"Now, where should I begin. Ah yes, that's right, how you betrayed me all those years back and it ended up with my mother killed!" He clenches his fists.

"Billy, leave them. They had nothing to do with that." I plead.

"And then you betrayed me again, and now the once glorious mob has been reduced to a ragtag group of shitheads thanks to this pathetic gang war!" He yells.

"I had to do what was necessary to find my mother." I reveal.

"Oh, _your_ mother? That whore probably deserves whatever she's receiving right now." He spits. I then clench my fists at the remark.

"Oh, I'm sorry, are you getting angry? Well, just to fix this mess, I'll kill you first, and then I'll blow the brains out of this old hag too. But the girl? I suppose I can hand this to The Overlord as a peace offering." He smirks.

"LEAVE HER OUT OF THIS." I growl.

"Y'know, betraying me once was bad enough. Betraying me twice was the biggest mistake you have ever made in your life." He says.

"No it wasn't." I pop my claws.

"Well, so be i-GAH!" A bullet pierces the window behind him, striking him in the back and going through his chest. In the confusing, I quickly snatch my revolver, shooting both Geoff and Jeremy in the head as Billy collapses to the ground.

"Who the fuck.." I mutter, looking at his body, who is barely still alive.

"ZAT MOZHERFUCKER DESERVED ZAT!" I hear in my audio receptors.

"Mole?" I ask.

"Oui, Oui, I got a call from your beetch and I'm parked about a quarter of a mile away, so I'm covering you with sniper fire." He explains.

"Well, you sure got him." I reply.

"Enough chit chat. My zhermal scope is telling me zat zhere are 3 trucks approaching ze 'ouse, each with 4 armed gunmen inside. I can get one of ze drivers, but ze I can't load my bullets zat quickly. You take down ze bulk of zem and I'll provide cover." He says.

"Alright, I'm on it. Heidi, hide your Grandma until I say it's safe, okay?" I say.

"Got it. What about him?" She points to Billy, who is trying to drag himself closer to Jeremy's gun.

"I'll deal with him after." I say, kicking it away. I then put on my helmet before popping my claws.

"Stay away from the windows, and stay with Cyndie. I'm going to end this." I say, before heading to the front door.

I kick it open, revealing 11 gunmen quickly piling out of their trucks, and a bloody stain on one of the windshields.

"YEAAAARRRGHHH!" I scream, rushing them. They open fire but I lunge at two of them, stabbing them in the chest. I then use one as a meat shield before pulling out my revolver, killing 4 more men with my remaining bullets. I then quickly rush at the last five, slashing one in the throat, kicking one away while stabbing another in the stomach, slashing another in the face while the last two are wiped out with a collateral sniper bullet.

"That's all of them." I radio Mole.

"Alright, I'll be zhere in a minute." He says. I then rush back into the house.

"Alright! It's over!" I shout, and Heidi quickly comes out of hiding.

"I hid Grandma in her room, she's in her bed. She needs the rest." She says as I head up to her bedroom. Billy is still inching towards the gun, which I pick up.

"You know, you were saying something before you got your spine shattered by the Mole a couple of minutes ago. What did you say?" I ask him, kneeling in front of him.

"T-T-This, w-was the biggest, m-mistake, you h-have ever, m-made." He coughs out.

"You're wrong." I say.

"I did many bad things, because I thought that all I needed in my life was my mother. I was wrong. My biggest mistake in my life, was thinking I only cared about her." I say, glancing at Heidi.

"Without my friends, I would be nothing." I say, standing up.

"You, w-will, rot, in, hell, Eric Cartman!" Billy spits blood.

"This isn't Eric you are talking to. I, am The Coon." I say, before putting a bullet through his skull.

"Hey, thank you, for saving us." Heidi says.

"Technically you should be thanking Mole." I say, and she raises an eyebrow.

"Okay, I might have helped." I smile, but I remember what I lost today, and my smile fades.

"Did you.. find her?" She finally asks.

"Yeah, I-I did." I weakly say.

"You couldn't save her, could you?" She says, sorrowfully.

"She was, so close, but she was taken from me, again…" A tear streams from my eye as Heidi embraces me.

"Don't worry, you'll get her." She assures me. A car horn is heard outside.

"Mole." I say, and we head back outside.

"Well, isn't zis a sheetshow." He says, looking around at the yard with his sniper resting on his shoulder.

"Thanks for coming, Mole." Heidi says.

"No problem. Looks like I came just in time too." He says.

"You sure did." I smirk.

"Well, did you get 'er?" He asks, and I lower my head.

"Fuck, I'm sorry." He says.

"Do you know who took her in the first place?" Heidi asks.

"Yeah, but you have to keep this to yourselves. This cannot get out." I say, and they nod.

"The Overlord is, Scott fucking Tenorman." I clench my fists just saying his name.

"That kid that you tricked into eating his parents?" Heidi asks.

"Wait, you did what?" Mole asks.

"It's a long story. But his revenge plan includes kidnapping, raping, and selling all of Denver's eligible prostitutes, including my mother." I say, bitterly.

"Well, at least we know who zat fucker is now." Mole spits.

"Shit, what about the yard? This place looks like a slaughterhouse." Heidi says.

"I'll 'ave ze corpses and trucks gone by ze morning, don't worry. Nobody will find out what 'appened ere." Mole assures him.

"Looks like I'll have to stay a little longer." I say.

"But, they know where we live." Heidi says.

"Zis can't be what's left of zat mob zhough, right? Cannot be." Mole says.

"So, what are we going to do?" Heidi asks.

"You won't do anything. This is my fault, and I'm going to fix it." I say.

"But how?" She asks.

* * *

 _The Next Night_

"You didn't have to come along." I say to Mole as we park in the alleyway.

"Eh, I hated zhese cunts anyway." He says, loading an M16. We exit the Coonmobile, gazing upon the Warehouse.

"So, zis is ze place?" He asks.

"Yeah, now, we could either go in quiet, and take them out silently. Or we could go in loud, and light it up." I say.

"Which way do you want to do it?" I ask Mole, which he replies by smirking.

"Of course." I say.

- _SNIKT_ -

* * *

 **A/N: FINALLY. After about two months of writing I'm finally done with this story! Holy crap this took longer than I thought. I enjoyed writing Cartman in a new way, and expanding what I had with the two Mysterion stories, and I hoped you all enjoyed reading this story as much as I have had fun writing it. So, if you liked this chapter, or have any feedback whatsoever, please leave a review as it would be much appreciated! And, of course, as always…**

 **THANKS FOR READING!**


	24. Epilogue

**Okay, before you continue reading, the next installment in the series might not begin until as late as Christmas, due to school and what not. Also because I want to have this plot fully realised before I begin writing.**

 **But until then, here's a little something to satisfy the wait.**

* * *

 _One Month Later_

 _US Penitentiary Maximum Security Prison, Southern Colorado_

 _4:00 AM_

3rd Person PoV

The prison is deadly silent, minus the few night watch guards that roam the facility. Most of the prisoners are asleep, but they are soon waken up by a loud static noise coming from the speakers inside.

"What the fuck's going on?" The warden radios the guards, pissed off that he has been woken up.

Suddenly, the static switches to a musical beat. All the doors open except the prison cells as a guitar riff plays, before the music pauses briefly.

"I want to break free." Lyrics are sung as a loud bang is heard through the corridors. The alarm sounds and most of the guards wake up. Multiple gunmen breach through the prison as they engage the guards.

"I want to break freee." The song continues as gunmen burst into the warden's office, gunning him down. They then grab a set of keys before making their way through the prison.

"I want to break free from your lies, you're so self satisfied I don't neeeeed you." The music continues as a helicopter lands at the prison.

"GOD KNOWS! GOD KNOWS I WANT TO BREAK FREE!" The song continues as the gunmen stop at a cell with prisoner ID: 3811519. They wait outside as the men from the helicopter stride into the prison. They reach the cell door and open it, shedding light on someone sitting there in the darkness.

"Well, it certainly took you long eno- oh, I wasn't expecting a bunch of suits." The prisoner scoffs, as a man with a red mask enters the cell.

"It took me a long time to find a way into this prison. It took me longer to decide what song to use." The man says.

"What do you want?" The prisoner scoffs.

"Co-operation." The man asks. The prisoner begins to laugh.

"What's so funny?" The man asks.

"The last time I worked with someone it didn't end well for them." He chuckles.

"This is different." The man replies.

"How so?" He asks.

"In light of some particular, events, over the last five months, I have determined that your "skills" are required." He says.

"Aaand, what's in it for me?" The prisoner asks. The man then snaps his fingers, before being handed something by one of his men.

"You get to create some chaos." The man says, tossing a silver helmet to the prisoner, who catches it.

"Alright.." The prisoner leans forward into the light, revealing his messy blond hair, and a large scar covering his left eye.

"You have peaked my interest." He grins.

* * *

 _5 Hours Later_

A man suddenly jerks awake in his bed, breathing heavily before frantically looking around the room. After a moment, he sighs, lying back on his bed.

"Kenny…" A female voice says to him, and he turns to see a yawning naked blonde next him, her body covered by the bedsheets.

"Sorry, Bebe, did I wake you up again?" Kenny says.

"It's okay. Was it that nightmare again?" Bebe asks him.

"Yeah, it was." Kenny rubs his eyes.

"Kenny, don't be scared, it's just a bad dream. You'll have to let it go eventually." She says.

"I know Bebe, but, it's just, I don't think I can forgive myself for what happened to-" Bebe cuts him off by placing a hand on his chest.

"Kenny. Please. I can't watch you like this every day. It's heartbreaking." She says, visibly worried.

"I'll try, Bebe, I'll try." He says. His ears perk up, and he sits up, trying to focus.

"Do you hear something?" He says.

"No, nothing." Bebe replies.

"I must be going mad." Kenny lies back down.

Bebe then gives off a devious grin.

"You know, I think I should do something to make you feel better." She teases, sliding her hand under the sheets.

"Oh! Oh, okay then. But, what about my parents?" Kenny asks.

"Didn't you say they don't get home for another 3 hours?" She smiles, before hiding under the covers herself.

"Oh, I love you." Kenny smiles, before ducking under as well.

But as they fool around under the sheets, a radio buzzes under the bed, hidden inside a box.

"Code Black, Code Black. Denver is on high alert, we have just received word that Leopold "Butters" Stotch has escaped prison. I repeat, Professor Chaos has escaped prison. God help us all…" The voice of Sergeant Fitzgerald says, uneasy.

The transmission ends, as the radio remains quiet inside the box, hidden, along with only a few shurikens...


End file.
